Catalyst
by LazyFae
Summary: Accidentally bitten, deprived of the Cullens' classy veneer, Bella discovers vampire society to be filled with turmoil. She needs to learn to survive this new dog-eat-dog life, and learn fast. In a world that cares little for innocence, naivety or morality, Bella tries to find a place without sacrificing too much of herself.
1. Drowning in fire

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the general plot and OCs

 **IMPORTANT AND QUITE POSSIBLY ONLY WARNING:**

This is not an extremely dark story but nor is it all light hearted and fluffy. I haven't got the details of the plot fully fleshed out yet and thus can't say for certain what may or may not be within it.

I will say this: If it can be perceived for a person to do something/have something happen to them it may well be in this story

 **This may or may not include:** **Pairings of all genders and ages. Non consensual and dubious consensual content. Violence. Abuse. Character deaths. Angst. Plot holes (sort of inevitable with twilight). discrimination and prejudice. excessive fluffiness and icky romance. Much more.**

That's not to say it will definitely have all this in it, however I'm not too interested in flubbing over a scene or pussyfooting around a topic because it's uncomfortable if it's relavent to the plot. Having said that though, I try to avoid excessive over dramatising of something by using these devices. If it's included I will try to do the topic genuine credit and treat it with the seriousness it deserves as long as it's not a parody or a character being politically incorrect.

Along that topic, **the plot and characters do not necessarily reflect my own views** and so if you are horribly offended by what's coming out a characters mouth/mind or their actions chances are I disagree too, but that doesn't mean they'll get punished for it because the world doesn't always work like that either.

 **ALSO:**

 **I have no beta.** Please forgive grammar, punctuation, spelling mistakes, plot holes and general mistakes- don't hesitate to point them out to me so I can correct. This definitely includes cultural mistakes I've made because I'm British writing pretty much all non-brit characters, as well as characters who have formed their identities in countries and times I've never lived and learnt little about.

This is my first fanfic I'm allowing anyone to read ever that's not myself. Also it's twilight. I'm not a hater but I'm not a lover either. I don't like mushy romances and I wrote this chapter and the bones of the plot quickly (for me) out of frustration at the lack of bamf Bellas that didn't have an attitude problem, an addiction to drugs/drinking/leather/black outfits/smoking/motorbikes/delinquent behaviour/swearing/massive libido, and no brain. So it's definitely not my best work by far.

I don't promise regular updates. But I won't abandon this. Even if it's to do a shitty hurried job and bosh it out. This is me metaphorically blowing the dust off my creative writing, so I can focus on writing what I'm more passionate about and do it justice.

So... here you go. Enjoy my dust.

 **LONGASS A/N OVER!**

* * *

 ***** (taken from New Moon. Not mine) *****

"She won't be happy about this."

"About what?" I said eagerly, inviting him to continue. He was glaring into the trees, away from me. I took advantage of his diversion, taking a furtive step back.

He looked back at me and smiled–the expression made him look like a black-haired angel.

"About me killing you," he answered in a seductive purr.

I staggered back another step. The frantic growling in my head made it hard to hear.

"She wanted to save that part for herself," he went on blithely. "She's sort of… put out with you, Bella."

"Me?" I squeaked.

He shook his head and chuckled. "I know, it seems a little backward to me, too. But James was her mate, and your Edward killed him."

Even here, on the point of death, his name tore against my unhealed wounds like a serrated edge.

Laurent was oblivious to my reaction. "She thought it more appropriate to kill you than Edward–fair turnabout, mate for mate. She asked me to get the lay of the land for her, so to speak. I didn't imagine you would be so easy to get to. So maybe her plan was flawed–apparently it wouldn't be the revenge she imagined, since you must not mean very much to him if he left you here unprotected."

Another blow, another tear through my chest.

Laurent's weight shifted slightly, and I stumbled another step back.

He frowned. "I suppose she'll be angry, all the same."

"Then why not wait for her?" I choked out.

A mischievous grin rearranged his features. "Well, you've caught me at a bad time, Bella. I didn't come to this place on Victoria's mission–I was hunting. I'm quite thirsty, and you do smell… simply mouthwatering."

Laurent looked at me with approval, as if he meant it as a compliment.

"Threaten him," the beautiful delusion ordered, his voice distorted with dread.

"He'll know it was you," I whispered obediently. "You won't get away with this."

"And why not?" Laurent's smile widened. He gazed around the small opening in the trees.

"The scent will wash away with the next rain. No one will find your body–you'll simply go missing, like so many, many other humans. There's no reason for Edward to think of me, if he cares enough to investigate. This is nothing personal, let me assure you, Bella. Just thirst."

"Beg," my hallucination begged.

"Please," I gasped.

Laurent shook his head, his face kind. "Look at it this way, Bella. You're very lucky I was the one to find you."

"Am I?" I mouthed, faltering another step back.

Laurent followed, lithe and graceful.

"Yes," he assured me. "I'll be very quick. You won't feel a thing, I promise. Oh, I'll lie to Victoria about that later, naturally, just to placate her. But if you knew what she had planned for you, Bella…" He shook his head with a slow movement, almost as if in disgust. "I swear you'd be thanking me for this."

I stared at him in horror.

He sniffed at the breeze that blew threads of my hair in his direction. "Mouthwatering," he repeated, inhaling deeply.

I tensed for the spring, my eyes squinting as I cringed away, and the sound of Edward's furious roar echoed distantly in the back of my head. His name burst through all the walls I'd built to contain it. Edward, Edward, Edward. I was going to die. It shouldn't matter if I thought of him now. Edward, I love you.

 ****End extract****

Through my narrowed eyes I barely caught the split second movement between Laurent's pounce and the black blur that brushed past me to slam into him millimetres in front of me.

My mind scrambled to catch up with the pace of events which had occurred between the space of two heart beats and resulted in the vampire's lithe form smashing through three trees in quick succession.

Despite my mind's insistence on its impossibility, my eyes were seeing a muscular animal the size of a horse, with a tail resembling that of a canine, which had been fast and powerful enough to both catch a vampire off guard and knock it clear across the meadow, pulverising multiple trees. I was frozen in shock that I was still alive and fear that it may not be for long; whether death by vampire or by beast.

"Wolf," Edward's stunning voice warned me, "don't move an inch".

I noticed then that that despite being the far easier prey, the black wolf hadn't shifted its gaze toward me for a moment. Laurent was on his feet as fast as I could comprehend the situation, he was staring at the wolf in fear, shifting backward carefully further into the tree line.

A brief inhale had his head snapping toward where the wolf had come from, 'I don't believe it,' he breathed in horror.

Almost simultaneously, Laurent spun and ran, the black wolf gave a deep rumbling growl, leaping after him, and four more horse sized blurs raced past me across the meadow after them, snarling and snapping so loudly that I covered my ears from the sound.

And then I was alone. I distantly noticed my knees buckling from shock and a sob ripping its way out of my throat as I fell onto my hands. The whole thing had taken seconds to occur but it felt like a life time and I was still not out of danger.

 ***** (taken from New Moon not mine) *****

It didn't make any sense. I knew I needed to leave, and leave now. How long would the wolves chase Laurent before they doubled back for me? Or would Laurent turn on them? Would he be the one that came looking?

I couldn't move at first, though; my arms and legs were shaking, and I didn't know how to

get back to my feet.

My mind couldn't move past the fear, the horror or the confusion. I didn't understand what

I'd just witnessed.

A vampire should not have run from overgrown dogs like that, ***** no matter their speed and strength *****. What good would their teeth be against his granite skin?

And the wolves should have given Laurent a wide berth. Even if their extraordinary size had taught them to fear nothing, it still made no sense that they would pursue him. I doubted his icy marble skin would smell anything like food. Why would they pass up something warmblooded and weak like me to chase after Laurent?

I couldn't make it add up.

A cold breeze whipped through the meadow, swaying the grass like something was moving through it.

I scrambled to my feet, backing away even though the wind brushed harmlessly past me.

Stumbling in panic, I turned and ran headlong into the trees.

 ****End extract****

At first I paid no attention to where I was headed, focused only on what I was running from.

Eventually, the burning feeling in my chest, which had steadily been getting worse over the past few minutes, made itself known to me past my adrenaline fuelled panic and I collapsed onto my knees when I reached a river.

I had no idea where I was, having not thought to check my compass. I crawled forward, toward the cool water source, with sharp shallow gasps that were on the wrong side of hyperventilation.

I splashed my face and upper chest from the river, hoping to cool my over heated skin, however, after a few moments I realised that the pain in my chest was not going away. It was in fact getting exponentially worse.

Looking down on my self and tugging my damp top away from my sweaty skin, it took me a second to notice the spot from which the pain radiated its way through my chest. It was a relatively small nick on my skin, just deep enough for a light trickle of blood to curve its way over the top of my left breast and down the valley between them.

As though waiting for my notice, the pain flared up suddenly, flickering its way through my flesh and skin like fire. I bit my lip to restrain the scream that wanted to scrape its way out of my throat. Despite the invisible fire heating it's way through my blood, I recognised that I had felt this before; in a ballet studio, barely conscious, with Edward about to save my humanity by sucking venom from my wrist.

My heart stuttered at the realisation, and my breath caught in my throat. There were no Cullens to save me this time. Edward was long gone, and although I loved him with everything I had, I recognised that it was not reciprocated. I had wanted to become a vampire to spend the rest of my immortal life with the person I loved most in the world. Now I was going to become a vampire to spend the rest of eternity knowing I would never be enough.

My mind shied violently against that thought and the agony in my chest that accompanied it came from both the venom that was about to end my life, and the hole in my chest that had been my unwelcome companion for months.

Fire licked its way deeper and hotter into my chest. My arms collapsed underneath me and I curled up on my side, gasping with the torture of it. I resisted the wails that were desperate to escape my mouth, biting almost clean through my bottom lip.

The smell and taste of my own blood made me gag and dry heave into the damp soil below me. My thoughts cast desperately for a distraction from the numerous unpleasant sensations.

They jumped frantically inside my brain and were discarded just as quickly; oh god what would Charlie think? I had no real understanding of what I was about to go through. No one was going to help me get to grips with being a vampire. Was I going to kill people? Edward wouldn't know what happened to me. Would he care if he did? I was never going to see Jacob again, maybe I wouldn't have anyway, he had left me behind as easily as the others. Victoria was coming for me. I was more alone than ever.

My internal panic was stopped suddenly by a familiar and beautiful voice, "Bella, you have to keep moving. You're not safe here."

Edward's velvet, worried tone reminded me of the wolves and Laurent. Either one of them could be coming for me at any time. It wouldn't be difficult to track me by scent.

But could I move fast enough? Far enough? The fire was spreading unhesitatingly through my upper torso and getting hotter as it went. Could I do this? Where would I go?

"Follow the river. It will dampen your scent. One step at a time," Edward stated, an urgency in his voice tempered by his soothing encouragement.

Taking a deep breath that snagged multiple times in my chest into a wheeze, I shakily made my way onto my feet and shuffled gracelessly into the shallow river. The water came up to below my knees, and I stood there for a moment, swaying in the pain.

"Downstream Bella. Stay quiet," he whispered in my ear. I had a fleeting thought that his voice was marginally clearer than before, before I pushed it aside and focused on my feet.

I knew if I fell I was not getting back up again. I couldn't afford a clumsy mistake. I whimpered in my exhale before I bit my lip once more, and began a slow awkward stumble forward. My stomach rolled in nausea from the physical torment and the taste of my blood but I kept moving.

* * *

I had no way of measuring the time as I dragged my feet forward continuously. I didn't have the mental capacity to do more than keep breathing carefully, keep going forward, don't stop.

Everything else was painpainpain. It seemed to increase with every beat of my heart, but I tried not to think about that.

Tried not to think about how each heartbeat brought with it a new level of agony I had never experienced before. Both lips were bitten shut between my teeth to prevent my screams.

* * *

Every second was filled with regret; regret that I hadn't heeded Charlie's warnings about the forest. Regret that I hadn't gone to Jessica's like I said I would. Regret that I had ever been taken to the meadow. Regret that I had ever met Laurent, or James or Victoria. Regret that I had not been worth the Cullen's protection.

As the fire in me got hotter, it became regret that James hadn't killed me that day. Regret that I had ever been created with the ability to feel pain. Regret that I had been born.

I was almost surprised, and yet not, that I never felt regret for meeting the Cullens, for Edward.

Because as I trudged onwards in increasing suffering, he was there with me whispering almost constantly.

When I stumbled, he coached me in where to tread, making up for my mind's inability to understand and make decisions on what my eyes were looking at.

When I faltered, he urged me on.

When the pain had me convinced that I should give up, he plied me with encouragement and when I wanted to scream until my throat was shredded he whispered affectionate words in my ear.

Just keep moving. One step at a time. Don't stop. Don't ever stop. Stay quiet. I'm here. You can do this. I love you so much. I'll be here every moment with you. Next foot Bella. Breathe, don't scream. You're doing so well. I'm so proud of you.

And when that was not enough in the face of the inferno that was creeping its way through my body it became; five more minutes and I promise you can stop. Just five more minutes. I'll keep track and tell you when to stop. If you stop the pain will get worse. They'll catch you if you scream, don't make me watch you die. If you let them catch up to you and kill you I'll kill myself Bella. I'll leave if you fall, I'll leave again and never come back. Just five more minutes and you can stop, I'm keeping track of the time for you and you have five minutes to go.

* * *

I knew if I started screaming I wouldn't be able to be quiet again, and had bitten through most of both my lips.

I thought at some point the light had started to grow dim, but I couldn't tell if that was due to pain blurring my sight or the passage of time.

I didn't have the capacity to care. Couldn't think past the next step. Wouldn't lift my eyes off the river a few feet in front of me.

I knew if I did, my brain would try to make sense of whatever I was looking at and then it would be free to fly off in directions out of my tight control - like any way to stop the flames burning me from the inside out and crawling through my limbs.

That way led to madness.

* * *

The water was up to mid thigh, and freezing cold. I barely noticed beyond the fact that it did nothing to cool the raging flames inside me.

* * *

Hours and hours must have gone by, feeling like eternity from when I had first entered the river.

My clothes had begun to drag me down and I thought I might be shivering but I couldn't tell.

If I wasn't vaguely aware of the water level rising and Edward's continued encouragements I wouldn't even be sure I was actually moving at all.

There was a disconnect between the commands coming from my brain and my body's response.

I had no guarantee that it would continue to listen to what I wanted it to do for much longer. I didn't even know how it was still moving.

Almost all of my attention was taken up by the burning of my entire body. Even my brain was on fire.

I didn't understand how I was still conscious. Didn't understand how I could even form the fleeting half thoughts I was still capable of.

Even thinking hurt. But I didn't know how not to think. How to end this. So I just continued breathing, moving, burning.

And always, Edward whispered. I couldn't understand him anymore, but his voice reminded some part of me that I couldn't stop, couldn't scream.

* * *

At some point I became just aware enough to realise, in the space of a few seconds - that it was pitch black.

The water was up to mid chest. It was much more forceful now and yet somehow I was still on my feet despite the fact that I was sure the speed of the water should have knocked them from underneath me.

I could hear hundreds -maybe more- little living beings around me that I was sure should be too quiet or far away for me to hear.

But most importantly, I could hear the padding paws and rasping breath of five heavy four-legged beings making their way toward me at a jog.

I froze for less than a second, as my mind floundered through the fiery pain that dominated it to figure out why this was important, what it meant, what to do.

"Run!" Edward shouted desperately, clearer than ever before. I lifted my leg up and pushed through the fire in my limbs enough to make three water-slow steps at a run.

For the first time since I got back on my feet however, I slipped.

My feet lifted off the ground and my head submerged in the frigid liquid, the breath rushing out of me in shock.

The current dragged me along at a much faster rate than I had managed to move previously.

In a matter of what felt like seconds the water had gotten dangerously rough.

My scorched body and mind, untouched by the cool temperature surrounding me, prevented me from being able to discern between air and water.

I knew I was likely inhaling as much water as oxygen, coughing and spluttering loudly and attracting attention with the noises, but it was a distant knowing, and the pain of half drowning didn't touch me.

Or if it did it mixed in too perfectly with the rest of the pain eating it's way through me. I was likely drowning and burning at the same time.

Each time my head lifted above water I could hear the approaching wolves, too disorientated and agonised to do more than notice their decreasing distance.

A sharp pain in my head made itself known above the rest for just a moment as my skull smashed against a rock. My breath escaped my lungs entirely in surprise.

"Don't breathe in Bella. Don't breathe in for as long as you can," the dulcet voice commanded, the anxiety somehow making it all the sweeter.

I latched onto the voice and its command in my complete disorientation, as my body sank and the fire charred my body -sinking into my bones, splitting open my veins, destroying my flesh.

Still I was dragged along the current, knocking into rocks occasionally to remind me that I wasn't burnt to ashes.

I held my lack of breath for an instant and an eternity, before my instincts kicked in. Somewhere in my suffering mind I needed air, and my body responded.

Water filled my lungs, my body jerked, and thrashed automatically.

Water exited my lungs briefly, and then it filled them again. My body jerked and twitched with less energy each time this occurred.

I knew I could not scream now even if I wanted to. I saw nothing but pitch black. I heard nothing but the water flowing past me, and my rushing blood raging in my ears. I smelt nothing. Tasted nothing but the water in my mouth, throat and lungs. I felt nothing but the hellish fire within me, and the heaviness in my water logged chest.

I drowned more with every breath. I was torched hotter with every heart beat. But I kept breathing, and my heart kept beating and I kept drowning and burning and living.

This was my existence as the current dragged me, faster, and then slower. Always moving. I didn't know how long for, but at some point I vaguely tasted salt on my tongue, and then more of it. Somehow I knew I sank deeper, and deeper still. But I didn't move. I closed my eyes and let the water take me as I drowned and burned continuously.

Until eventually I settled at the bottom, too heavy to be pulled gently by the water any more.

And then my lungs no longer pulled or expelled the liquid -my heart beat faster and harder and hotter, as though to make up for that fact though.

The heat raged through my entire body and left no corner unmarked, no cell in my body was not throughly wrecked by the unbearable heat. No one section hurt less than another.

Gradually though, very gradually, the fire pulled back.

First from my finger tips and the tips of my toes. Then to my knuckles, and the arches of my feet and my wrists.

Each millimetre left feeling free of the maddening burning seemed to make my heart burn that much hotter.

So slowly I wanted to moan, and yet couldn't help but observe with avid desperation, the fire pulled free from my brain, and arms and legs, and then my head entirely, leaving my neck, my shoulders and up to my hips, my waist, almost my entire torso.

My heart though, was so hot and painful as to eclipse any of the suffering I had felt before in my whole body. Hotter still it flamed, and faster it beat. I was sure it would break through my ribs and burst out of my chest.

As the last remnants of the inferno that plagued my body rescinded into my heart, it gave a few last frantic jerks, feeling as though I contained a second sun inside me, before it gave up and lay still, suddenly as refreshingly cool as the rest of my body had been the moment it was free from its inferno.

* * *

I felt, acutely, the water in my lungs still. Highly uncomfortable, and yet not painful in the slightest.

I did not breathe. I didn't open my eyes. I was consciously aware of every single muscle that I didn't twitch.

Instead I marvelled at vibrations carried through the water and caressing my skin.

I was quickly able to discern a pattern within them, and realised that the vibrations carried messages within them.

My ears received sounds which were catalogued instantly; the soothing swish of water and seaweed. I could detect incremental differences between the strength of the water going past me one way and another to tell me which way the tide was pulling.

The various sounds I heard under water told me of a vast ecosystem all around me.

I knew they told me of movement underneath the water, however it was like a language I didn't speak and had no reference for.

Furthermore I couldn't tell how far the sounds travelled to reach me, only that some were further away than others.

Each soft grain of sand and brush of seaweed against my face, my hands, my neck and collar bone, the exposed sliver of skin on my lower back, was as obvious to me as a finger swiping across me.

I distantly noted that the water felt warm to me, like stepping into a slightly tepid bath.

Besides the trailing of my hair in the current, I knew that not a single part of me twitched or shifted.

I was utterly still, perhaps for the first time in my life.

My thoughts too, were settling across my mind with a speed and clarity I had never experienced before.

Receiving and comprehending information from my senses with an efficiency I would never have imagined possible.

My mind kept track of every second, and so although I spent what felt like a leisurely eternity tracking and registering input from my new senses -due to the sheer awareness I had of every single fraction of a second- my inbuilt time keeping informed me that slightly less than 38.62 seconds had gone by.

Finally, I opened my eyes.

The sheer kaleidoscope of colors that met my gaze startled me for a fraction of a second - a noticeable pause now that I had the capacity to notice each millisecond as it went by.

I didn't have the words to accurately describe the sight I saw, even in my own mind. It was almost overwhelmingly beautiful.

The murky blue grey green that I had expected, if any color at all, was instead a stunning array of blues, some in shades I had never seen before, and certainly never so vividly. There were tones of blue greens and grey greens, and dashes of pink and orange even, from where rays of light darted through the water.

The starburst of light piercing the water from above was not just white like I would have expected, but instead I could correctly identify colors of the rainbow within it.

The rolling waves above me held exquisite detail, and to my surprise I could see with some clarity to the sky above the water.

Tiny particles of sand filled the water around me, swayed by the moving sea, and although I could spot them all and see their individual shapes and flaws, they also reflected the light like tiny specs of glitter.

With some surprise I identified that the sun was still rising, and that visibility under the water was likely a hundred times clearer and brighter for me than it was for any human being.

I lay on the sea floor for minutes that stretched onwards, revelling in the rolling water above me, the colors that cradled me and the liquid that brushed past me smoother than silk on my skin.

I couldn't remember why, but it seemed to me as though I was feeling peaceful for the first time in a long time.

I felt as though I could contentedly lie there forever, surrounded by sensations, color, and the unfamiliar sounds of life.

Eventually, though, a cluster of sounds made their way to my ears which immediately caught my attention.

Initially it started a series of clicking noises that quickly became so loud it felt as though the noises were slapping me in the face.

Accompanied by that came whistles, squeaks and whines, followed by the sounds of multiple large objects moving through the water using what I guessed to be tail fins to do so.

What had my mouth filling with a semi-viscous sweet tasting liquid though, were the throbbing vibrations that seemed to captivate me like nothing I had ever experienced before.

My thoughts narrowed down on the regular beats and all I could think about was chasing the source down.

Something about the sound ignited a fire in the back of my throat that I had somehow previously ignored.

My previously closed mouth opened slightly and a rush of tastes chased across my tongue.

I could detect the briny taste of the water, and within in it lay a thousand different complexities that each told me of a different story, which came together to form a whole picture of life underwater.

Including something that set the fire in my throat roaring. Between one fraction of a second and the next, my body reacted.

It was a minute amount that flickered across my tongue. Barely discernible.

But it was enough, and in the space of a thought, I was flying through the water toward that sound.

My limbs seemed to move on automatic. My legs and arms cutting through the liquid with a power that would have astounded me if I wasn't so focused on the throbbing that drowned all else out.

I vaguely noticed my walking boots and socks fall off my feet one after another as I powered through the water.

I was in a single minded pursuit, barely recognising the dropping temperature of my surroundings, and the light struggling to reach me.

All I noticed was the strengthening taste.

It got more and more concentrated across my tongue- more delicious- and despite it dissipating immediately into the water I knew I was producing more of the sweet tasting liquid in my mouth.

Within a few minutes, my instincts dictated that I dive further into the depths.

The pressure of the water pressed down on me, but it was an almost comforting weight around me. I felt as though I was being held securely.

Despite the decreasing light, I had little trouble picking out the cluster of prey above me.

I waited with anticipation, identifying the origin of the delicious smell. It was one of the slower large ones.

It was clearly wounded slightly, and I bared my teeth in vicious enjoyment.

I allowed myself to sink to the depths, crouching and craning my neck to eye the injured prey.

My stomach heaved suddenly, as I prepared to go in for the kill.

My mouth opened automatically and felt the jarring sensation of water travelling up my throat and out of my mouth at speed.

It continued convulsing and expelling water until there was nothing left.

And then I pushed off the sea floor beneath me with immense strength, rocketing up underneath the prey.

With only a few kicks to maintain my velocity, within seconds I met the prey I had identified, reached out and grappled on.

Before it could react more than an attempted manoeuvre away from me, my teeth latched on, biting through an unexpectedly thick skin and flesh like butter.

Rich warm liquid filled my mouth quickly, with a brackish and fatty flavour to it. I adjusted my grip as the prey began to thrash and squeal.

It dived suddenly in an attempt to remove me from it. I dug my teeth in further, a new rush of blood into my mouth, as its thrashing movements gradually slowed.

I could hear, distantly, the distressed shrieks of the other prey, but they were wary enough not to approach.

The warm fluid in my mouth slowly petered to a stop just we sank back onto the sea bed, my stomach full of liquid once more.

My teeth detached from the now lifeless body in my grasp, and it settled onto the sea bed fully.

It took a second for my mind to clear from the predatory fugue it had been clouded in, but when it did I was dismayed.

In front of me was a dead and mauled orca. It's underbelly having been torn to shreds and evidence of my mess floating in the water around me.

It wasn't so much the fact that I had just killed that threw me, it was the brutal nature of it.

I could tell, despite it having lasted no more than a minute, that the death had to have been a painful one.

More than that though, were the clear sounds of grief assaulting my ears from the other orca as they maintained their distance, but showed reluctance to leave their family member behind.

I didn't like that I had caused emotional and physical pain to multiple intelligent beings.

I didn't know much about killer whales- didn't even know if they were endangered or not- but I knew they were emotionally intelligent.

The burning in the back of my throat was largely sated, and my belly pleasantly full, but I was perturbed by the actions required to reach that state.

I didn't think I ever wanted to do that to a human being.

There was nothing I could do about the dead being in front of me though, so I turned back to the direction I knew I had come from, and began to swim through the water.

My clothes had become torn and wrecked even more than they had been before my hunt, so I ripped them from my body and continued to swim naked.

Without the same urgency that had driven me before, I lazily made my way back, passing my abandoned boots along the way.

It wasn't long before I noticed the shallowing waters and knew that I was getting closer to shore.

There was a niggling in the back of my head about going onto shore but I dismissed it and continued swimming, speeding up slightly.

I reached the cliff edges, near a beach, with the intention of climbing them and entering the trees without being seen.

Finally my head breached the surface of the water for the first time since I had become aware again.

My attempted breath was aborted immediately, as I coughed up water that spurted unattractively out of my nose and mouth.

My lungs protested the mixture of liquid and air in them by convulsing in a similar way that my stomach had done before.

It was a few moments before I could take a proper breath, but when I did, the niggling in my head became a voice.

"Wolf," it whispered in a velvet warning, labelling the slight stench in the air that I could detect emanating from land.

It was the unpleasant scent of a predator that could match me, and there was clearly more than one.

I vaguely remembered fuzzy dim flashes of overgrown beasts the size of horses and shrank back until only the top half of my head was above water.

Perhaps I should go further along the coast before I left the sea.

Following this plan, I let go of the air in my lungs and dived back under water, occasionally coming back up to smell the air for the pungent scent of wet dog.

Reaching an area of beach, a gust of wind blew a mesmerising aroma into my face. My mouth filled with sweet venom and my previously quenched throat roared with fire once more.

Instantly I slipped through the water toward the beach to drink my fill of the delectable ambrosia.

My feet touched the sand, my head breached the water along with my shoulders, and I hid behind a rock, waiting as I heard my ignorant prey approach.

My head was swimming in the scent, and I snarled silently as I waited.

A high pitched scream knocked me from my hunting mindset momentarily, and I ducked back underwater until only my eyes and the top of my head remained above.

Without the sweet smell of prey in the air to distract me, I came to the horrified realisation that I was hunting a child.

Between one second and the next I was back underwater and swimming as far away from the land as fast as I could, least temptation lure me back.

It wasn't until I was far out enough that land was a distant blur that I stopped swimming.

I didn't know what to do.

How could I go on land if every time I did I slaughtered people for my own unnecessary fulfilment?

I would rather die than become a killer for eternity.

I didn't know how but I knew that it was possible to be killed.

"Don't even think about it, Bella. All you need to do is wait until the worst of your thirst has died down and then practice," the voice reprimanded me, with stressed undertones peaking through.

"Bella," I murmured in reply, "right. That's me."

I had almost forgotten that I had a name at all. I had certainly forgotten a lot more than names though.

Every time I thought back to before the burning however, it was largely dim and difficult to push past the cloudiness.

I gave up quickly, and focused on my more immediate problem.

How would I ever practice enough to become used to the scent without killing each time I failed?

The idea of slipping up again and again filled me with a choking dread.

"I'll remind you," the voice assured me, "if I see you begin to hunt I'll remind you to swim away."

I nodded to myself, unquestioning of its ability to protect me from facing that sort of horrific situation.

I intrinsically trusted the voice to keep me safe, although I wasn't sure why.

"In the mean time, keep moving," the voice suggested. I got the sense that it was telling me this for a reason.

"Am I in danger?" I asked with some trepidation.

"Maybe," the voice replied with slight hesitation, "Don't stay in one place for too long."

It felt strange talking to a voice in my head that held no identity.

I wondered on its distinctly male tones, utterly different from my bell-like sound.

Mentally shrugging, I dubbed it Teddy, for its comforting quality and the irrationally safe feeling it gave me.

Then I ducked back under the water and continued South.

* * *

As I continued swimming, spending hours in which I wasn't hungry indolently exploring my surroundings. Through trial, error and exploration, I taught myself the language of the ocean; the meaning of the sounds and vibrations which constantly tickled across my skin and into my ears, how to judge size, distance and direction correctly from the mixture of that and taste long before I needed my eyes.

I stuck to my diet of sea creatures- whilst preferring the red blooded ones- the smaller blue blooded creatures were sometimes easier to find depending on where I was.

I had little way of telling how far out I swam, only that fairly often, it was deep and dark enough that I came across creatures I had no idea existed.

Many avoided me, and it became something of a challenge to out manoeuvre the most agile and speedy ones.

For all my flexibility, speed and strength, my body was designed to perform best above ground.

I was often caught off guard by unexpected directions and speeds.

However, it wasn't too long before I learnt how to use my assets better overall than any other creature I met.

I had my fill of underwater predators from small to large, to almost intimidatingly large - and got used to vomiting up water before each hunt to make room for blood.

My main focus however, was in the overwhelmingly delectable smell of human blood, and my desensitisation to it over time.

Despite initial repeated failures, Teddy interrupted me each time I began to hunt them, allowing me to flee back into the depths of the sea before I could hurt anyone.

Initially, I believed it would take a long time before I could safely expose myself to human beings without becoming a predator hunting prey.

However, within a few weeks, with practice multiple times a day and an almost consistently full belly beforehand, I learnt to restrain myself.

The red hot poker in my throat did not go away and dominated my attention the first week, nevertheless gradually I began to ignore it, until it was a secondary concern.

I didn't want to test myself whilst starved just yet, but I had hope that I could at least risk my presence on land and around people, and perhaps gain some mental stimulation after increasing boredom in the water.

Without the ability to sleep, the hours stretched onwards and days became meaningless, as well as dull without a book or someone to talk to.

The water and weather had become increasingly warm as I traveled further South.

The fish and plant life changed too, becoming more vibrant and colourful.

Despite my boredom it still continued to mesmerise me and I enjoyed each new discovery of color, shade or movement that I had never seen before.

* * *

When I was sure of my ability not to initiate a massacre at least for a few hours, I cautiously approached land.

I waited until the sun went down, however there was no one nearby to see me even if had chosen to leave during the day.

I knew the sight of a naked glittering woman with near unparalleled beauty would catch a lot of attention, and so chose to err on the side of caution.

I made my way forward until I was crouched, with only my head up till my eyes cleared of the water, before I sprung forward, up the rocks and toward the nearest tree line - which thankfully wasn't far.

I continued running for another half a minute until I was further into the trees, before finally taking a moment to hurl water out of my mouth and nose, with a complete lack of elegance, in order to clear my lungs.

I took a moment to orientate myself, during which I realised my mistake.

My sense of smell was one of my most powerful senses, and when clogged with water, it was very limited.

I had taken advantage of this during my time practicing human exposure, however, I hadn't accounted for how this limited my knowledge of my surroundings.

I had assumed that there was nothing out there that was quiet or well hidden enough that I wouldn't be able to notice it, but I had forgotten the most important danger; my own kind.

I took a fraction of a second to notice the unusually quiet animals around me, and the sweet smell that I instinctively knew belonged to one like me.

There was no time at all between noticing this, and the defensive crouch I slid into, a snarl on my lips.

There was a barely discernible pause, before I sensed a presence approach from my left.

I whipped my head around with a warning hiss, just as the other vampire came into view.

"Well hello. This is not a sight you see everyday," the vampire purred.

Red eyes clashed with mine and I prepared to attack.

* * *

 _Ooh, who do you think it is? Feel free to ask questions about the story, no promises for spoilers though!_

 _Tadaa! Chapter 1 complete. Btw don't expect this to stick to the plot at all, as you can see from this chapter and mermaid Bella. Also if you're waiting with baited breath for Edward to get a look at vampy Bella you'll have to defer your gratification for some time I think._

 _I'm fairly open to suggestions about where to take this as long as the major checkpoints in my plot are reached to realistically get to the conclusion._

 _I'm not expecting this to be popular so I'm up for some really out there suggestions (if anyone reads this). Not really worried about meeting mainstream expectations. Also please point out if I accidentally slip into a super twilight fanfic cliche. I don't read much non crossover twilight fan fiction so I'm not familiar with them._


	2. Missing Bella

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the general plot and any OC's

Hi all! First I'd just like to thank everyone who favourited, followed and reviewed! Seriously, a few of those reviews made me smile so much! I don't think I've squealed in my life (toddler and baby years notwithstanding) but I almost did. So close.

A quick apology for any mistakes made due to lack of beta.

No Bella POV in this chapter unfortunately. I'd intended to give the next segment of her journey after where this chapter ends, and then the next part of the search for Bella. It got longer than I thought it would though and decided to cut it off here.

I'm a little annoyed at my inability to write entirely convincingly from the male perspective but I guess practice makes perfect.

Finally; I know that Charlie's a bit ooc here compared to the original story, but he's under a lot of emotional strain and he's exhausted. I always thought if I was in Charlie's position I'd hate Edward so much during New Moon and felt so sad for him. I feel like he sort of got stuck in the emotionally repressed and largely non-communicative role. I thought I'd put him under stress till he was forced to break out of that.

As for his experience being Bella's carer (because he so was) during the unwritten months of new moon, I took inspiration from my own mother's experience doing the same for me when I was younger.

* * *

 **(Jacob pov)**

As I entered the house after another all nighter running that red-headed leech off, I grit my teeth in frustration; she was as persistent as she was slippery.

Dad was eyeing me in concern, but I knew he agreed with Sam's orders regarding Bella, so I had nothing to say to him without testing my anger.

It was always so close to the surface these days. So easy to lose control.

I paused in front of my bedroom, hand on the door and asked with a tense jaw, "any calls for me?"

Why I was doing this to myself? There was little reason beyond morbid curiosity and self punishment. It didn't matter if Bella had called or not. I was forbidden from contacting her.

Not until I had my temper fully restrained.

But I figured if Bella had to be hurt because of my actions even if it was to keep her safe, the least I could do was hurt along side her.

It was pathetic, but it was all I had.

After consistent attempts, suddenly all contact from her had gone quiet since that day with the parasite trying to attack her.

Even thinking about it made me vibrate in fury before I took a deep breath to calm down.

But I considered the possibility that she was occupying herself with something other than worrying about me, which would be a good thing- she struggled enough as it was.

Or maybe she was terrified after seeing the pack in wolf form, and hiding at home.

Although, she never did have an especially evolved sense of self preservation.

Sometimes to the point of stupidity, if her dating and having her heart broken by that parasite ex-boyfriend was anything to go off of.

The brief thought of that leech with its hands on her made my stomach turn and I repelled the thought from me in disgust.

I noticed suddenly that Dad had been unusually quiet behind me. I half turned toward him, a frown marring my face.

"Dad?"

He eyed me blankly for a moment, and then sighed.

"Sit down for a second."

I did and watched him cautiously as he searched for the right words to say.

"I'm aware you think Bella is your imprint-"

"I know she is. If I'd just had a chance to look properly at her when-"

"Jake. Listen for a moment. I know you think she's your imprint, and I don't know if she is or not, but I thought you should know that Charlie called me..."

I huffed in irritation at everyone's refusal to take my word when I said I knew she was mine. I'd felt so strongly so quickly about her- it had to be that she was my imprint and I met her before I shifted.

Dad had largely kept information on Bella to the barest minimum to prevent temptation, so if he was bringing it up now before I had the all clear from Sam, it had to mean something big.

My thoughts shifted to all the unpleasant possibilities and worry curled in my gut.

"Is she okay?"

Dad watched me blankly once more for a moment, before his face shifted wearily and he rubbed his jaw.

"She's missing," he admitted.

I felt my control over my shift waver tenuously in response to the rising tension. My body began to shake, and I clenched my fists into the sofa beneath me.

Anger descended over me as I practically snarled at my Dad, "what do you mean missing?! Since when?"

He didn't answer for a moment, cautiously assessing my ability to stay in human form.

"Answer me!"

"Since Saturday. Charlie said she was going to call a friend to arrange a study session that day. He went out to go fishing with Harry, came back that evening and she wasn't there. He waited a couple hours before calling the friend's house but according to them, Bella never arranged anything. He reported her as missing straight away but there's been nothing so far."

I felt the fabric I was gripping tear, and released it, standing abruptly to pace as I clenched and unclenched my fist. I ruthlessly held onto my control in order to gain the answers I needed.

"Were we the last ones to see her then?"

"That's how things are looking."

My nails were digging harshly into my palms. I could feel the skin repeatedly break and heal under them each time I tensed. The length of my stride ate up the room quickly and I was forced to turn every few steps.

I probably resembled a pacing animal, but I was beyond caring.

Goddam it, I should have gone to see her regardless. It hadn't been a direct order from Sam not to see her, but with the risk of revealing the pack's existence to her if I lost my nearly non-existent control and shifted, I hadn't been able to justify a visit.

But she was more important to me than the secrecy of werewolves. She already knew about the parasites for Christ's sake, it wasn't like she was going to have a breakdown and squeal if we told her that we were monsters too.

I mentally kicked myself for cutting contact. I had listened to the others when they said it was for the best for the time being, and now she was missing.

I didn't kid myself that it was a coincidence she'd been in that clearing, alone, shortly after finding out that I was 'all better' from my 'virus'. She'd been looking for it with me for some time, and had continued without me.

I didn't want to blame Sam and my Dad, but a part of me was furious with them.

"We need to find her Dad! Anything could have happened to her out there. God, what if she's been found by the leech that's been running around recently? And we thought we smelt another one in the forest that day. We followed it to a river but by the time we got there whatever it was, was gone. What if it had her? What if-"

"Jacob! Calm down, son. You're one wrong thought away from shifting. Take a deep breath and hold on a minute, before you go tearing outta here searching for her and getting yourself caught as a wolf by a ton of people."

My whole body was shaking with barely contained tension. He was right, I needed to calm down fast.

Doing as I was told, I took a deep breath through my teeth and exhaled, repeating a few times until I was sure I wasn't about to lose myself.

"That's good, you're getting better at that a lot quicker than any of us figured."

At my withering glare, he raised his palms in supplication and continued, "Charlie already guessed she went missing in the woods. There was a search party starting today. A bit of prodding from Sam has given them as close a start as they could hope from where she was last seen by you boys. There's nothing more you can do Jake."

"Yes there is! We could search a hell of a lot quicker as wolves than any search part- wait... Sam? When did Sam find out Bella was missing? ...When did you find out?"

I looked disbelievingly as Dad grimaced with reluctance and guilt. Now that I thought about it, it was weird that Sam hadn't been a wolf at the same time as me for a couple of days, especially with the consistent hassle from the bloodsucker.

I hadn't noticed anything at the time, but my focus had all been on the red headed leech and anger over Bella.

Fury rose in the face of my suspicions and the urge to change almost overwhelmed me. I clung onto my current form with my fingertips, "how long have you both known!"

The demand came out as an almost sub vocal growl, and my skin rippled restlessly.

"Since Sunday," Dad admitted grudgingly, watching my skin with wary eyes.

I snarled loudly, forcing my legs to take me outside before I allowed myself to lose control. I was nearly overtaken with rage. I wanted to hurt something.

I wanted to tear my Alpha apart for intentionally keeping this from me.

It wasn't until I spotted a figure exiting a house that I realised where I had been heading in my red haze.

Rather than slowing down though, I sped up, baring my teeth in a snarl. Before the other could react, I had slammed into them and thrown them headlong into the trees.

I at least had clarity to know to keep this away from where others could see.

The moment Sam shifted, I could hear him in my head, but his words held no meaning to me in my clouded state of mind.

Instead, I bared my teeth once more and charged.

We met in a clash of teeth and claws and limbs as we rolled over and over, both trying to gain the upper hand.

Growls and snarls echoed and were amplified around us, snapping teeth barely missed vital areas.

I finally dug my teeth into a sizeable section of my Alpha's shoulder and bit down harshly. A satisfying yelp left Sam's mouth, but before I could enjoy any kind of victory, Sam used his greater size and experience to pin me to the ground underneath him.

Teeth wrapped around my throat and the pressure of his powerful jaws restricted my already laboured breathing.

~ **Yield!** ~ Burrowed its way past my anger and planted itself in my mind. Like my strings were cut, I relaxed back into the ground beneath me and allowed my head to sag to the side, baring my neck in submission.

It was only with a clearer mind that I became present to my Alpha's own anger and disappointment with me. My tail curled up as I whined involuntarily, part of me apologetic for attacking him, but another part furiously kicking against my instincts to submit - demanding penance for the lies of omission.

Whilst he caught his breath, Sam carefully followed my train of thoughts to the cause of my attack. I knew when he had found it, because he released my neck as his thoughts expressed a mixture of disgruntled irritation and forgiveness.

As I rolled over onto my feet, I found myself both grateful and resentful for his forgiveness. I still felt wronged. He should have told me as soon as he found out Bella was missing.

That the girl I loved was probably in danger and I hadn't known thanks to Sam left a bitter taste in my mouth.

I could have been searching for her days ago. It would be more difficult now that days had gone by, the trail possibly having been washed away entirely.

He didn't have the right to deny me searching for her. She was my imprint!

If it was Emily who had gone missing the pack would have been searching day and night for her.

The unequal treatment between the people we loved rankled. But more than that, it hurt.

Not for the first time, I wished that I had never become a werewolf. Before that, my greatest concerns had been how to make Bella reciprocate my feelings, looking after my Dad, my grades, my friends, and what I was going to do after school.

~Jacob.~ Sam's voice rang through my mind, interrupting my thoughts. I experienced brief flash of shame at my thoughts about Sam's imprint, which he heard certainly heard, but I felt too justified for it to stick.

~I've already searched the area Bella went missing in. The rain that night washed it all away. There was nothing there to track.~

Though slightly mollified at Sam's actions, I was still irritated. It should have been me looking too. He shouldn't have kept that from me. At least one of us could have continued looking for her- after all, maybe something new had turned up.

The idea that something important could have been missed because of Sam made me snarl, but his responding growl had me quiet again.

~I want to continue trying to track her at night in case the search party misses something I could notice by scent. They won't know to look for signs of vampires. They're missing half the story~ I insisted.

Sam's sigh echoed through my mind ~No, Jacob.~

My hackles rose immediately ~Why not!? You don't have the right to deny me the search for my imprint!~

~She's not your imprint!~ He snapped ~Not now and maybe not ever. We can't afford to be running around in the same area as the search party. Not as wolves. I need all our focus on keeping out the parasite that's been trying to get past us.~

He couldn't do this to me! She had gone missing in our territory with vampires in the area. It was our job to keep people safe from them. Especially Bella.

~Did you at least check the river? That weird scent we came across lead there. And we thought we heard something before we got to it.~

~I ran the whole length of the river on both sides in our territory. I'd planned to anyway, to see if we could find where it had come from. I arrived there too late. The rain had already gotten to it. There's nothing left to do for now Jacob.~

I couldn't accept that. I had to find out for myself. Search the entire area just in case. She couldn't just be missing. I was a werewolf for God's sake! I wasn't supposed to be as helpless as everyone else in these situations!

What was the point of this strength, the healing, the powerful senses and speed, if I couldn't even protect the girl I loved?

I resolved to do everything I could to find her. Anything less than that and I didn't deserve to have her. Not as a friend and not as something more.

~No Jacob.~ Sam commanded, interrupting my thoughts ~You will not spend your time as a wolf searching for her.~

Disbelieving that he would ask this of me, I readied myself to argue.

~ **No! That was an order.** ~

The will of my Alpha thundered through me- demanded nothing less than complete obedience. I whined in distress and sunk to the floor in the face of it, bowing my head.

The reality of what was occurring jolted my mind. I could do nothing. I was stuck waiting for the police to find what superior werewolf senses hadn't been able to. It was a hopeless situation and already I was grieving for Bella; a large part of me convinced only I would be able to find her.

I closed my eyes, as if to hide from the desolation choking me. More than ever I despised being a werewolf; giving me the knowledge and capability to help Bella, but forcing me to do nothing.

I would rather have worried in ignorance of werewolves and vampires. I could have been there with her that day if this had never happened to me.

I felt multiple presences in my mind as the rest of the pack shifted into wolves, and without another thought I went from four legs to two.

I didn't want to deal with their uncensored comments and opinions about it all.

Without another glance at my Alpha, I turned and walked into the trees to take the long way home.

My head bowed to the ground, as I seethed in the face of my own weakness. Since I had first turned I had bucked under the oppressive leadership of Sam Uley, but this was the first time I hated him.

There had to be something I could do. I couldn't accept just carrying on life as though she wasn't missing.

She could be hurt. Suffering. Waiting for me. The image of Bella trapped and pleading for help as I sat there doing nothing ran through my head.

I had made a promise to Bella and I intended to keep it, whatever it took. The idea of abandoning her to whatever horrible fate had happened to her physically revolted me.

I felt lost- facing a problem I had no idea how to solve, without anyone to help and active obstruction from the people I relied on the most, and likely with a time limit of undetermined length. If it hadn't run out already.

What if she was dead? I tried to deny the thought, but it taunted me. The idea of coming across Bella's body, ripped open by vampires and abandoned to the animals, refused to leave my mind and left me feeling sick.

If she was dead, the last thing she'd think of me was that I had chosen not to see her. I knew how damaged she was. How insecure. She probably thought I didn't care about her. She'd have died feeling so alone because of me.

Tears sprung to my eyes and I stumbled to my knees, emptying my stomach onto the dirt. I stayed like that for some time, breaths heaving and squeezing my eyes shut to prevent more tears.

I was pathetic. She wasn't dead. Whilst I knelt there torturing myself with images of her, I could be looking for her, instead of being useless.

Wiping my mouth with my arm, I staggered to my feet and calmed myself as much as I could with deep even breaths.

I continued walking, lost in my own thoughts, suffering under my own inability to act, as I failed to think of a way around Sam's edict.

Time lost meaning to me as a walked and I was only just aware that I had missed my night patrol. I didn't care. Not tonight.

It wasn't until the birds' incessant chirping all around me and the faintest hint of orange in the sky brought me out of my internal obsessing, that I realised I had somehow been walking all night.

My stomach growled demandingly, my mouth tasted disgusting with a thick film on my tongue and my head was fuzzy with exhaustion. I hadn't had anything to eat or drink since the afternoon, shortly before the leech had tried to get past Jared and Paul during their patrol and they'd howled for us as backup.

The trees thinned in front of me and I vaguely recognised the house I could spot through them.

Lights shone through the windows of the house, and I had already walked up to the door and knocked, before I realised three things.

1\. I was Bella's house

2\. I was spattered with vomit

3\. I was still naked

The door opened before I could make a tactical retreat.

I stood there, blushing bright red in mortification, as Charlie stared at me with eyebrows raised higher on his face than I thought possible, his eyes wide and his jaw practically gaping in shock.

A few seconds passed with us staring at each other awkwardly. Or maybe only awkwardly on my part- Charlie seemed to be temporarily broken. I shifted uncomfortably, and avoided eye contact before things could get weird... well, weirder.

"Um... hi Charlie," I stuttered, my voice raw from exhaustion and the emotional upheaval I'd been under for hours, "Don't suppose I could come in? And maybe borrow your shower?...and some clothes I guess."

Charlie seemed to choke on garbled words for a moment, before he abruptly snapped his head to left and avoided looking at me. He cleared his throat and stepped away from the door to let me in.

"Jesus kid... what in God's name- actually I don't think I want to know. Just get inside before I arrest you for public indecency. Folks don't need all that to be the first thing they see in the morning." Charlie's nose wrinkled in distaste as I walked past in response to a waft of puke, overheated by my high body temperature, meeting him.

"Shower. Now." He said firmly.

I scowled at him affronted, covering my concern over his wellbeing. He looked haggard now that I could see him properly.

His face was pale and drawn, with heavy bags under his eyes. His clothes were creased and I guessed that he'd slept in them. From the looks of his greasy hair and his heavy five o clock shadow, he needed a clean almost as much as I did.

I didn't say anything about his state though. From my years of knowing him, I could already tell that Charlie didn't respond comfortably to overt statements or gestures of worry, concern or affection.

Not from anyone but Bella. Although even with gestures from her his response was more often awkward than not, from what she'd told me.

At the reminder of Bella and her disappearance my breath hitched in pain, but I gamely kept it from showing on my face and approached the stairs to take a shower.

Charlie generally responded better to levity than deep emotion, and even though it was a little difficult for me, it was the least I could do for him whilst I figured out what I was doing here.

* * *

 **(Charlie pov)**

It was pointless to flick through the case file I already knew from heart like I was doing, looking hopelessly for a new sign or clue, anything, that would point me in a direction to go in. Something that would indicate Bella was okay, or even that she was alive- that was my worst nightmare, that my baby girl was gone forever.

I would rather find out she'd run away to get married to a stranger than find out she was dead.

I prayed continuously to a God I'd never been certain existed that she was safe. I prayed for her to come home. I prayed for a way to find her.

When Renée had left me I thought I'd known heartbreak then. When my parents had died shortly after that, I thought I knew loss. But the idea of my Bella, the tiny sweet girl I'd held in my arms when she was born and promised to protect, dead and lost to me had me half out of my mind in terror.

I didn't think I'd survive that.

Although what I dreaded just as much, if not more, was never knowing what happened to her. Just another missing teen. I knew myself well enough that it'd kill me just as much as Bella dead, but it'd be a slow death for me, filled with year after year of hoping fruitlessly that one day I'd find out what happened to her.

I hunched over the report and swallowed thickly, before reaching over to the glass of whisky in front of me and chucking it back, not bothering to savour it.

I was just drinking to burn the images out of my head. I had to focus, which was difficult enough with only two hours sleep whilst bent over in my chair earlier.

Just as I placed the glass on the table, someone knocked on the door. My eyebrows scrunched in confusion. Who in the hell was knocking at my door at this time of- I checked the clock on the wall- morning?

Upon opening the door, I froze. It took a second to register what I was looking at and then another to believe my own eyes.

There was a very tall, very muscular, very naked Jacob Black in front of me. Flecked in what looked like puke. I blinked, just in case that would clear things up- although actually I might have blacked out for a split moment, I was too tired to tell which one it was.

My mind was blank, as my brain scrambled to recall what the socially acceptable thing to do in this scenario was and came up with nothing.

Jacob shifted his weight from one foot to another and ducked his head.

"Um... hi Charlie." Christ was that his voice? It was a heck of a lot deeper than I remembered. I'd not seen him too long ago. That couldn't be normal right?

"Don't suppose I could come in? And maybe borrow your shower?...and some clothes I guess."

Right. I could answer that. He'd definitely just asked some questions I could answer yes or no to. I opened my mouth, but the transition from my brain to my mouth seemed to malfunction thanks to a combination of whisky, exhaustion and shock, resulting in a series of incomprehensible noises.

Right. That didn't work out- oh God I was still staring at him and he was naked. I quickly looked at the nearest interesting thing I could find- apparently a dirt smear on the doorframe- and stepped back to let him in while I tried to find my words.

"Jesus kid... what in God's name- actually I don't think I want to know. Just get inside before I arrest you for public indecency. Folks don't need all that to be the first thing they see in the morning."

As Jake walked into the house, a rancid wave seemed to punch me in the face. Yep, that was puke. I managed to stop the physical recoil, but couldn't stop the distaste showing.

Well, the kid was covered in sick, he could hardly blame me. And along those lines, there was no way he was sitting on my furniture like that.

"Shower. Now."

He scowled at me in response to my command and seemed to almost haughtily stalk up the stairs, muttering about folks being lucky to have a sight like that greet them first thing.

I groaned and massaged my forehead. Teenagers.

After the kid had finished using up all my hot water, I leant him the largest shirt I owned and my only pair of shorts. He thanked me by telling me I stank and had to take a shower too. Brat.

It was nearly an hour after he had first knocked on my door, after both showers-mine cold- and having finished the last of the dubiously edible leftovers- the little that Jake had left me when he was through with it whilst I was in the shower- we sat down across from each other at the table.

My fingers itched to continue flicking through the case file, but I resisted. I wasn't really supposed to have it at home at all, but no one had made a move to stop me as long as it got me to have a few hours sleep in my own house.

I bit my tongue to stop myself from asking Jake if he was on steroids- the amount he had bulked up in such a short amount of time couldn't be natural- I didn't have the energy to deal with the consequences if the answer was yes.

Besides, I'd seen a couple of the other kids on the Rez once they got a little older than Jacob. The families who lead the community in particular, I'd noticed, seemed to recently have had kids who shot up and out scarily fast.

Maybe it was something in the water.

It didn't really matter in the end.

"What are you doing here Jake?"

He swallowed and watched his hands intensely as he answered, "I- I heard Bella was missing."

I cleared my throat roughly, "yeah. Since Saturday."

The silent accusation I'd tried to keep out of my tone managed to slip through regardless and the kid winced in response.

"I didn't- no one told me. I didn't know until last night."

I felt my eyes squinting at him as I regarded him sceptically, "Billy didn't tell you?"

"No. Not until I got home last night." He glanced at me briefly, but didn't seem capable of maintaining eye contact, and returned his gaze to his hands.

"Too busy with your friends hm?" This time I'd managed to withhold the accusation in my voice, the words more than made up for it though.

Jake seemed to shrink in front of me, his head ducked to look at his lap. Aw damn it, I knew he was just a kid- a dumb teenage boy- who was no more or less self-centred and irresponsible as the next one, but I couldn't help but feel angry with him.

"You really hurt her Jacob." I stated softly. His shoulders curled inward.

"I know." He whispered, shame thick in his voice.

"You saw how difficult she finds it to do the most basic things sometimes. That boy she dated did some real damage to her before he left. You saw that. Didn't you." I heard the volume of my words gradually rising as I spoke, but the ringing in my ears that was the bitter fury I had suppressed for months stopped me from caring.

"Yes."

"You're not stupid kid. You're young, but I know you're not stupid. So you knew what you were taking on when you became her friend. She trusted you dammit! She _trusted_ you. _I_ trusted you with her. To be there for her."

"I- I know I messed up Charlie-"

"Damn right you did! You might have seen her struggling, but you're weren't there in the months after that- that _boy_ left her curled up and practically catatonic for _months_. Months Jacob! She wouldn't speak, she wouldn't eat, she wouldn't shower. She barely remembered to get dressed without prompting. You don't know what it's like as a father to have to watch the most important person in my life suffer like that and be able to do _nothing_!

But _you_ , you could! She let you in and I trusted you to help her. To be there when she needed you. So where were you Jake! Where-Were-You!" I slammed my fist on the table in frustration.

The quiet that followed my yelling was almost painful. I was being unfair to him and I knew it. It wasn't just that he'd let her down that was fuelling my anger. I was jealous. For months I had floundered and failed to get through to Bella. I had watched, impotently, as she was devoured in her silent suffering.

Nothing I said or did seemed to reach her. My love and support as a parent didn't seem to be enough for her- and that hurt. I suffered alongside her, whilst containing the rage that had no direction in the absence of the boy who had caused this.

My naturally withdrawn nature hindered every effort I made. I didn't have the ability to be unreserved and consistent in my affections like she seemed to need, and it was like I'd failed as a father. Jacob on the other hand lived with each emotion he experienced shining through his every gesture and expression.

As thankful as I was that he had done that for her, I was resentful too. That he had caused such a drastic change in her where I had had no effect, had been both bitterly difficult and wonderful to see.

So when I saw him squander an ability I coveted, I couldn't help but be infuriated. It wasn't right to blame him for so much. He was a kid, of course he was going to mess up, and it wasn't his fault Bella was missing. But the silently building outrage, and despair over my little girl's mental state for months had finally boiled over in the face of my own overwrought and exhausted brain.

A soft noise disrupted my thoughts. My eyes focused on Jake's face- what little I could see of it with his face lowered till his chin touched his chest. As I watched, small droplets of water dripped off his lashes and onto his lap. His shoulders- hunched inward- shook in time to his hushed and shaky breaths. Tiny, broken noises escaped his throat.

I softened at the sight. Damnit, this was all such a mess. I sighed in defeat, rubbing my palm tiredly on my forehead.

I got up, grabbed a glass, filled it with water and placed it down in front of Jacob. He flinched slightly when I placed my hand on his shoulder, but his chest softened its heaving, quiet cries.

I cleared my throat awkwardly, "I'm not going to say it's alright Jake, because I'm still mad at you. But I shouldn't have shouted at you like that."

His breath stuttered briefly, before he shook his head in denial and continued to sob softly.

"Hey. Hey kid," I crouched beside him so I could see his face, fighting a wince at the protest from my knees, "look at me Jake."

After a moment, Jacob reluctantly turned his face toward me to make eye contact. His face was a mess of tears and snot, his eyes bloodshot and the lids were puffy. He was clearly biting harshly on the inside of his cheek to quiet his cries.

His entire pitiful expression was drowning in guilt and shame. I felt a reflection of that settle into my stomach.

"It's not your fault she's missing Jacob. You know that right? Whatever you did or didn't say, whatever you did or didn't do, it's not on your shoulders that she's gone."

"It is." He clearly wanted to say more, but all that his throat seemed to be able to squeeze out was a small hoarse, "I'm sorry, Charlie."

I gave a grim smile and squeezed his arm lightly, "It's not me you owe an apology to kid. Now, unless you physically kidnapped Bella, or arranged it yourself, no one in their right mind would blame you. You had nothing to do with it. Right?"

Jake gave a single miserable nod, self recrimination still fighting its way onto his face.

"Right. Blaming yourself isn't going to bring Bella back, and it's not going to help anyone find her quicker. All it does is eat you up inside and pull you away from anyone who could help you or vice versa. Trust me, I know."

An idea sparked itself in my mind. I could tell that left alone, all Jacob would do was bury himself in guilt. He needed to be productive. Preferably something that would make him feel like he was helping to find Bella.

"I'll tell you what you can do though."

Jake look at me with questioning hope, and I knew my guess had been correct.

"You can help me keep the search for her alive. If she's not found in the next week or two, interest will die out and eventually people will forget about her. Now I don't plan on letting that happen. I'd appreciate any assistance I can get to keep people looking for her, whatever it takes. Are you up for that?"

Something hesitant seemed to settle onto Jacob's face briefly before his expression changed to thoughtful and considering. He began to nod slowly as he apparently came to a revelation and he lit up, "I can do that. I want to help look for her however I can."

I squeezed his arm once more, satisfied, before I stood with a groan and stretched.

"You can take the sofa after you've cleaned yourself up. We've got three hours to sleep before I have to get up for the search party. You up for coming along?"

For once I ignored the responsible whisper in my head that reminded me it was a school week.

"Yeah. I'm free till the evening. And Charlie?"

"Hm?"

"Thanks." Jake flushed slightly and I could tell he was embarrassed at the display of vulnerability he'd shown to me.

I could probably have reassured him that it was alright and that I wasn't going to tell anyone, but my word quota for the month had more than been used up, and frankly my throat was sore from excessive speaking.

That, and if he was going to be hanging around to help search for Bella, there were inevitably times where we were going to butt heads- he was a teenager after all, and not a quiet restrained one like my little girl- I was going to need some blackmail to make him behave.

"Sure." I grunted, retreating upstairs to try to get the equivalent of a full night's rest out of three hours, so that I could search for my daughter tomorrow.

As I passed her bedroom I paused, looking into the room as if expecting her to be in bed, muttering in her sleep as she tossed and turned, her face crumpled with distress like she had every night since September.

My expression tightened at the empty room, and my chest felt hollow. I was going to find her no matter what it took, or how long I had to keep looking.

* * *

 _All done! A little shorter than the last chapter. Poor Jacob. Poor Charlie. How far do you think circumstances will force Charlie and Jacob to go to find her?_

 _How do you think Charlie and Jacob's relationship toward each other will progress?_

 _What do you think will happen with Victoria? As I said before, I'm welcome to all guesses and questions. I like to use them as ideas for my plot. Already one reviewer's guess has caused me to make major plot changes from the ideas it gave me!_


	3. Dead woman walking

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the general plot and OCs

Heya everyone! So first thing I want to do is inform everyone reading that I will try to get one or two more chapters in the next few days, before it'll have to slow right down, at least for a little bit, thanks to work load for summer exams. I'll still keep writing. Just, you know, slower.

Secondly, I wanted to make sure y'all know that when writing vampire speech for Bella, sometimes she almost stammers like she would if she were a human, but her thoughts and reactions are fast enough that she catches herself, resulting in a very brief disruption in her speech that would be obvious only to those with superior hearing. I write it like this "Yeah I- see what you mean, that's- cool."

Thirdly, I experienced big sections of this chapter as a bit of a chore to write. It's essentially an info dump chapter for Bella, and I don't like it but couldn't bear to work on it any more to make it more interesting. It's a really important chapter so I couldn't skip it. I also use some info in it from Twilight wiki and either copy sentences or rephrase it to fit better.

Penultimately, to address a couple concerns; there is a happy ending planned. Edward will definitely get together with Bella, and although an important element, it is most certainly not the main focus of the story (doesn't mean he won't be going on his own journey). I have the majority of the plot planned now, but I'm still open to suggestions and there are few characters who I'm largely completely uncertain about what they'll be doing beyond the end goal for them.

Finally, almost this entire chapter was inspired by a HUGE plot divergent that smacked me out of no where after orchidluv's first review contained some guesses that got me thinking. Initially this was going to be my favourite anglophobic Kate lovin' vamp. So thank you! If one of your reviews (LRK860 and imlovinfanfic) inspires a particular chapter or plot point I'll point it out when I get to it. Special thanks to jansails' awesomeness after I released Ch1.

As always- no beta= inevitable mistakes + sorry + inner grammar nazi self loathing

* * *

 **(Bella pov)**

 _I took a fraction of a second to notice the unusually quiet animals around me, and the sweet smell that I instinctively knew belonged to one like me._

 _There was no time at all between noticing this, and the defensive crouch I slid into, a snarl on my lips._

 _There was a barely discernible pause, before I sensed a presence approach from my left._

 _I whipped my head around with a warning hiss, just as the other vampire came into view._

" _Well hello. This is not a sight you see everyday," the vampire purred._

 _Red eyes clashed with mine and I prepared to attack._

"Careful, Bella." Teddy warned in my head, making me hesitate, "This isn't a fight you're likely to win."

At those words I mentally took a step back, and assessed the man in front of me. He seemed relaxed at first glance, but at a closer look I could identify the tightly coiled tension that was barely visible in his stance. He was ready to move in a split moment in response to an attack.

His eyes were a rose red. I suspected he was freshly fed and at the peak of strength.

Teddy was right- I didn't really know the first thing about fighting, beyond what my instincts demanded of me.

I could easily lose my life by attacking, if he had anything more than the zero experience I could attest to.

In response to my hesitation, the vampire's lips quirked slightly. I got the sense that he approved.

He tilted his head to the side, his dark shoulder length hair tumbling over his shoulder gracefully, "easy little Newborn, I have no intention of killing you, yet."

I noticed the unfailingly polite and calm tone he spoke in, as well as his chalky olive complexion- for some reason, that seemed far more strange to me than it should be.

"Yet?" I questioned warily. If he tried to kill me, I knew my greatest chance of survival would be to run.

He straightened up, his hands casually held behind his back, and his eyes roved me. Had he contained a hint of lasciviousness in his face I would have growled, but as it was he seemed merely perplexed and curious.

A small furrow appeared momentarily in between his brows.

"Where is your maker little Newborn?" He inquired, ignoring my previous question entirely.

I faltered, "I don't have one. At least not that I remember."

There was a pause lasting only a second, but during which I suspected hundreds of thoughts sped through his mind- everything in his demeanour radiated a cool, amiable politeness.

A small smile appeared on his face, and he bowed his head slightly, "how irresponsible of them, my apologies. I suppose then, that so far your life as a Newborn has not had any guidance?"

The knowledge of Teddy's voice flashed through my mind, but I resolved not to tell him. I somehow doubted that was the norm, and I didn't want to appear as a threat any more than I had already done.

"I don't know how long a vampire is considered a- Newborn for, but I haven't met any others like me since I- woke up." I said. The danger appeared to have passed, for now, and I allowed myself to relax enough to stand up.

"I see. Here, take my cloak. If anyone sees you, you will catch a lot of attention like that." Each movement, as he unclasped his cloak and swept it off his shoulders, was elegant and fluid enough to look more like one single, graceful gesture.

To my surprise he held it open for me to step into. I hesitated, but what would be the point of tricking me like that? After all, it was quite likely that I had little to no chance if he chose to be violent.

Deciding to take the offer as innocuous, I turned my back to him and allowed him to drape it over me as I slipped my arms into it.

I was thankful that he stepped back afterward, so that I could fasten the clasps myself.

As though the clothing offered a layer of protection, I faced him, feeling slightly more comfortable.

"Thank you." I smiled, a hint of tension likely still apparent in my expression.

He dipped his chin, the polite tilt of his lips once more adorned his face, "no need my lady, it was remiss of me not to offer before. Allow me to introduce myself, my name is Demetri."

If I could have blushed I probably would have. I bet he was very popular with the ladies when he turned that suave charm up.

"My name is Bella. I don't remember anything else." I admitted, feeling vulnerable in my lack of knowledge about myself.

"How unfortunate, but not uncommon," he mused, "come then. I will take on the responsibility of teaching you what you need to know. It would be best to follow me to where I am staying. You will likely have questions, and I need to ensure you have enough control not kill everyone before I can allow you to roam freely."

Demetri turned without another word, assured that I would be behind him.

"Teach me?" I asked dubiously. I had been doing well teaching myself, I thought. Surely I didn't need help.

He looked patiently amused when looked over his shoulder at me, "Yes. There are laws to follow about being a vampire, unless you want the royal guards chasing you down. They do not care if you are ignorant of the rules, you still have to follow them, and it is the responsibility of the vampires who know them to pass them on."

"Oh." This surprised me for some reason, even when almost everything that had happened so far to me hadn't.

"Come with me, Bella," he held his hand out, wearing that distant smile.

As I slowly placed my hand in his- still unsure if this was the right thing to do, but not knowing what other action to take without Teddy's input- a thought occurred to me.

"Demetri, where are we? And where exactly are we going?"

The curl of his mouth twitched into something a bit more genuine as he answered, "La Meseta de Cacaxtla. We are going to my house in Mazatlán"

My eyes widened, "That's- not English."

"No. It is not," he replied mirthfully, "we are in Mexico."

"Mexico," I repeated, in shock.

"Yes, Bella," he chuckled, "now come. It is less than fifteen minutes away."

He gave my hand a gentle tug, before allowing it to slip from his grasp, and began to run. I easily kept up with him, despite being caught off guard by how far I'd managed to travel.

Although I wasn't sure why I was so surprised, considering that although I swam slower than I ran, and my pace had been lazy, I had still been moving almost constantly for weeks.

Demetri caught my hand once more as we approached a city, watching my reaction out of the corner of his eye. I frowned at him and attempted remove myself from his grasp.

"I won't go on a blood fuelled rampage you know. I have enough control for that. I've been practicing since after I first drank blood." I argued defensively.

Nevertheless he pulled me closer, "forgive me if I am unwilling to risk that you overestimate your abilities just yet, it is just that I have never seen a Newborn with quite so much control as you. I am reluctant to test you too much in an uncontrolled environment."

I reluctantly understood, however I still felt the need to insist, "I've never lost control enough to drink from anyone."

We arrived at his house just as I spoke, and my eyes widened. It was fairly large, but that wasn't what impressed me- it was the design. It was stunning, and with a simple but elegant shape- all curved lines and crisp edges, seeming to nestle brightly between the vegetation which had clearly been carefully planted to seem wild but controlled.

The building was made up of a pale stone, with a colorful mosaic giving it vibrancy. I could hear water trickling behind the house, and immediately knew the garden would be as beautiful as the house.

The entire thing seemed isolated and yet I could see the sea not far off and hear the city without difficulty.

"You live here?" I asked incredulously, as he guided me through the front door.

The inside was a just as stunning as the outside, with large open spaces and light colors. Filled with comfortable looking furniture, plants and artwork.

I loved it.

He gave a noncommittal hum and walked ahead of me, "sometimes. I travel a lot for work, and it is easier to stay near my employers most of the time. This is more a home away from home for me."

"This is where you take women then," I accused without thinking. The moment I realised what I'd said to a virtual stranger I clapped my mouth shut, embarrassed.

A surprised bark of laughter escaped him and he stopped to look at me, "quite. Do not worry Bella, I hold no designs for you like that."

Before I could decide if I was glad about that or if I was hurt that I wasn't deemed attractive enough for Demetri's notice, he indicated to a door on his right.

"This is your room for the duration of your stay. Make yourself at home; depending on how much you need to learn, you could be here for a little while."

I nodded gratefully at him, and entered the room.

Like everything about this place, it was beautiful- airy and simplistic elegance, with a view of the front, including a peek of the sea through the greenery.

"Thank you, Demetri," I breathed, without turning from the windows.

"You are welcome, my lady. If you would excuse me, I have a few calls to make. Please, do not hesitate to come find me, when you are ready," came his almost formal reply, and then the door clicked quietly shut behind me, Demetri's footsteps tapping gently away.

I was a little overwhelmed at the drastic change, after weeks of being under the sea.

Everything was different- the colors contained more range, and greater clarity. The air moved past at a whisper, entirely dissimilar to the water, which was like a swathe of silk all around me. The comforting weight of the ocean pressing into me was gone, leaving me feeling too light in my limbs.

The sounds held a focus previously missing, taking so long to reach me and seemingly so delicate in their existence. The tastes in the air were less vivid but, like the colors, were numerous. They seemed more tangible and easier to identify in the water compared to out of it.

I was hyper aware of gravity holding me stationary to the floor in a manner entirely different to my experience of being in the ocean.

But the greatest change was smell; something that I forwent underwater, due to the discomfort of emptying and refilling my lungs with liquid. It was as acute- if not more so- than all of my other senses.

I was used to short periods of scenting the air, and only for the purpose of gaining control over my bloodlust. Such an extended amount of time left me aware of the sheer number of scents I could identify, from so many different directions and with so many different nuances to them.

I wasn't sure I liked it. Despite the fact that I had been yearning for some stimulation beyond what I could find at sea, a part of me was aching to return to the safety of its depths. Even the discomfort that came with lungs and stomach full of seawater was negligible to me after weeks of it.

I was so exposed above water, with so few places to truly hide from whatever may or may not be chasing me.

However, I had been practicing for weeks to be able to do this, Teddy hadn't discouraged me, and for all that we had just met, Demetri seemed like a fairly safe option to be taught what I couldn't find out by myself.

I resolved to stay, and learn from Demetri. After all, I didn't know if other vampires would be so friendly and receptive to me.

Taking a deep unnecessary breath, I walked determinedly out of the bedroom and went to find him. There was no point in delaying any further, it wasn't like I needed time to recuperate.

I followed the vague noises I could hear that sounded like Demetri speaking, until my investigation lead me to the garden.

He finished talking to whoever was on the end of the phone- clearly a vampire by the speed and volume.

Despite my nearly silent steps, Demetri could tell I was there and showed no surprise when he turned to me, the polite expression on his face that I was quickly coming to expect from him.

"I have just cancelled everything for a while, so I can ensure you are as ready as you can be by the time our journey together is complete."

"Woah. I..." I felt a pang of emotion in my chest. That was a lot for someone he had just met. What if I couldn't live up to his expectations for me?

"Thank you, Demetri. I can't believe you'd do that for me. But why? Surely it won't take too long for me to learn everything."

Demetri inclined his head in agreement, "For most Newborns it would require approximately a year, perhaps more, to gain enough clarity of thought around humans that the risk of them drinking from every blood source around become relatively minute. However, I saw no indication of struggle from you, no inclination to go toward the people who live nearby.

"That would not be so strange were you a normal Newborn with above average control of your thirst, who had recently eaten. But you have not recently eaten. By all rights you should have snapped the moment you scented them."

As he spoke we moved to stand by the fountain in his garden. I dipped my hand into the warm water- warm to me at least- and allowed to silken sensation running past my hand soothe me.

"But I have recently fed. Just a couple of hours ago."

Demetri shook his head, and shot an almost admiring glance in my direction. I had a feeling that were I still human, I'd have flushed and shifted uncomfortably.

"Not from a human. That should weaken your control when confronted with human blood."

My head whipped around to stare at him, "how did you know?"

"Your eyes. They have lightened to a dusky rose colour. They do not get like that from drinking human blood."

That was news to me- I had no idea my eyes were changing color. Come to think of it, I didn't even know what I looked like. Part of me insisted that I didn't care, but another part of me whispered insecurities in my ear.

What if I was utterly unremarkable as a vampire beyond flawless, pale skin that glittered in sunlight?

What if that was the real reason Demetri would not even consider me worth attempting to seduce?

I looked at my reflection in the water of the fountain, but the ripples prevented me from seeing anything more than a pale blur with brown hair.

"Tell me something, Bella," Demetri requested, pulling my focus back onto the conversation at hand.

"When you first awoke, how did you prevent yourself from finding the nearest human and draining them?" His tone was knowing, and although his smile didn't get bigger, the look in his eyes seemed to accentuate it more.

"I didn't." I admitted, confused as to why this was so important to him, "I just followed my instincts to the nearest large animal."

But by the way he regarded me, it meant something to Demetri that I wasn't getting, "I suspected as much, but to have it confirmed... I am very impressed." And he sounded it.

I wanted to refute the impressiveness of it, not finding what I had done-or not done- particularly special. It was thanks the water blocking my ability to smell humans at all when I became a vampire. It wasn't like I had been above ground the whole time, faced with temptation but choosing to ignore it.

If another Newborn been in my situation, they probably would have done the same 'miraculous' actions that I had.

But before I could do more than shake my head in negation he spoke again.

"How old are you exactly?"

"I think I'm eighteen."

Demetri made an amused sound in his throat, "I meant how long since you awoke as vampire."

"Oh." Thank God for my inability to blush. "Just over three weeks and thirteen hours."

Despite having been under the water for extended amount of time, losing myself in new discoveries, a part of me was always aware and keeping track of the time passing by.

"Fascinating. Less than a month old and you have the control of one with a decade of practice."

His gaze seemed to strip me of my skin and right down to my barest components, as though if he searched deep enough he could find the answers he was looking for. I avoided looking at him, uncomfortable and feeling oddly vulnerable.

Demetri noticed my discomfort, and seemed to gather himself, tucking away the intensity behind that polite and affable demeanour once more.

"My apologies, Bella. My curiosity has gotten the better of me once again," he smirked ruefully, "you will likely find once the years have gone by, that you rarely come across something truly new anymore. When I do discover something unique, I tend to forget my manners in my eagerness."

"It's alright," I assured, somewhat weakly, "I suppose I'm just experiencing something like the opposite of that; almost everything is new to me right now and I wish I could find more things familiar to find comfort in."

"Well," he dipped his head, "let me at least make your entrance into vampire life a little easier by explaining the laws one can be punished by the Volturi for breaking."

He paused briefly, as though expecting me to comment, and seemed to once more eye me with intensity when I merely waited for him to continue.

"Rest assured, there are few in number. Most of them are fairly common sense and are there to ensure the continued ignorance of our existence amongst the humans. You could probably guess some of them."

"I guess don't go out in sunlight in front of people, and don't leave too much evidence when hunting. Don't give away the secret or make people too suspicious when interacting with them. I can't think of anything else."

"Yes, those are three of the laws that are enforced by the Volturi; victims of hunts have to be unlikely to be missed, with no remains for humans to study, and territory should be changed often.

"Interaction between humans and vampires should not draw attention and vampires should not be noticed in open sunlight- if a human becomes aware of them, the vampire at fault would be responsible for silencing that human in whatever manner they deem necessary; usually through death or turning."

"Do you think that's what happened to me?" I asked.

Demetri appeared thoughtful when he answered, "I have a lot of ideas about what happened, Bella, based upon what I have inferred from you. However, much of it is supposition."

Upon seeing my disgruntled face he chuckled, "let me finish explaining the laws and I will share my thoughts with you."

I nodded my agreement, placated by his offer.

"Another one, is the responsibility a creator bears for his or her creation; that is the teaching and controlling of ones Newborn until they are ready for independence. Failure for this, which results in a Newborn breaking the law results punishment for both creator and Newborn.

"The newest law to be brought into existence by the Volturi was to forbid the creation of immortal children-"

"What are immortal children?"

"I would have thought they were fairly self explanatory," Demetri retorted drily.

I ducked my head, embarrassed, before realising he was just teasing me. It was a bizarre experience to be on the end of after his near perpetual politeness. Perhaps he was becoming more comfortable with me?

"They are children- usually toddlers- who have been turned. They are trapped, forever, in their childish forms. They never age mentally. They are denied the chance at any semblance of life that most people get. Forever dependant on others. In my opinion, they were more considered mascots to a coven, than truly loved, for their angelic beauty."

"That sounds horrible." I shuddered, "but surely some vampires bit children because they loved them?"

It was the first time I had seen a negative emotion from Demetri, but he appeared truly disgusted by the idea of someone turning a child.

"Perhaps they had convinced themselves they loved the child they turned. But I think it a most despicable and cruel action. Keeping in mind that the vast majority of immortal children were babes or very young children, it is an age during which a person is just beginning to form opinions and ideas of their own- to question the world around them at the most basic level.

"Yet it is also an age of tantrums and frustration, often due to an inability to properly communicate with others. Imagine, forever trapped in that state, at an age where you can think but not communicate, at an age where you can see and wonder, but not explore the world around you without another's permission. You cannot even control much of your own body. Any opinion or idea is never truly valid in the eyes of those who claim to love you, due to your youth.

"You hold no real value or use to the people who you depend on completely, beyond your sweet size, your stunning appearance, and the ego boost you give another to depend on them so utterly. You are a belonging, for eternity."

I felt horrified at the description given by Demetri. He was clearly passionate about the subject though. Almost excessively so. Why? Did he know someone who had created an immortal child? Had he witnessed all that first hand?

Something about his pained grimace prevented me from asking what was on my mind. After a moment he gave a slight shake of his head, and continued on without looking at me.

"I would like to say it was due to the ethical ramifications of their existence that immortal children were deemed illegal to create, harbour or even to withhold information about. However it was not. The tantrums from these children could level entire settlements, and they were incapable of self-control when it came to blood lust. They were a threat to exposure."

A hushed quiet settled over both of us, and I watched Demetri as he watched the rippling water of the fountain, lost in thought. It wasn't long, however, before he seemed to almost shrug the atmosphere from him and the familiar smile returned when he faced me.

"The final three are less to do with threats of exposure and more to do with Volturi preferences;

"Interaction with Children of the Moon, except for the purpose of extermination, is prohibited, due to one of our leaders almost losing his life after a close call with one many years back.

"Providing false witness to a crime, for whatever reason or even accidentally, is punishable.

"Hunting is forbidden in Volterra due to being the town of residence of the Volturi; their food is brought from outside, sometimes from quite far away. This allows them to remain there without risk.

"They are relatively simple and you'll find that they are rarely difficult to follow. Beyond that, you are generally free to choose whatever life you wish for yourself, forever more."

I was still perturbed by his description of immortal children, but had the presence of mind to ask questions. Hopefully they would distract me from the previous topic.

"What are Children of the Moon? That sounds like..." I didn't want to guess and sound silly if I was wrong.

Demetri confirmed my thoughts with a nod, "werewolves. They are in many ways similar to their fictional descriptions; they involuntarily change during the moon, during which they become raging wolf-like beasts that cannot control themselves.

"In that state they have the strength and speed to bring down a vampire. Silver bullets do not affect them however, and nor does vampire venom. They propagate like a vampire does, but can have children too who are not inflicted with the curse.

"They are just like another person outside of the full moon, apart from their invulnerability to vampire venom. There are few left now, having largely been hunted to near extinction by vampires in Europe and Asia- these being their largest communities once- over the centuries."

I frowned, thinking back on the smell of wolf I had come across back during my first day in this new life. It had certainly belonged to something that had screamed danger to my senses.

I couldn't imagine what else that could be. But I couldn't know for sure, and I didn't want to get in trouble for giving 'false witness'. Besides, Demetri had never told me what punishment each infraction got a vampire. That seemed like a fairly important aspect to know.

"You didn't tell me a the consequences for breaking any laws entailed." I told him.

He looked over at me, abruptly solemn, "the punishment for each of these laws not being upheld, is death- often for all involved. The Volturi do not take law breakers kindly."

I internally shivered at the words, suddenly glad I had asked before making my choice. But what if they were werewolves and I ended up somehow punished for not reporting them? Demetri would probably have the best advice for me, I decided.

Still, I hesitated. This was potentially my life on the line. How much did I trust Demetri? I pondered this, from our first interaction right up to this moment. So far he hadn't done anything to make me doubt him. In fact he had gone well out of his way to be accommodating to me.

Not only that, he had been respectful and courteous to me- I was still wearing his cloak as if to emphasise that statement. He had praised me for my control and shown a level of trust in me by bringing me to his home.

He didn't need to do any of those things. Not since he wasn't my creator. He had been unreasonably generous, and despite my lack of memories, I knew enough about people to be aware that it was a rare phenomenon between strangers.

Most of all, though, was that I didn't want to spend however long it took to teach me, with someone I refused to allow myself to trust. That decided it for me.

"Demetri..." I began uncertainly.

"Yes, Bella?" He asked, softly in response to my clear hesitance.

"When I first awoke... after I had fed at sea, I approached land. There was this smell. It frightened me, and it made me remember something too. Something from when I was human."

He nodded encouragingly. I mustered my courage and told him with more confidence.

"I remembered a pack of giant wolves. About the size of horses. It's blurry, but I'm fairly sure the memory was very shortly before I turned. I think they were what I was smelling. Everything in me said that they were a potential threat, and some part of me thought I had been hunted by something and that I still was, once I got close to land. It might have been the wolves."

His eyes widened in surprise, and his face creased in concentration as he thought deeply, "do you know where you were when you first became aware as a vampire?"

I shook my head regretfully, "not really. I think I got washed out to sea during my transformation. I never made it onto land to find out where I was, my instincts were telling me I was in danger.

"But I know it was fairly far North from here- I think it may have been Washington. Near the coast obviously, and the water was a lot colder. There were killer whales nearby- I fed from one of them. There were a lot of trees- they were bleached and strewn across the beach. It was grey and rainy. That's all I can remember about it, sorry."

Demetri waved off my apology, his whole being gleaming with interest, "no need to apologise. You have given me plenty to go off of. A wolf pack. How unexpected. But you were right to be wary- wolves and vampires are natural enemies. Had they found you they would have killed you.

"But there is little we can do about their existence right now. I would keep that to yourself if I were you. After you have gained control I can investigate this myself, and if I find something I will inform the Volturi, too. It would probably be best if you do not interact with the Volturi directly."

"Why's that?" I asked, mildly irritated that I was being underestimated, but grateful that he was taking me out of the firing line.

Demetri's answering laugh was dark and humourless, "much of the answer to that is for another time, when we can have a more in depth explanation of the Volturi and the way they work. For now, I will just say that along with any governing body, there is an unfortunate level of politics and power involved. I am afraid you, my lady, would both gain their attention and be woefully underprepared for the consequences of doing so."

I was disturbed at what he was saying, but also sceptical. There was nothing special about me that would interest them, beyond my strangely evolved control over my blood lust. What could possibly so attention grabbing that the Volturi as a whole would notice someone like me?

"Why? I'm just... Bella." Doubt was evident in my voice.

That intense look was back on Demetri's face, and I resisted the urge to do something other than make eye contact.

"There are a few things that I have managed to guess about you, since I first saw you, Bella. The first was that, due to the color of your eyes, you had either never tasted human blood- a remarkable feat even with a creator watching over you- or that you had swapped to animal blood some weeks ago. Since then, I have obviously confirmed the former.

"You do not understand how strong the instincts should have been for you, when you first became aware, to hunt for human blood specifically. Unless utterly starving, or told and trained otherwise by another vampire, animal blood is simply not supposed to appear appealing to a Newborn.

"But you were aware already, that it was an option. Not only that, there are elements of vampirism that you knew and were not surprised by- you showed no confusion over the Volturi, but did not know their laws. I would guess that you initially showed no surprise by other aspects of vampirism- your speed and strength perhaps, the way you glitter in the sun, that lack of need to breathe."

He was correct on all accounts and my eyes widened as he continued talking.

"These things, especially about the existence of the Volturi, are not just things you can stumble across. Someone had to have told you. Perhaps someone who exposed you to the ability to drink from animals, but not from humans. My guess is that an individual, or a coven, showed themselves to you, and then, they bit you, as they had to, to avoid punishment should the Volturi have discovered you.

"It could have been that they genuinely wanted you out of fondness, however I believe if that were the case they would have been there to claim you once you awoke. You certainly would not have found yourself alone out at sea. It is more likely, that they had grown actively hostile toward you and you somehow managed to escape. Perhaps they were distracted by the wolves."

I was momentarily speechless. That would explain why Teddy was uncertain if I was still being hunted- actively hostile, but no longer human to expose them. Why would they get close enough to me to tell me so much, and then turn on me like that though?

I resisted the urge to wrap my arms around myself. Was it that there was something wrong with me? What if they decided I wasn't worth the hassle to keep around? A Newborn sounded like a lot of work.

My mind was running in circles, trying to make sense of this information. I hated not knowing about myself. It made everything so confusing.

"Maybe they just decided I wasn't good enough, and that was why they didn't claim me," I muttered. Something in me seemed strangely convinced about that.

However Demetri shook his head with surprising surety, "no, that would not have been it."

"How do you know?"

"Because of the last thing I have guessed about you. This one I am fairly sure I am correct about. It is also the reason I would suggest you avoid the Volturi for as long as you can."

I almost didn't want to hear what he was about to say, but I knew that not hearing it wouldn't make it any less important or true.

"You have an extra ability- and something that draws other vampires in, is a vampire with a strong ability. It would also explain why a vampire, or a coven, explained so much to you as a human. If you showed potential as a human, they would have been eager, when they met you, to add you to their ranks.

"Perhaps they told you stories of vampire life to appeal to you, perhaps to threaten you to accept them prior to turning- it would make you easier to deal with as a Newborn. But I do not know.

"If there is one thing that is important in vampire society, it is power. And from the lack of surprise you are showing, you already knew about vampire abilities, which just adds credence to my guess of being preinformed due to your potential."

I squinted my eyes at him suspiciously, "What ability do you think I have? Super control? That sucks. Why would the Volturi be interested in me for that?"

Demetri laughed briefly, "no. You have a powerful mental barrier. I do not know if there is anything more to it than that. I have an ability myself you see; I'm a tracker. I can tune in to the tenor of anyone's mind no matter where they are and find them, as long as I have met them once. I am the most powerful tracker in the world. But you, Bella, are completely silent to me."

Something about this conversation was giving me incredible déjà vu. Had I already had one similar to this? That would make sense, if Demetri's hypothesis was correct. Great, I potentially had a vampire- or worse a coven of vampires- who maybe wanted to kill me, and maybe wanted to forcefully recruit me or I don't know what.

I yearned for the unworried freedom of the ocean once more. But I knew escaping back into it wouldn't make my problems go away- I'd just drag them with me.

"What's so special about a mental block that it would make the Volturi notice me?"

"What you have to understand, is that almost any potential ability is greatly enhanced by vampirism. If you were already showing it as a human, it should be many times more powerful or versatile as a vampire. The fact that you did not even know you were using it until now, but were doing it unconsciously anyway, and with such strength, means that if you find out what you can do with conscious control... well the Volturi would be incredibly threatened by that.

"Their whole structure is built by and dependant on many individuals with abilities of various forms of mental manipulation. No one has been able to negate their power in a long, long time. That there is the slightest possibility you could do so to almost every single one of their mental defences and attacks would terrify them. You would spend your whole existence running from attempts to blame you for crimes, or recruitment pitches that veiled their desires to enclose you within their organisation, so that they could find a way to assassinate you."

My whole body was tense with shock and fear, "oh my god. How do I- what do I do? I'm not interested in being a threat to them! I just want to get on with my life. I never asked for this. Can't I just tell them I have no issue with them? This is so messed up."

"I am sorry, Bella," Demetri grimaced, looking genuinely apologetic for the heap of trouble I was apparently in just for being me.

I covered my face with my hands for a moment, as though to block out all the information that had just been dumped on me. When I removed them after a few seconds, I saw Demetri approaching me slowly and carefully.

He placed a comforting hand on my upper arm, "I cannot take your problems away from you. There is nothing you can do about that. You could try to hide from the Volturi, I suppose. But I can promise you, the most that will last, whilst doing your utmost best not to be noticed, would be a few hundred years.

"However, there is no guarantee you will be able to hide for that long. It could be a year before they discover you, it could be a few months. All you can do is prepare."

"How do I do that?" I asked plaintively, begging Demetri silently, to give me the answers I sought.

"Remember," he soothed, "the Volturi are heavily reliant on their mental abilities when taking down vampires. I do not know if your gift allows you to block them all, but I know that for now it is your greatest asset, for all that its existence puts you in danger.

"The only things you can do at the moment, is to practice with it, until it is as strong as it can be."

I shook my head frantically, "I don't know how, Demetri, I can't even tell that I'm doing it right now."

"I know, and I will help you. I promise. It is why I placed aside so much time to help train you."

The fear and panic were almost overwhelming me, despite Demetri's promise, "what about that other vampire? The one that turned me. What if it's a big coven that's coming for me? Do you know who they might be?"

His lips twisted regretfully, "I am afraid not. I could take a guess, but it would really only be that; a guess. They call themselves vegetarian vampires, and because of the differences between them and us, they remain largely separate from the rest of vampire society.

"A lot of vampires do not even know they exist, as they do not usually travel as often or as far. They tend to congregate in large covens, compared to the small numbers that the rest of us outside the Volturi prefer.

But I know that although there are many of them, they remain largely unknown to even the Volturi. You will not find a lot of answers out there. Maybe one or two of the more well known vegetarian covens will be known amongst some of us... but I cannot tell you more than that."

Was this going to be my life then? Forever running, forever afraid of the vampires nipping at my heels. I didn't know if I could go on like that. I'd rather spend the rest of eternity in the deepest depths of the ocean, feeding from the underwater creatures and never coming up to experience air or unfiltered sunlight again.

Surely they'd never find me there. If Demetri- self proclaimed best tracker in the world- professed to not being able to use his ability on me, the rest would never find me either, right?

But I knew that that was unrealistic. I'd go mad eventually, from lack of conversation and companionship.

"You'll help me though right?" I pleaded, "you said you would. You'll help me learn what I need to survive. I don't want to be on the run for the rest of my life, Demetri. I couldn't take it."

Demetri placed his hands on either side of my face and tilted it up, that intense focus boring down into my eyes, and etching the words he spoke into my brain.

"I swear, Bella, by the time I am finished with you, you will be as close to untouchable as you are ever going to get. When we are through, I will have put you through hell, and you will come out the other side of it not knowing whether to curse my existence or thank me. But you will be so strong- strong in power, in mind and spirit."

And despite my fear, my doubts in myself, my desire to run and run and never stop from the dangers that had yet to identify themselves, I believed him.

"Why?" I whispered, "why are you doing this for me?"

He was putting his life on the line for me. If what he said was true, he wasn't going to get anything but trouble for helping me gain power.

"You should always keep in mind as a vampire, that few people are going to do anything for you without wanting something in return, Bella. You cannot afford to undervalue what you have to offer. Being humble, and having humility, will not gain you respect as one of us. You have to be assured in what you have and who you are, or you will be taken advantage of over and over again.

It is not an easy thing to learn. But with an ability like yours, you cannot afford not to. Everyone is going to want something from you. Some things will be harmless, and others will be to your complete detriment.

Many vampires have lived for thousands of years. They have had that long to learn how to get what they want. You are at a strong disadvantage right now. That gift of yours has the potential to gain you a lot of interest that you are not ready for, at all. However, it also has the potential to be your strongest asset. Do you understand me?"

I nodded silently, unable to speak. It felt as though a huge knot was lodged in my throat, and I knew if I could, I would be crying.

"Good." He stepped back, with his smile back on his face. "Now, I would suggest you take the time in the next couple of days to explore the city and nearby area. We will be assessing, during that time, where your control is up to. You are welcome to have a look through any room in the house. Just try not to get into too much trouble."

With that, Demetri spun on his heel fluidly and began to leave the garden at a speed I imagined would be ridiculously quick for a human, but seemed a fairly unhurried walk to me.

Before he entered the house, I managed to regain my wits just enough to speak, "wait. You didn't answer my question. What's so special about me to you, that you'd help me, just like that? You just said that every vampire will want something from me. So why don't you?"

I was taken aback by his response, which was to throw his head back and laugh. It was an unreserved gesture that seemed utterly unlike him. He didn't face me fully when he answered, but even with the half of his face I could see, he glowed with satisfaction and triumph.

"Now when did I say I was doing this for free? I stand by what I said; everyone is going to want something from you. Few people are going to do anything for you without wanting something in return. The way I see it, Bella, you are going to owe me something tremendous after this."

A cold sensation trickled down my spine, and although I aimed for confident in my rebuttal, it came out meek, "What if I don't want to do something for you? What if I don't want your offer after all?"

The single eye that I could see from my position glimmered knowingly. "Can you afford not to?"

There was nothing I could or wanted to say to that. Demetri was the only person I knew. The only person I could rely on. He was also the one with all the answers. I had to stay by him in order to gain what he had to give me, even if it was a double edged sword.

I was stuck here now, with him. He had information on me, which could result in what felt like the hounds of Hell after my life, if he shared it. I had fallen for his polite, smiling front, and although I was sure that side of him was genuine, I had failed to identify the shrewd calculating mind that lay behind those eyes.

He was right, and he had just proven it- I wasn't prepared, as I was, to face the rest of the world. I needed to learn, and he had the willingness to teach me.

I had an unknown number of vampires of unknown power as possible enemies, and a single ally.

It felt like death was coming for me and I had no where to hide.

* * *

 _Cheers! Hope you enjoyed reading. The super slow pace of this chapter almost killed me._

 _Do you trust Demetri? What do you think is his plan? Whose side is he on? Why did he lie/omit details about things? What do you think training is going to involve? What will Bella's relationship with the Volturi be like in the future? What about her relationship with Demetri? Will Jacob and Charlie find her?_

 _Also don't worry about romance between Demetri and Bella- it won't happen, she may trust him with her life, but not with her heart or her body intimately. And as for Alice seeing Bella, well, she's a bit preoccupied by other things. You'll find out what later on in the story._


	4. Dangerous secrets

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the general plot and OCs

Hiya! A huge thanks to everyone who's reviewed, favourited and liked!

So a couple comments were made about Alice's ability to See Bella, and initially I just planned to have her be avoiding looking for ages- I think she mentioned doing that in New Moon? I can't remember I haven't read the books since I was 11 -in order to keep Edward happy.

Her (and the Cullens') journey wasn't planned at all yet, and then imlovinfanfic mentioned that she's no longer around wolves in my story so wouldn't Alice See her?

And then it sorta clicked for me that of course Alice would have cheated and not stopped any naturally occurring Bella visions even if she told Edward she wouldn't look, except Jacob was around to stop them. But he's not here in mine.

Except I still don't want Alice noticing Bella yet. So I began to plan the Cullen plot, and then it ended up introduced way earlier than I initially intended to fit the time line.

So thanks imlovinfanfic for this chapter being now instead of later.

The Cullens will be following a slightly darker story than the others mostly, but nothing too bad actually happens to them, and I've done that to them because they all have each other to back each other up.

I wanted serious Edward character development, so I had to kick his mopy butt with a dose of harsh reality, and then keep kicking because he's annoyingly stubborn and thinks he's knows best and _words don't work._

Having said that, I'll never be too mean to him because I have a soft spot for him, since twilight was the second teen romance story I ever read - and yes I am calling Romeo and Juliet a teen romance, they're teens, it's a romantic tragedy, it was my first- and Edward was my first book character crush. Not fictional character crush, because that was Bugs Bunny. Five year old me wanted to be a cartoon rabbit when I was older and be Mrs Bugs Bunny, travelling the world and being a smart arse like my hubby.

As always, I got 99 problems and a Beta ain't one... so sorry for any mistakes- especially since I was super tired when editing this.

* * *

 **(Alice pov)**

The television was grainy, and the sound frequently cut out for minutes at a time, but I didn't remove my eyes from the screen. Not even when a scorched and smoking field was displayed, with soldiers methodically searching the entire area to ensure nothing was left unburnt.

The first time I had seen images like it, I had wept in tearless agony. When expert scientists began to release findings, I had cried at the implications of how the information had been sourced. But it had been some time since these things could touch me.

It was just a whitewash of horrors piled upon horrors and I was inured to the pain now. The images on the small screen were ugly and cruel to me, but it was nothing new. The world had become an ugly and cruel place.

a I didn't even know why we were still running. It was only ever a matter of time before one or both of us became just another handful of ashes blowing across a smoking field.

I was so tired of this. We rarely stopped for more than a few hours anymore. I hadn't bothered to remove the shemagh from my head- merely pulled it down to expose my face once we were inside. Only my boots had been removed; tattered and falling apart.

Edward sat just as frozen beside me, on the single bed we shared, staring at the screen dully. I think he too was waiting to die. He'd wanted it for long enough. Some part of me felt enough to be grateful that he had prolonged this poor excuse of an existence to be by my side until the end.

He silently slipped his hand in mine in response to my thoughts. The television crackled, and I lay my head on his shoulder.

A brief vision flashed through my mind. Edward squeezed my hand gently in response.

"He's decided to inform them," I whispered, unemotionally. It wasn't necessary- Edward had seen what I'd seen. But this was it for us and I felt the need to say something to mark the moment.

"He has two children and his wife is dead. He needs the money," Edward replied, his equally unemotional words belied by the feeling of his head gently resting over mine.

It had been the tiniest sliver of flesh exposed to the sunlight on my wrist, but it was enough and our guide had seen and known.

"Do you think Jasper's waiting for me?" I asked with a small broken smile, unable to hide my wistful tone.

There was a long pause, and I thought for a while that Edward wouldn't answer.

"Yes. I think he is," his voice was thick with regret, and I knew who he was thinking about, but I didn't say anything.

We heard them coming only when they had surrounded the tiny bunker-like room we were in. Their stealth technology was getting better, I mused absently. I wondered if we'd be one of the lucky ones who were dealt with at first contact, or the less fortunate ones who were 'detainees'.

Edward picked me up and pulled me into his lap, tucking my face into his neck as I wrapped my arms around him. There was nothing more to say, as we found comfort in each other during our last moments.

With a huge boom, the walls caved in around us and-

* * *

My back arched and my nails dug into the nearest solid thing they could find, out of the sheer terror I felt from my vision.

I blinked rapidly, as though that would help remove the images that had seared their way into my mind.

After too long, my thoughts cleared and I became present to Carlisle leaning over me worriedly, where I lay on the sofa.

"Alice? Are you with me?" He lay his palm against my cheek and looked into my eyes.

"I'm fine," I breathed, tremulously. He frowned, even more concerned, and sat beside me as I moved upright.

"You've been having quite a few of these ever since last Saturday. Would you like to talk about it?" Carlisle's question was soft, and lacking any expectation from me. Perhaps that was why I finally spoke about the visions that had been plaguing me.

"They're different each time. I don't know who's changing their mind to make the visions change. But I See me, sometimes you, sometimes other family members, and sometimes strangers. We're always so scared, or in shock, or grieving. We're always running. We're always going to die."

I bit my lip and looked up at Carlisle, "I don't know how we got there, or who's chasing us. I don't understand what I'm seeing! I don't know how to stop it. Every time I make a decision it does so little to change anything I See. Sometimes, my visions are unclear and it's like something's blocking them. I just- I don't know what to do Carlisle."

Carlisle appeared incredibly grave at the information I had given him, "can you tell me how far forward these visions are occurring?"

At seeing Carlisle's rational method at sorting through a problem, I allowed myself to calm down slightly.

"I can't say for sure. But it feels like a few years away at least."

He nodded, a troubled frown creasing his forehead.

"I suppose there isn't much we can do for now, then. You know how increasingly unlikely it is that a future you See comes to fruition, the further into the future you look."

"But-" I protested, however Carlisle held up a hand to stop me, with a reassuring smile.

"I'm not saying ignore them. Just don't let yourself obsess over what you See. Keep an eye on anything that allows you to identify a more specific pattern in them, and keep me updated."

I clasped my hands in my lap, and nodded my head in agreement. For all that Carlisle was usually someone who could allay most of my fears with a few sentences, I was still frightened.

I felt so helpless in the face of these terrible visions, that seemed to be looming over us all as a threat I could see but do nothing about.

Carlisle reached over and placed his hand over mine, "will it make you feel better if we call the family together and tell them all?"

I aimed a thankful smile in his direction and accepted his suggestion. I used my gift to briefly See our reunion and frowned regretfully for a moment.

"Edward won't come. Not for this," I sighed sadly. Carlisle echoed me.

Our family had been a shadow of itself since Edward had insisted we move and leave Bella behind. He had slunk off into whatever dark corner he was now brooding in, Rosalie and Emmet were usually off travelling together to get away from it all.

Jasper avoided most them when they did visit, disliking the emotions he could feel radiating from us all when we were together- and yet not because we were missing a member.

Esme and Carlisle were trying to let us sort this out amongst ourselves and not interfere, but I could tell they struggled to do nothing but provide a stable place and consistent support like always, when they could see us all suffering in some way.

I was spitting mad at Edward and could barely stand to be in the room with him before he left. There were conversations and feelings between us left unsaid and grown stagnant, and it had soured our relationship- What with him able to hear my thoughts but too mired in depression of his own creating to reach out and talk about things.

"I'll give Edward a call after work today, to at least update him. Could you call Emmett and Rosalie for me? They should arrive back tomorrow night at the same time as Esme and Jasper then, if they begin to make their way home today. Now I have to go to work, but I can stay if you need the company whilst Esme and Jasper are hunting."

I declined, "Thank you Carlisle, but I'll be fine. I think I'll just go and do some retail therapy while I make the call. There's a pair of gorgeous shoes I saw last week and I want to go back and buy them, and maybe a couple outfits to go with them."

He laughed, and stood, "okay good luck with that. Try not to go too crazy and buy a whole store."

"That was one time!"

He flashed a fond grin at me, "I count twice, actually. Now, don't worry over things too much just yet Alice. Have fun today."

He went to collect his bag by the front door, gave me one last paternal smile, and left.

I sat there for a few minutes, trying to do as he had told me and not worry too much, but before long the images that had been haunting me for almost a week began to intrude on my thoughts.

"Shoot," I muttered in aggravation, "retail therapy it is."

* * *

 **(Carlisle pov)**

As I finished making notes in one of my patient's file, I released a soft sigh, lost in thoughts. It had been a rough day, with a road collision resulting in one dead on scene, one who succumbed to wounds on their way to us in the ambulance, and one currently in a coma, after a severe blow to the head, as well as a broken spine- if they woke up, they would likely never walk again.

That had been in the first half an hour.

I had been on the go from the moment I walked in the doors, and had I not been a vampire I would have been run off my feet by this point.

Thank god it was going to be the end of my shift soon. I ruefully rubbed the back of my neck as I mentally acknowledged that it had been difficult to keep my mind on the job in the few snatched minutes I had had, that hadn't been completely hectic.

It had been that way for months now, and although I was still able to work with my usual professional efficiency so that nobody else had noticed, I was still mildly frustrated at my inability to fully concentrate.

I was just so concerned about my family all the time. It felt like we were silently falling apart and I was desperately trying to cling to them all with fingertips as they slipped out of my grasp regardless.

Edward, Alice and Esme worried me particularly. Edward especially had been silent and withdrawn since September and had only become worse over time.

I rarely saw or spoke to him now, and although I had faith that he would return to us once more, like he had last time he left, it pained me to see my child so unhappy.

I wanted to force him to make the choices that would make him- and Bella -smile once more, but he had to make his own decisions and grow from them.

I couldn't do that for him- all I could do was provide a stable presence to welcome him home if he wanted to come back, and listen with a steady ear if he chose to talk.

My beautiful Esme- of course I worried over her. It pained her even more than it did me to see our family fracture like it had. She was so full of love for each and every one of them that all she wanted, was to see them thrive. She lived for our family, and I had held her more than once as she cried at her inability to fix things for them.

Finally, Alice. The increasingly frequent visions that had seemed to plague her since the 7th, nearly a week ago, had had her quiet and pensive- two words I had never thought to apply to her before. Her perpetual cheer and bubbly attitude was stifled, and she walked around with a solemn, thoughtful look on her face more often than not.

Jasper alleviated this when he could, but I could see the silent uncertainly and anxiety he watched her with.

I didn't know what else to do but wait for this to blow over and our family to come back together once more.

I continued on this train of thought- as I seemed to spend too much time doing lately- and worked silently, until with a mixture of dread and relief, the time for me to return home came. Relief because I was only spending my time here allowing my fears and personal failures to distract me, but dread because I knew I was returning to a home that was far emptier than it should be.

As I made my way toward the exit of the hospital I heard the familiar stilted steps, shallow breaths and rapid heartbeat of Dr. Jones approaching. I paused as he came up behind me, pasted a genial smile on my face, and turned to greet him.

"Dr. Jones, how are you? I haven't seen you for a few days." I asked warmly.

From the first time I had met Dr. Jones, he had reacted strangely to me. Initially I had assumed it was the instinctive response many more perceptive humans had around vampires, before eventually they settled down once we made no threatening moves, and if not warmed up to us, at least accepted our presence.

But Dr. Jones' wariness had, over the last six months, gradually increased. It couldn't be called anything but fear now. I had my suspicions as to just why he was so afraid of me, but hadn't been able to confirm anything.

Dr. Jones swallowed, his pupils dilated, his breath stuttered in his throat, and sweat rapidly beaded on his dark forehead. He paused for far too long, even for a human, and shuffled nervously.

My eyebrows raised at the rapid deterioration of Dr. Jones' nerves over the last few weeks, culminating in this; him unable to make himself speak to me, and fighting the desire to run as soon as he faced me.

It made me sad, that just being who I was could inspire such terror in another, and I wished to alleviate the man of his troubles, by assuring him I would not hurt him.

However, to my chagrin, I couldn't do that. It would only confirm for him what I suspected he already knew. My first priority had to be my family, and thus upholding the laws.

If Dr. Terry Jones had somehow found out about the existence of vampires, I would need to either have him turned or have him killed, despite my strong reluctance to do so.

"Dr. Jones? Are you alright?"

He shifted his gaze rapidly between me and the door, as though hoping to make a run for it, before he wiped his palms on his trousers and swallowed again, his throat clicking from a lack of moisture.

"M-miss Drew would like to talk. To you. Before you go," He opened his mouth to say more in his warm African accent, but at that moment he briefly met my eyes and visibly quailed. His teeth clacked together firmly, his breathing and pulse picking up rapidly, and he scurried away, seeming to twitch a few times as he did so.

"Well okay then," I murmured to myself, watching him go.

I turned my thoughts toward Miss Drew, the daughter of the man in a coma, and made my way toward where I could hear her speaking on the phone, across the hospital.

When I found her, hiding my eagerness to get home, she tilted her lips wearily at me, in a parody of a smile, even as I heard her heart beat pick up slightly in attraction.

"I just wanted to thank you, Dr. Cullen. I've been informed by one of the nurses, that without you my dad would be dead."

Despite my desire to leave the hospital, it was always nice to receive recognition for my work. Saving lives like I could was, for me, the most important job in the world. It made me glad each time I could face a relative or loved one and give them good news because of my actions.

I spoke a bit longer about Mr. Drew, and what his recovery would look like if he awoke anytime soon. Just as the conversation began to come to an end, a familiar voice muttering caught my ears, from a supply cupboard down the hall.

"Can't let him- got to get rid of it. No. It's too- too late for that. Should have just left. Can't leave now- going to find me again. Always knew it would... no running from this. No running this time. He already knows. I see- those demon-yellow eyes. They know. Watching me. I can't... I'm sorry. I'm sorry... sorry."

Jagged, rasping sobs met my ears as I heard Dr. Jones descend into a litany of 'sorry's and quiet, desperate cries.

Something must have shown on my face, despite my ability to hold a conversation as I listened to Dr. Jones wipe his face with what sounded like his sleeve, take a few deep shaky breaths, and leave.

"Dr. Cullen, you seem distracted all of a sudden. I'm sorry, am I keeping you? I've just noticed you're not in the same clothes as before. Were you on your way home?"

I tilted my head away in embarrassment and winced slightly, "ah, you caught me. I apologise if it looked like I wasn't listening. It's just that I remembered I'm supposed to be picking my daughter up soon," I lied.

Miss Drew's eyes lit up, despite her tired demeanour, and I could see the reassessment she gave me, mentally placing a young child in the picture as most did when I told them I was a father.

Something about that image usually resulted in the same reaction I could see from Miss Drew, in many women. She softened visibly, and smiled with pinked cheeks.

"Oh, by all means then, go and pick her up. I'm sorry for delaying you Dr. Cullen," her voice had become a touch more breathy, her flush had deepened, and her pupils dilated.

I ignored it all with an ease from years of the same from most women, and some men too.

"There's no need to apologise Miss Drew. I wish you and your father all the best, and I assure you we'll do our utmost to help your father."

I politely made my goodbyes, and exited the hospital.

The moment I sat behind the wheel of my car, I strained my ears for the whereabouts of Dr. Jones. He was usually fairly easy to pick out, due to being the only person in the hospital with an African accent more often than not.

However, after a few minutes of listening carefully, and a quick scan of the parking lot, it became clear that he had left already.

His words had alarmed me. It had sounded like he was teetering on the edge of a breakdown. I couldn't afford the risk that he might snap and tell someone what I was. That would put my whole family at risk.

But could I make the choice to have him killed when I had no definitive proof that he knew what I was? If I condemned a man to die; whether that was through loss of his humanity or his life, I had to make sure it really was the only viable choice left to me, and not out of a paranoid suspicion.

I was reluctant to admit to even myself, that one of my main reasons for wanting to be certain, was that the three members of our family who had volunteered to deal with situations like this were Emmet, Rosalie and Jasper. Of those three, Jasper was the only one readily available at the moment.

I knew if I had read this situation wrong and forced Jasper to end yet another life unnecessarily, I would cause him needless difficulty- especially as the family member who most felt the fear and pain of the victim out of the three.

However, there was only one way that came to mind that would allow me to be certain, without giving myself away if Dr. Jones didn't truly know our secret.

Mustering myself, I reached into my pocket and dialled the required number.

* * *

 **(Edward pov)**

With pitch black eyes, I looked down at the bustling crowd below, barely noticing what I was seeing, and allowing my mind to loose itself in the stream of thoughts I could hear come and go beneath me.

My throat burned with an agony that matched what I felt in my chest. I hadn't fed in weeks. I hadn't moved in almost that same length of time.

There was no point. Nothing to do. Nowhere to be. So I stood, with no movement to differentiate me from a lifelike statue, losing myself in the mundane thoughts of people below and waking dreams of Bella's life without me.

Growing up, moving on, falling in love, having children. Dying.

The agony in my chest roared at that thought. But there was no indication of this from me- no sign of life.

It was better than what I could give her though. A life without me, with some heartbreak at the start, was better than a life filled with danger of any small accident spilling her blood and forcing me to watch one of my family members drain her dry.

Or worse, slipping up, and doing the deed myself. Killing the one I love.

Alice would have me do that anyway. By her reckoning, condemning Bella's soul would be better than allowing her to live a healthy human life, filled with all the fleeting and fragile beauty it should contain.

I couldn't bring myself to do that to her though. I was a enough of a monster already, without dragging someone else- someone so pure and fundamentally _human_ \- to these inhuman depths.

Every second was a nightmare filled fight with myself. I yearned with almost everything I had to return to her. It was torture, to the point that I felt physical pain.

I denied myself though. As I would keep denying myself, until I was no longer a threat to Bella's human life, and she was gone. Then I could follow her into death, and pray with everything I had that an exception could be made, just once, to allow something like me to join someone like her in the afterlife.

My phone rang across the room from me.

I waited until a second before it went silent to pick it up, checking the caller ID before I did.

"Carlisle." Even in that single word, I couldn't keep the raw pain from my voice.

"Edward," Carlisle hesitated, 'I need you to come home."

"I told you Carlisle-"

"I know. You know usually I would respect your wishes. But I need your mind reading ability."

I noticed then, the firm tone he was speaking in. This wasn't something he was requesting of me on a whim. He wasn't like that anyway. I knew Carlisle would only ask this if it was fairly serious.

"How soon do you need me?" I inquired, resigned.

"As soon as you can get here. I think our secret may be compromised, but I'm not sure."

"Why don't you leave then?"

If someone became suspicious in the past, we always tried to leave before they could confirm anything.

"Well, either he already knows, in which case we'd have a decision on our hands that the whole family would need to agree to, or he doesn't and he's going through a mental breakdown. They'll be back tomorrow regardless." Carlisle replied, somewhat drily.

"I don't want to see them." I blurted, almost before I could think. Despite the heavy pause from Carlisle afterward, I couldn't make myself take the words back.

I didn't want to see them all, happy and together with their mates, with an eternity in love ahead of them. Not when my body was under constant punishment out of the sheer emotional suffering I was experiencing.

Not when it would mean that I would be there, resenting my family for their love for each other and their pity for my loss. I didn't want to do that to myself. I didn't want to do that to them either. They didn't deserve the backlash from how much I hurt.

"Okay. I won't make you, if you don't want to. Call me when you're close, and I'll meet you at the hospital."

"I'll be there tomorrow evening."

I put the phone down before he could reply, and pinched the bridge of my nose. I didn't want to go, but when Carlisle asked something like from me, I felt obliged to agree, after the decades of doing so much for me.

A small breeze blew through the tiny crack I'd had the window open, bringing with it all the scents on the wind outside.

My throat burned fiercely at the scent of the crowd below. I needed to leave immediately in order to hunt, and still get to Carlisle on time.

I walked swiftly to the bedroom and picked up the bag I hadn't bothered unpacking since I got here. Looking around briefly, the flat didn't look like I had ever been there. I hadn't even bothered turning any lights on, or removing the dust from the surfaces that had accumulated since it was bought.

Locking up the flat behind me, and placing my bag in the boot of my car, I was ready to leave as soon as I got back from my hunt. It would have to be a quick one, despite my severe thirst.

I didn't have time to indulge in a proper hunt, but I wasn't worried about my control- it had come in leaps and bounds since I met Bella.

I drove for twenty minutes to a convenient spot where I knew it was unlikely to be found, locked the car, and ran at full speed into the trees.

* * *

I spotted Carlisle waiting for me as I pulled into the parking lot of the hospital he worked at. His face lit up at the sight of me, despite the situation, and I briefly felt guilty at the extended absence I had taken from the family.

But I still couldn't make myself reflect the pleased emotion he felt, and my lips were turned down at the corners automatically, from my dark mood.

It was better that I didn't subject the others to my presence. I would inevitably say things I didn't really mean in response to their thoughts about me and Bella.

"Edward, it's good to see you." Carlisle pulled me into a quick hug- I knew from that action that he had been worried about me.

He wasn't stingy in his affection, but he was from a time and family in which overt gestures of love between anyone but husband and wife was not encouraged. It had left its mark.

Carlisle pulled back, hands still grasping my arms, and looked over me with a furrowed brow, noting the dark smudges still under my eyes, the dull mustard color of my eyes, and the blank expression I wore.

I could see the corners of his eyes tighten in displeasure, but I didn't have it within me to put on an act of being any semblance of okay.

"Tell me what I need to know, Carlisle." I quietly stated.

He stepped back, releasing my upper arms, and succinctly summarised in response to my intolerant mood.

"Dr. Terry Jones has worked here for about five years. According to the rest of our colleagues, he was usually a very vibrant, open and cheerful person. I've never witnessed him like that. From day one of working with him, he's been consistently wary of me. Over the past six months that wariness has gradually turned to fear.

"In the past few weeks the fear has become terror. He's acting like he's on the verge of a breakdown- the others have noticed him acting slightly erratically too. I've been admittedly reluctant to look too deep into his reactions in case I discovered what I fear we're about to, and was forced to act on the knowledge.

"Shortly before I left the hospital yesterday, I heard him muttering to himself. He sounded paranoid, stressed, overwrought. He mentioned demon-yellow eyes within that. It has me concerned. I'm not confident that if he knows about me, and does have a mental breakdown, he wouldn't do something drastic to reveal me... us, to others."

I showed no reaction to his words beyond a slight tightening of my lips, as I stared into space, mulling the information over in my head.

"What do you know about his past? It sounds like he already knew about vampires before he met you." My voice was listless, but it was the best I summon for Carlisle. He made no comment either way to my mood.

"Not much to be honest. I know he's from Africa. I don't even know where in Africa- he's never mentioned it to anyone and I'm not very good at identifying country of origin, outside of Europe, based upon accent.

"I know that he became a doctor while he was in Africa and remained there until he was twenty seven- about twenty seven years ago. That's all he's spoken about himself. For all that he was apparently very open before I arrived, he never divulged much personal information about himself."

I hummed thoughtfully, and pondered over what I knew about vampires in Africa. After a second I realised that it was very little. I had never actually met a vampire from that continent, besides the Egyptian coven.

I knew the Egyptian coven had once been incredibly powerful, until the Volturi had decimated them. Now there were few left, and even then, when Amun had tried to rebuild, the Volturi had stolen their members due to their gifts.

The Egyptian coven was an ancient coven though, and I knew more vampires must have been made on the continent since then. I'd never heard of any, however.

I had no idea under what situation Dr. Jones may have met a vampire in his past. Or if it was even in Africa for that matter.

It wasn't particularly important, though. All that mattered was putting an end to the threat he unwittingly brought to the family.

"Is he inside?" I asked Carlisle.

"Yes. It's my day off today, and I'm hoping that the sight of me there will catch him off guard enough for you to get a clear read on him. I can go in with you on the pretence of picking up my cellphone, if anyone asks."

I nodded shortly, and without any further discussion, we entered the hospital. Carlisle tilted his head to the side as he sifted through all the voices of people talking in the hospital, for the one he was looking for.

It took a few minutes before Dr. Jones spoke, but when he did it was thankfully quite close, and he was by himself.

I could easily pinpoint him from the rest of the people in the hospital. Not only due to his accent and proximity, but also by the frantic, incomprehensible muttering under his breath that held a clear hysterical edge to it.

We followed the voice to the man's location. He was pacing up and down an empty room as he murmured, and immediately I could hear his thoughts were as jumpy, frantic and incomprehensible as his words- half sentences and ideas snatching themselves away as soon as they formed, all tinged with fear, paranoia and guilt.

Hopefully Carlisle's appearance would lend them a bit of clarity, out of shock if nothing else.

I gave Carlisle a brief nod, to show I was ready, and he entered the room, closing the door behind him. Dr. Jones didn't notice, too caught up in his pacing and muttering, until Carlisle cleared his throat politely.

Dr. Jones startled, and the moment he saw Carlisle, I could hear the near wild beating of his heart, his breath sped up to become an uneven pant, and he began to back away.

I focused on his thoughts, but they sped almost too fast for me to catch anything.

I was only half aware of Carlisle explaining to Dr. Jones that he had heard someone pacing inside, and asking if he was feeling alright.

I caught flashes of information and images, blurred and blended together in ways that didn't make any sense, as his mind jumped rapidly toward a near blinding terror.

Carlisle approached Dr Jones cautiously, repeating his question, as Dr Jones continued to back away until he bumped into the worktop behind him.

I frowned and pushed harder to listen, trying to find something that I could understand.

A dark, fairly clean looking room with medical equipment and a computer, that were more common almost twenty years ago. I concentrated, and then-

"Dr. Jones, did you hear me? I asked if you're feeling alright."

 **A substance that excites but terrifies me in its potential.**

 **Keep my head down. Just do as I'm told.**

* * *

"Please give me a sign you can hear me, Terry."

 **People going missing all around me. They have been transferred according my superiors.**

 **Covering my ears and silently crying as the newest recruit is shot in the head around the corner. He couldn't take what was in The Room anymore.**

 **Keep my head down. Suspicion and fear on all sides.**

* * *

"Calm down Dr. Jones, there's no need to be so frightened."

 **We have to work faster. Breakthroughs are too slow.**

 **The thick metal door to The Room haunts me. I dread entering it.**

* * *

"Dr. Jones? Please, put down the scalpel. You might hurt yourself."

 **That thing is visiting to check progress. The thing that was once human but isn't anymore.**

 **It enjoys seeing what goes on behind that thick metal door.**

 **It scares me more than anything else.**

 **It will kill me one day, I am sure. Or I will be gunned down.**

 **Just keep my head down and say nothing.**

* * *

"Terry? You're safe here, I promise. Can I approach?"

 **I have to get away. Red eyed, pale demons.**

* * *

Dr. Jones let out a strangled yell the moment Carlisle touched him, pushing past him in panic and rushing out the room.

I jerked my mind away from Dr. Jones' abruptly, overwhelmed by the intensity of his flashbacks.

The moment he saw me by the door, the blood drained from his face and a despairing wail left his mouth.

 **They've found me. They know.**

His eyes darted to and fro briefly. Then he turned and sprinted away.

I stared at his retreating back with wide eyes, as Carlisle approached me, perturbed.

I took a few seconds to gather my thoughts before I spoke.

"He's definitely met a vampire before. He's haunted by a red eyed pale figure. He barely even sees you when he looks at you. He sees this other person.

"He's so scared of whoever they are, it's practically driving him mad. I get the sense he escaped from them and lives in fear they'll find him."

I watched Carlisle carefully with my next words, "He'd never accept being bitten even if we were going to offer it. I have no idea what he'll do with the information he has on us. It could be anything. He could choose to run, try to kill us, tell others. I honestly don't know. He's too frightened to be thinking clearly."

I could hear that Carlisle was disappointed Dr. Jones knew about vampires, and wasn't amenable to a more peaceful solution. If he had been up for being bitten, we could have found someone who was willing to transform and take responsibility for him.

"Carlisle, I wouldn't suggest allowing Dr. Jones to be alone to do anything with the knowledge he has." I warned, "it sounded like he was at breaking point and just tumbled over it. I know we need the others' inputs, but we need to at least detain him in the mean time."

Carlisle was saddened by the actions he was required to take, but as always, the family came first.

It was an unfortunate necessity Carlisle disliked about being a vampire- that sometimes had to break his Hippocratic oath in order to keep us safe.

"Very well," he sighed, "I can no longer hear him. Can you?"

I scanned the thoughts of the hospital, but couldn't identify Dr. Jones' distinctive thoughts.

"No. I don't think he's here anymore. I'll check the parking lot for his car," I offered, having caught what it looked like from Carlisle's mind.

"I'm going to check the hospital records on the employees, to find his home address. If he's going to try to run, he may stop off at home first."

It didn't take either of us long to discover the man's address, and that his car was gone- thick tire marks on the ground that still smelled, where he had pulled out and driven away in a desperate hurry.

Carlisle caught up to me whilst speaking in low hurried tones into his cellphone, where I was waiting by my car- it was built for speed, whereas Carlisle's was chosen to help him keep up his respectable appearance.

He hung up and we both got into the car, Carlisle behind the wheel since he knew the area better, as well as the address.

"That was Alice," he informed me, putting the car into gear, and pulling out with a speed and recklessness that would have probably shocked anyone who knew 'nice, polite Dr. Cullen', and not vampire coven leader Carlisle.

"She didn't See much when she checked, so he probably hasn't made his mind up about what he's going to do yet. But she did say she could See him driving on a street close to where he lives. She told me she'll be keeping an eye on the family's future, just in case."

He drove with a speed that I might have been hard pressed to match in a car that wasn't my own, and thus intimately familiar.

I didn't speak, as we raced toward Dr. Jones' home. But I prepared for multiple possibilities for when we arrived.

It took us just over ten minutes to get there, spotting his car haphazardly spilling onto his driveway as we arrived.

We noticed immediately, once we were out of the car, that the front door wasn't quite closed properly. We also smelt the blood.

Carlisle raced forward at speed inside, while I hung back for a moment in uncertainty. Was my control good enough to face the amount of blood I could smell on the air?

My throat burned like usual, but I could suppress it fairly easily. After checking the area, I was assured no one had seen us, thankful for the lack of light and people around.

Following Carlisle inside, I froze once I saw Dr. Jones. He lay sprawled on the floor in a pool of his own blood, a gun discarded on the floor beside him.

"How's your thirst?" Carlisle asked me.

"It's fine. What do we do?"

He eyed the body wearily, sadness lining his features.

"There's not much we can do. Did you hear if anyone heard the gunshot?"

I shook my head, "I don't think they did. There are a few people up, but from what I can tell, they're watching TV."

I paused for a moment, not sure if I should verbalise the thought running through my mind. Did I care enough to do so? I honestly just wanted to go back to the flat I had been staying at.

This felt like a kick in the gut, like no matter what we did, just by existing, blood was spilt and people died.

I internally groaned at the insistent voice in my head, telling me this was important, "Carlisle, I think we should search the house."

He looked at me in surprise, and I appreciated the fact that he didn't verbalise the ideas of disrespect to the dead, and being too zealous in my caution, floating through his mind.

"Why?" He asked curiously, "did you find an indication in his mind that there was something here we needed to find?"

"I'm not sure," I admitted, "there was something. Just before he ran away from me. It was only a split second. A piece of paper, or a sheaf of notes- something along those lines. But there was something he was scared of us finding. I can't imagine where it would be, apart from here. And even if it's not, there could be a clue to point to where he'd keep them-like a safety deposit box."

"You really think this is important to us?" Carlisle checked.

"I don't know. But I think if it is, we should probably have our hands on it. And if it's not, no harm done- more than has already occurred anyway."

Carlisle grimaced in distaste at the thought of rummaging through and stealing from a dead man's belongings, but acquiesced.

"Okay, but let's make this as quick as possible. I don't want someone to see an unfamiliar car outside of a recently dead man's house. When his body is found, someone might mention it, and give the authorities the idea of suspicious circumstances."

We systematically made our way through his house, from bottom up. There was something unsettling about rummaging through his possessions, through the home of a man who was obviously in the middle of living his life from the way everything was placed, yet knowing his dead body was still cooling downstairs.

It was like two things that didn't fit together, in the same reality, but evidently did nonetheless.

We hadn't found anything, and I was beginning to doubt what I had seen- it had been for such a short moment, and coming from the mind of someone almost insane with fear- I searched the bathroom off from Dr. Jones' bedroom, as Carlisle checked through the Doctor's computer, just in case.

It was as I closed the mirrored cabinet above the bathroom sink, that my movements tilted the entire cabinet to the side slightly, like a picture frame hung on a wall.

Just to be thorough, I emptied it out, and fully tilted it to the side. I knew it. Behind the bathroom cabinet, was a small, carefully chipped away hole in the wall. And inside that hole, was a rolled up folder.

As soon as I saw it, I was certain it was exactly what we were looking for. I opened the old, battered looking folder curiously.

Despite my previous medical degrees, I was frustrated by the difficulty I had deciphering what I was reading. The pages were a mishmash of English and a language I didn't speak let alone read.

Probably native to whichever country Dr. Jones came from- or whatever his real name was, because he had almost certainly changed it when he left.

Even the notes I could read, were often tangents that seemed to switch before the line of thought could be finished. It wasn't until I flipped through the folder three times- once at my usual speed, the second time much slower, and the third time just in case- that I spotted an alarming pattern.

"Carlisle. You need to look at this," the urgency I spoke with had Carlisle's attention immediately, and I moved to his side with speed.

I lay the folder down in front of him, and waited impatiently as he flicked through it. I knew he would pick up on what I had seen quicker than I did.

For all that I been to university and gotten medical degree multiple times, we had never been able to stay in an area for long enough for me to put it into practice.

I had a good theoretical understanding, but Carlisle had a lifetime of experience on top of that.

I could tell when he found what had had me calling out to him.

"Is this- this is referring to a chemical breakdown of vampire venom...oh dear. That isn't good."

I laughed harshly at the understatement. Not good? It was a disaster. We need to find out who else had the information and what they had done with it.

"That folder is decades old. That research is decades old. We have no idea how far they've gotten with it since then. The kind of technological and medical advancements that have been seen in the last twenty years would have given whoever the hell is doing that research what they need to complete it." I growled.

I brushed a hand through my hair and bowed my head, barely able to comprehend how bad this was, and how much damage had been done to our secret.

"Carlisle we have to find out where this came from. We need to trace this to its source and get rid of it. Everything."

Carlisle was silent, as I vented, not removing his eyes from the incriminating evidence in front of him.

"And what about the people involved?" He asked of me quietly, "what would you have us do to all the people who know about this, who funded it, organised it, carried out the research? Would you have us slaughter them all?"

That gave me pause. Of course there would be at least a decent sized team of humans behind this. There would have to be to get this far with the research- it was certainly expensive. Would I condemn them to death?

Many, if not most, of them would likely have had little choice in what they researching. Would I kill them for that?

But then I imagined what could happen- what would be done if this wasn't nipped in the bud. It would be a nightmare.

The people I loved, my family, our friends, my world. It was all at stake. I wasn't just deciding for me, and for our coven. This was for every vampire that was alive. Every vampire that would be alive.

We were not a very social and connected species, but I was one of them, and they were... _my_ people, as odd as that sounded in my mind.

Sure, I could hand the decision off to the Volturi. But I knew, and Carlisle knew, that not only would they be hindered by politics, their image, maintaining their power base, but there was no one better suited than a vegetarian coven, at understanding, routing out and destroying the spread of information by humans, in this modern age of technology.

The Volturi, for all that they understood enough to get by, were woefully undereducated about the details and intricacies of this new age of information, in the interconnected human world.

There would be no better suited coven than the Cullens at this. Especially with something based in medical science like it was. What with Alice's foresight, my ability to read minds, mine and Carlisle's understanding of modern science, and Jasper's empathy and ability to detach himself from his emotion to reach a state of cold rationality.

 _All_ of us were better and more practiced at manoeuvring in the human world than any other coven.

I swallowed thickly, and met Carlisle's gaze levelly, "I would have us kill them all, yes. We aren't making this choice just for us. Every other vampire bears the consequences of our choice here. We risk too much to be merciful. Not for this."

He stared at me with a blank face, but I could hear the riot of thoughts that tormented him. He hated this situation. Loathed the choices he faced, with everything he had. There was no option here that didn't, in some way, end up with too many lives in his hands.

This went against everything he was, everything he believed himself to be.

Carlisle smiled a bleak, joyless smile at me, "Very well."

His phone rang, a discordant sound in the otherwise silent room. We both saw Alice's name on the screen, and glanced at each other as he answered on loud speaker.

"What did you _do_!?" Her voice shrieked into the air between us, "what _did-you-do_!? Everything has changed for us! _Everything_! I _can't See_. Everything after a certain point is _gone_. What-have-you- _done_!"

Her words became a furious snarl as they became louder.

"Alice," Carlisle replied steadily, "get everyone to pack their bags and be ready to leave by the time we're home. We'll explain once we arrive." And then he hung up.

We stared at each other with mirrored emotions in our eyes; fear, dread, determination, regret, guilt, and a fierce, united resolve.

* * *

 _It's all ogre now! How do you think they got their hands on vampire venom? How many people know about this? What will the Cullens have to do to keep things a secret? Will they even succeed? Are they making the right choice?_

 _will Carlisle have what it takes to stop the research from spreading further? What do you think humans have done with it? What does that unknown vamp Dr. Jones was scared of have to do with it?_

 _I felt like the hole in the wall was totally cliched, but I was too tired to write anything more intelligent. It was super difficult to find a balance between Carlisle vamp father/leader doing what needs to be done, and pacifist Carlisle who just wants to save and help people, and do them both credit. Also, all but one of my main characters has now had a pov introduction to the story! Yay!_

 _I'm going to try to keep it to Bella, Jacob, Edward/rest of the Cullens, Charlie and my last character to be written about. Others might get an occasional look in but not too often. As for Demetri, I quite like the ambiguity surrounding him, so even though he's a central character he'll be written about from the view of other people._

 _Hope you weren't all too put off by the dark themes in this chapter x_


	5. A father's heart

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the general plot and OCs

Whats up peeps! Back again for a short chapter. This one's about half the length, but I've split it into two, rather than keep going like I had originally planned.

This is because this chapter was a bit like pulling teeth for me. I just couldn't concentrate at all- although that might have been because all I've had to eat has been some leftovers and four hot chocolates.

So like I said before, the updates will be further apart from now on most of the time, because I have so much work to do for summer exams. There were a few things I wanted to say but I've forgotten most of them.

Oh! I remember; I said previously that I haven't read any twilight books in years, so I've forgotten a lot of small details. If there are fairly little things that are different in mine, and don't have a some sort of explanation either in the story or in my notes, it means that I made a mistake, and either suspend your belief, or inform me.

Another is that I'll keep an eye on it, but I may misspell Jasper throughout this story. It's autocorrect! I have a family member with that name, spelt differently. My iPad keeps assuming that's what I mean.

Between Charlie and Jake, I'm trying to create a realistic relationship that acknowledges his youth and is sort of friendship/paternal. As such, I'm basing some of it off the brother I have who most resembles Jacob Black, and my dad. This may result in me projecting my brother onto Jacob now and then. I don't think I've done that much this time thankfully.

Seriously, my mum read the second half of the second chapter and was like 'that's just like you're brother'.

Also there's a character who sort of just demanded to be inserted around this point, who I had no intention of introducing just yet. I blame imlovinfanfic for subconsciously making me do this with their review. Thank you!

Finally, I know basically nothing about how the police work for missing persons cases, or how hospitals work. Especially in America. I did a bit of research for the missing person thing. But I'm fairly guaranteed to get it wrong.

Once more- betas betas everywhere, not a single one to check my story. So, sorry for mistakes. Also sorry for such long notes at the start each time. I just can't help myself.

* * *

 **(Charlie pov)**

Putting the phone down, I groaned wearily, having updated Renée on the search for Bella. It was difficult being in such regular contact with her, when every time I spoke to her I was hit with a strong nostalgia and wistfulness for what we had once had, but speaking to her was the least of my worries whilst Bella was still missing.

A small guilty part of me was glad that, as long as I kept her up to date, at least she wasn't coming to Forks herself. Her husband was still needed for work, and I had assured Renée that she would do no good here. It was better to be where she was in case Bella made her way to them.

Stumbling my way downstairs, with a jaw cracking yawn, I blearily shuffled to the kitchen for coffee.

It's wasn't until I had a steaming cup in my hand, and reentered the living room, that I spotted the brown legs draping over the arm of the sofa belonging to the snoring boy, half naked, having kicked the blanket he was using onto the floor during the night.

That's right, Jacob stayed over again last night.

We had spent most of the previous day with the search party scouring the area, to no luck. Jake had been a surprisingly useful contribution. After days in which the only thing I had managed to confirm about Bella, was that she wasn't with any of her Forks friends or with Renée, it had felt like a massive breakthrough when he had taken us straight to where Bella's truck was parked- close to where we had started the search on the first day, but surprisingly well hidden, where it was tucked away.

He had told us that he and Bella had been spending time in the area searching for a clearing- somewhere Bella had been before and was trying to find again- and pointed out on a map how he and Bella had initiated their search, as well as the area they had planned to check next before he stopped talking to her.

I had been briefly resentful at the idea that she wouldn't have gone missing if he had been with her, but squashed that feeling the moment Jake saw the expression on my face and guessed my thoughts.

The amount of guilt I could see from him had had me apologising for blaming him and once again reassuring him that it wasn't his fault.

After a couple of hours, in which Jake traversed the forest with the ease that most couldn't summon on a paved street- I was _not_ jealous- we had stumbled across the clearing that Jacob had been referring to.

I didn't know what I'd been expecting to find there, but I think some part of me had begun to cling to the unrealistic idea that she'd be waiting for us to find her. To get to it and see no sign that she'd been there, had been a disappointment that I had had to swallow bitterly in order to figure out what to do next.

Jake had pointed out that the sole reason she was out in the forest in the first place was to find the clearing, and having combed through the paths she may have taken to get there, we could at least confirm that she wasn't likely to simply have injured herself on the trek and be stuck- _something_ had happened.

From there we had fanned out from the clearing in the hope of finding where she may have gone. But we had found nothing.

Having finished by late afternoon, Jake had left to go home, and I had settled on looking through the case file to see what other information I could provide about Bella, with a whiskey at hand.

It had been just past 2am when a knock on the door had interrupted me. Once again, standing outside my house was Jacob Black- thankfully not covered in vomit and naked this time.

Although, where his shirt and shoes had gone in the hours between when I had last seen him and when he showed up on my doorstep, I pointedly didn't ask.

He hadn't given me an explanation for turning up, and I hadn't required one from him. I had just given him a spare pillow and blanket and said goodnight.

Looking down at him fast asleep still, I decided not to wake him just yet, and settled into the armchair to slowly sip my coffee.

I allowed myself half an hour of relaxation, as I mentally went through my itinerary for the day, before a garbled snuffling sound interrupted what had previously been a consistent light snore.

I watched with some amusement, as Jake shuffled onto his left side, and then shortly afterward shuffled onto his right side with an annoyed frown on his unconscious face, before with a huff, he settled onto his back, which caused his mouth to fall open and finally had him opening his eyes.

He smacked his lips together a few times, rubbing his eyes wearily, and eyeing his surroundings with a dazed and confused look.

"Whazzumisst," he slurred, his voice gravelly from sleep and then licked his lips, cleared his throat and tried again, "what time is it?"

"It's just past 6am." I held the mug in front of my mouth as I spoke in order to disguise my smirk.

He blinked a few times, before he seemed to comprehend my words and gave a distressed moan, trying to hide his face in his pillow.

"S'too early."

"You've got school and I have to put Bella on the NAMus missing persons database. I can print off posters then, and start placing them in the nearby areas."

That seemed to wake Jake up properly and he squinted at me, "I don't have school for a while."

I raised my eyebrow sceptically, "why not?"

There was a pause and I could practically see the story being invented behind his eyes, "There's a burst pipe and some of the classrooms are wrecked. School's out until they can fix the damage."

"Uh huh," the disbelief thick in my voice, "and if I called them, they'd back up this story?"

Jacob's face went blank, but the slight widening of his eyes easily gave him away, "uhhh... yes?"

I arched a brow at the terrible lie, but didn't push it further. In any other situation I'd have adamantly sent Jake off to school, regardless, but I was honestly too mentally tired to care all that much about school when there were things he could help me with.

"You got anywhere you need to be?" I asked.

Jacob grinned widely at my words, and shook his head, "not till this evening."

Slurping down the last of my coffee, I stood and stretched, "get yourself something to eat- I think we've got some cereal still hanging around the back of one of these cupboards."

After we had both finished eating- Jake had polished the lot, with four bowls- he listened carefully as I told him what I had already done during the search for Bella.

"Now, you said you and Bella went hiking a fair bit together. You got any idea what she might have been wearing? I didn't pay any attention to her clothes that day, and it'd be helpful to include that in the missing persons report."

He tapped his fingers on the table and frowned thoughtfully, "maybe. I don't know. I can take a guess, but she had a couple outfits she swapped between for it, and I can't really remember exactly what they looked like. I think I could tell you what boots she'd have been wearing though."

I nodded in reply, and then after a moment a thought occurred to me, "Well I guess we could find out which clothes are missing from her wardrobe and you could try telling me what they look like after that. We should find the things she usually wore, and hope that'll jog your memory."

Jake nodded absently, "that will prove she didn't pack her clothes before she went missing, and help to convince others she didn't run away as well."

There was a pause, as something occurred to Jake and his head jerked around to stare at me with wide eyed distress.

"Wait, did you say _we_ could find out as in... going through her clothes?" He sounded scandalised at the idea.

"Yes Jacob, how else are we going to find out what is and isn't there?" I retorted with a snort.

"But, you didn't mean me, right?" He practically squeaked.

"Well, two people are going to be quicker than one," I pointed out, being purposefully obtuse, "in fact we might as well get started now. I don't have to leave for a while and we have nothing better to do."

I got up and headed toward Bella's room, with a spluttering Jacob trailing behind me.

Ignoring him as I determinedly pulled open her wardrobe, I pulled out the tiny section of dresses and skirts that belonged to Bella, and placed them aside to look at the rest.

Jake hunched in on himself, out the corner of my eye, in a ridiculous attempt to decrease his size as he tentatively shuffled into Bella's room.

I felt my cheek twitch in an aborted grin, and watched him scan the room warily, as though some sort of girlish item of Bella's was going to leap and attack him.

"I think a couple drawers have her clothes in them too. You can pull those out and place them on the bed." I waved my arm in the general direction of her drawers.

Summoning his strength, Jake took a deep breath and eyed up the drawers like they were some sort of opponent. A second before he could touch the handle of the first drawer I opened my mouth.

"Of course it goes without saying, if you so much as take a peep at her underwear I'll shoot you." I stated blithely. He yelped and pulled his hand back like it was burnt.

He glanced at me nervously, wetting his lips, "w-which drawer has...that?"

I shrugged nonchalantly, "Well, I don't know. Bella does her own laundry, and puts her own clothes away."

"Right... I think I'll just give you a hand over there first."

I scoffed at him, "get over and help me kid. And stop acting like if I wasn't here and Bella was, you wouldn't be more than happy to sneak into this room."

Jake choked, and nearly tripped with a horrified expression, "Charlie! I- I would _never-_ "

"Yeah, yeah. Save it kid, I know what boys are like at your age; perverts the lot of them."

His cheeks flushed a mortified red and he shrieked, "Charlie! No!"

* * *

Over the next hour and a half, Jake and I sorted efficiently through her wardrobe. We gained a good idea of what she had been wearing the day she went missing, proved that she hadn't packed any clothes beforehand, and distracted each other from the lumps in our throats when we remembered the last time we had seen her wear something.

It was during this time that the last kernels of anger and resentment I had carried toward Jacob petered out. It occurred to me, while he was making me laugh with some stupid remark, that for all I had known Jake since he was a child, he had always been Billy's boy to me more than anything else.

Spending such a prolonged amount of time with him like I was, regardless of the circumstances, was making me fond of Jake as his own person. He'd always been happy go lucky, quick to laugh and even quicker to smile that beaming grin of his. I noticed though, that he carried a troubled and often angry weight to him occasionally, which had never been there before, and guessed that it was the effect of Bella going missing.

Either way, I was glad the kid was with me. He stopped my thoughts from spiralling down with what ifs, and helped to distract me from the glaring absence that was my daughter.

This only increased over the weeks that followed, as he became a near constant presence in my house and my life. The longer we stayed in each other's company, the easier laughter and banter became, and the lighter the atmosphere.

He was there with me when we visited all of the hospitals and police stations in any of the nearby areas, in case she had been there. He was by my side when we placed missing posters in as many places in Seattle and Port Angeles as we could.

In turn, I provided a safe space, each time he returned from the Rez, vibrating with pent up frustration and dissatisfaction. He began to come to me for advice in dealing with the strained relationship that was now between him and Billy. When he looked on the verge of collapsing under the weight of whatever he was carrying with him, he came to me for direction and something to do.

Every time either of us flagged, in the face of the lack of results in our search for Bella, the other was there to shoulder the stubborn resolve we wore like armour in order to continue.

It was just under three weeks after Jake first turned up on my doorstep, that I finally put my foot down and made him go back to school. He couldn't keep putting it off to look for Bella, and for all that I appreciated his company, I had a job to do as well.

I had been given some time off, and after that the guys had been understanding if I gave them some of my responsibilities so I could keep the search alive, but it was time I picked up the slack and got my head on straight.

* * *

It was only a few days after returning to school, I watched Jake walk in the door with a world weary curve to his shoulders that was far too evident for a kid his age, and I realised I couldn't remember the last time he had slept in his own place.

That wasn't saying too much, since the last weeks had been something of a blur to both of us, but I was fairly sure he had spent almost every night since the first on my sofa.

"Hey kid, you can sleep in Bella's room tonight."

Jacob's head shot up in surprise, "huh? Oh, uh that's okay Charlie. The sofa's fine."

I huffed, "don't be dumb, you barely fit on that thing. It's making feel cruel to come down in the morning and see your legs sticking all over the place off the end of it."

He hesitated, looking slightly uncomfortable, before insisting, "really, I'm okay with the sofa. It's Bella's room, not mine."

Squinting at him suspiciously, it didn't take me long to figure out what he was making him look so shifty.

"She's not here Jake. You are. In the mean time, you can have her bed. Besides, you've already gone through her clothes-"

"Don't make it sound like that!"

"-So I don't get what's so strange about you going into her room."

Jake nervously darted his eyes around as he tried to think of a decent excuse before he groaned in defeat, with a childish pout.

"Fine. I'll sleep in her room from now on."

"Good. Just don't make a mess of it, and wash the sheets at least once a week."

He reluctantly agreed, and went to place his spare pair of clothes in Bella's room. He already had a spare toothbrush and a couple extra things lying around the house, so it wasn't exactly a huge leap for him to borrow the one room not in use.

He awkwardly sidled up to her door and peeked inside. Rolling my eyes, I reached out and gave him a shove inside.

"Honestly, you've been in there before. What do you think you'll find there? Some super secret belonging that will traumatise you and change the way you think about girls forever? Don't be an idiot."

Jake glared impotently over his shoulder at me, and then tentatively sat on the bed like it might swallow him if he moved too fast.

I shook my head, reaching for the door handle, "I'm sure you can handle a bit of purple bedding. Good night Jacob." Before I closed the door I gave him a steely look.

"It shouldn't need to be said, but I know what boys your age are like, so I'm going to say it anyway; you sully this room and my daughter's bed by messing around with yourself and I'll shoot you."

The door shut firmly, as Jake's face contorted with horror.

"Charlie!" The muffled indignant shriek reached my ears as I made my way to my room.

* * *

A steady throb of a building headache plagued my temples as I sat at my desk filling out paperwork.

I was trying and failing to do something that would stop me from obsessing over the fact that the interest for Bella's whereabouts was dying down.

It made me want to scream at someone in fury, but that wouldn't help anyone, and if anything it would have the guys barring me from being included as the Chief in any further investigation.

Just as I finished my paperwork- barely aware of what I had written- Peter knocked on the door and entered.

I looked up at him and quickly took in his thin lips turned down at the corners and his furrowed brows, making his already deeply lined forehead crinkle further.

Peter had worked in the police department almost as long as I had, and although I wasn't as close to him as I was with Billy, Harry and Quil, we still got along well.

"Chief? We finished going through Bella's computer, and we found something that you might want to see."

I pushed myself away from my desk and went to see what they had found. Sitting down in Peter's chair, I took a look at Bella's computer and saw it was open on the sent items in her email account.

"What am I looking at?" I grunted impatiently.

"These start a week after the Cullens left Forks. All of them are addressed to Alice Cullen, and all of them have bounced back. It seems she deactivated her account."

"So?"

"Take a look at them Chief."

I did as he suggested, and my heart sunk at the initially desperate, and then increasingly despondent tone that dominated all of Bella's emails.

"What's the point of this Peter, it's not exactly a secret around here that Bella hasn't been herself since they left." My voice was gruff in an attempt to cover up the pain I felt at further proof of the bad state she had been in for months.

I had guessed that although on the outside she was barely functional, on the inside there was a miasma or hurt and self hating thoughts- to see the detailed evidence of in front of me had me forcefully breathing past the ache that was in my chest.

"Charlie, it's pretty obvious from this that she was... hung up on Edward Cullen right up until she went missing." Peter paused, knowing I wasn't going to like what he was about to say next, "has she ever shown an inclination to run off before? Any at all?"

I grit my teeth and snapped, "goddam it Peter, you know she didn't have any clothes missing from her room. No money. Nothing."

Peter took a step back, "I know that. But if one of the Cullens turned back up unexpectedly and asked her to come with them, can you tell me for sure that she wouldn't leave on the spot?"

I gripped the edge of the desk in front of me and bowed my head, swallowing the sharp words I wanted to hurl in Peter's face. I wanted to say no, more than anything, but I would be lying.

"About two months after she first got here, she ran off. She said she'd broken up with Edward Cullen. Afterward, he went to convince her to come back and succeeded. On her way she tripped and fell, then woke up in the hospital five days after she'd first left."

"So she's acted rashly in the past in response to Edward Cullen. It's not outside the realm of possibility that she ran away to him or his family."

I stood abruptly, "No! She'd have told me if she was doing that, Peter! She didn't _run away_ ," I spit the words like they were filthy.

Peter sighed and scratched the back of his neck, "I believe you Charlie. I _do_. But without solid proof that she's missing and not a runaway we can't keep putting all this effort into looking for her. You know how extreme teenagers can be around their first loves."

"Have you contacted the Cullens to check?" I demanded. Peter grimaced and nodded.

"We tried the number the hospital had to Carlisle Cullen's new work place. They said he doesn't work there. I got a fairly new receptionist, so my guess is that they moved again and she never met him. I've got nothing else Charlie. They left no number to call them on."

I kicked the chair away, and it clattered over with a loud noise, silencing the small amount of chatter I could hear in the station. I turned to face Peter again and jabbed an accusing finger at him, ignoring the angry tears collecting in the corners of my eyes.

"My daughter is missing," I hissed, " _missing_. She's not- she did not _run away_."

Peter looked at me helplessly and said nothing for a beat.

"I'm sorry Charlie."

Without another word, I pushed past Peter and stormed out of the station, slamming the door behind me. I got into my car and drove, without any direction in mind.

My hands clenched to steering wheel tightly and I struggled not to wordlessly yell.

Goddam it! She was not with the Cullens. She wouldn't have run without telling me _something_.

She could be out there still, needing someone to help her, except I didn't know how. Everything we had tried so far had led to dead ends and no answers.

What could I do? Interest was diminishing by the day. People were getting back on with their lives. The only person who was as eager to find Bella as I was, was Jacob.

A little doubt that I thought I had successfully squashed when we went through her clothes niggled at me though; what if she _was_ with the Cullens?

Their relationship had been so whirlwind, and shy, isolated, responsible Bella had become a lovestruck teenager in front of my eyes.

In some ways it had reminded me of Renée- something Bella had never done before.

She hadn't been the same mentally, since that boy had left, and for all that I had grown to hate him, Bella couldn't get over him.

If she was given a chance to be with him again, even if it meant she had to leave straight away, would she have taken it?

There was only one way for me to find out, and that was to find them.

I couldn't leave this be, until I had a solid answer from somebody about what happened to her.

With a hard set to my jaw, I turned to car around and drove in the direction of the hospital. They had the number of the hospital that Carlisle had worked at next, and even if he was no longer there, someone in that place should be able to tell me something about where he and his family had gone after that.

* * *

I pulled my car into the parking lot of the hospital, and marched my way toward the head doctor's office- who had replaced Carlisle Cullen when he left- at the direction of the receptionist.

Impatiently banging my fist on the door, and hardly waiting for an 'enter', I pushed the door open and approached the mildly bewildered looking man.

He leaned back in his chair and tilted his head, "Chief Swan, this is unexpected. Is there anything I can do for you?"

I crossed my arms, and with as blank an expression as I could muster said, "as you've no doubt heard, my daughter, Isabella Swan, went missing a few weeks ago. There's a possibility she's with the Cullen family. The problem is, we have no number for them. We were given the number of the hospital we were told Carlisle Cullen works at now, but when we called there, they told us he didn't. As you can imagine, this looks... odd."

The doctor nodded, evidently confused, "Yes. I don't understand how I can help you though."

"I'd like you to double check which hospital Mr. Cullen claimed to be going to, and if he left any way for you, or anyone you can think of, to get in contact with him or his family."

The doctor thought for a moment, before he brightened, "ah! As a matter of fact, he left me an address. I think I have the name and number of the hospital and their new address written on a piece of paper. It's around here somewhere. Just one second."

He rummaged hastily through the messy drawers of his desk for a minute, digging through chocolate wrappers shoved into the back of his drawer, before he pulled out a crumpled note with an 'aha!'.

He straightened the note out, before triumphantly handing it to me.

"Here you go. I hope this helps Chief Swan. Good luck finding your daughter."

I nodded once at him, "Thank you."

I turned to leave as quickly as I'd entered, and went home, the note, folded in my pocket, felt conspicuous- like it was heavier and bigger than it really was.

I didn't know if I wanted to find out Bella was with them, or not.

If she was, she had knowingly left, without a word, and hadn't cared to tell either Renée, Jake or me. That would just about break me. On the other hand, if she wasn't with them, she would still be missing and I'd be at another dead end.

As I parked my car in the driveway of my house, and exited the car, a flash of red out the corner of my eye caught my attention. I lifted my head and turned toward my house. Standing by the front door, was without a doubt the most beautiful woman I had ever seen.

She had flame red hair, that tumbled down her back like a barely tamed mane. She was incredibly pale- as pale as the Cullens- with lips almost as red as her hair. Even though she barely moved, the way she stood radiated a feral sort of grace. The way she held her shoulders back, her head high and her arms seemed to me to be ready to move in a moment. Her whole posture was an odd mixture of haughty, elegant and predatory.

She was captivating.

In a stunned stupor, I approached her. She watched me behind her sunglasses silently, an amused air around her. When I was a few steps away, she smiled at me. Or perhaps she bared her teeth. Or both. Either way, it was a wild, wicked thing.

* * *

 _Boom! Short and sweet I'm afraid. I don't think it will be too long before I update again for the next bit. I just couldn't resist a cliffhanger. Should I include an estimated timeline this is all happening? Or not bother?_

 _So where do you think Charlie's search for the Cullens will go? Will the Cullen find out Bella is missing because of it? What do you think will happen if they do?_

 _Will he be able to search at all? Or will Victoria keep him as her boy toy *cough* I mean, will she kill him? Why do you think she's there? Will Jake get there to see her? How will he react when he finds out she's been there?_

 _Will Jake be able to continue the balancing at he's got going on between wolfing out, and helping Charlie?_


	6. Femme fatale

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the general plot and OCs

In reality this was only half of the chapter, but since I'm having difficulty writing in between studying, I thought I'd at least help you down from that cliff you're all hanging over.

So for all the readers who intend to stick around for the whole journey, I thought I'd explain a little bit about the intended length and layout of the story.

1\. I don't think I know how to write even a medium length story. This is going to end up being epic in length. 2. For any of you who are familiar with anime (or manga I think, I don't read them) and the way they're written in arcs, this is similar. Or at least it is in my plan, I don't know if that'll translate the same into actually writing. 3. This is still very early on on in the first arc. Also there are four arcs. All of them will probably be much longer than the first one. 5. Apart from details for the Cullens, arc 1 is planned fairly well, the other three still have quite loose plots for many of the characters.

I think that's all for now. By the way, I do actually quite like Victoria as a character, once I found out about her history. So she'll be sticking around at least for a while to continue doing some no good nasty things to the others.

No Beta btw! No beta for poor deprived me. So silly mistakes likely easily found.

* * *

 **(Victoria pov)**

Standing at the girl's doorstep, I revelled in my triumph. It was all so easy for me to trick the dogs into a false sense of complacency.

All it had required was a bit of patience. And by god did I have patience. I could keep testing and poking and prodding and observing those beasts for years.

It was amazing how much they didn't realise they were giving away about themselves in their reactions to me.

For one; they were predictable in that they were reactive only. There were never any preemptive measures to hold me off, and no deviations from their movements outside of my presence.

It had been so simple to trick them into thinking I was the same as them in my predictability, until we were locked in a stalemate of approach, attack, evade, retreat.

As long as I maintained that pattern, those fools didn't even consider that I was doing something different outside of our interactions. And in the meantime, all I needed to do was run for a day North, and circle around to hit Forks from the East.

Child's play.

The only issue, of course, was the hideous smell of wet dog that radiated from the house.

Evidently, one of those dogs was here regularly. I hadn't known that. In fact, my knowledge about the state of things outside of the dog pack was frustratingly inadequate at this point in time.

Laurent had never gotten back to me, after I had sent him to find out what I couldn't- not without blaring my intentions for all to see. I suspected he was dead.

Well, he had better be dead. Bastard didn't even have the courtesy of warning me about the beasts.

Not that it mattered now. I was here to get the answers he hadn't given me. Such as where the hell were the Cullens?

I had half expected them to be there to head me off before I even got close to their precious human mate. What with the midget's ability to see the future once someone's mind had been made up.

Nothing. When I had checked the Cullen house, it was abandoned. From the smell of it, it had been for some time.

But that wasn't what had had me quietly raging; it smelt like the girl hadn't been around their house since the same length of time either.

So here I was, at the girl's home, with her weeks old scent half buried under wet dog, and no sign of any of the people I wanted dead.

I was going to get the information I was looking for. And if I left a trail of broken bodies behind me in order to get them, well, that bitch should be all the more terrified by it.

* * *

With a pair of sunglasses on to hide the rose red of my eyes, I waited by the house until I heard the approaching sound of a car, slowing down as it got closer.

I took care to pretend to breathe, and to subtly shift a few muscles every few moments. It didn't come naturally to me, and I probably didn't quite get it right, but I had never had the need to fake mortality before.

It was almost ridiculous, how unobservant the human blood bag was, as he failed to notice me until he had already exited his vehicle. I suppressed my contemptuous amusement at his awed and flabbergasted expression once he noticed me.

Human men. They were all the same. Allowing their thoughts, actions and desires to be dominated by a beautiful face and feminine curves. Worthless.

He gracelessly staggered toward me, his eyes never once leaving me. The image of a thirsty human without a drop to drink stumbling toward a river flashed through my mind in comparison. My lips twitched and blossomed into an unwitting grin, at the visible proof of his human inferiority.

God, it was almost pitiful, how easy it was to ensnare this man.

I tempered my mouth into the shape of a polite smile edged with flirtation, watching with hidden contempt as his eyes snapped toward it.

"Mr. Swan? My name is Viola. I apologise for showing up at your house without warning."

With a slight, demure, lowering of my lashes and eyes, he stumbled over himself to reassure me.

"N-no, no. It's- it's fine! No problem at all. What can I do for you?"

I falsely hesitated for a moment, biting my lip softly. His pupils expanded and a small thrill ran through me.

"I'm looking for some friends of mine, and I was hoping your daughter would know where they were. Except... I apologise if this is insensitive, but from what I've heard around town, she hasn't been here for weeks."

My words seemed to shock him back to reality, and he visibly winced when I mentioned the girl.

He heaved a weary sigh and rubbed his forehead as he thought for a moment, looking off to the side. Coming to a decision, he mustered a friendly look, which grew warm spots on his cheeks when he made eye contact with me again.

"Why don't you come in, and I'll see if I can't give you some help with your problem. Bella won't be able to, you see. She's..." he swallowed painfully, "she's missing."

Oh? This changed things slightly. If this blood bag didn't know where my prey had gone, there was a small chance that she was a vampire.

The Cullens could well have bitten her and taken her with them. After all, she was a liability as a human mate.

But I had been hunting her under the assumption that she was human still. If she wasn't, then things would be a little more difficult. I couldn't just find her and catch her off guard. I'd need back up.

Before I made the mistake of any more assumptions though, I needed to know everything the pathetic mortal had to say.

"Thank you Mr. Swan. You're very kind," I gratefully replied to his offer.

Was I laying it on too thick? No, the fool was eating up my words with a bashful reddening of his neck.

"Call me Charlie, miss-"

"Just Viola, then Charlie."

I stepped aside, allowing Charlie to fumble with his keys, evidently struggling to tear his eyes from my face as he opened the door and awkwardly held it open for me.

Giving him a thankful nod, I entered the house. Immediately, the almost overwhelming stench of wet dog slapped me in the face. I allowed, briefly, a thankful thought that the human had let me enter first, hiding my expression of feral revulsion at the scent from him.

My instincts were yelling at me that I was in enemy territory, without a solid escape plan. I forced my body to relax from the posture that it wanted to crouch into, and masked the disgusted snarl on my face into a something less alarming.

I heard him closed the door behind him, and turned to him for direction. He paused at the sight of my face once more, a flicker of disbelief crossing him. I had seen this enough times to know that he couldn't believe I was as stunning as he had thought at first.

It was difficult for humans to not doubt their own memories if they were alive after interaction with a vampire. Our beauty, grace, entrancing voices. It all seemed so unreal to them.

After just over two and half seconds, he cleared throat awkwardly, as red crept once more up his neck. I almost sighed impatiently, but maintained my genial expression and pretended not to notice his amazed staring.

"Uh- uhm, the kitchen is just through here. We can sit at the table. Would you like anything to drink?" He led me to the kitchen as he spoke.

"No thank you, Charlie." To my amusement, he shivered as I purred his name.

I sat at the kitchen table and analysed him as he avoided facing me by pouring himself a glass of water. It was clear to me by the hard beating of his heart, that he was fighting against his attraction to me before he spoke once more.

I was tempted to play further with him like a cat with a mouse, before tearing him apart. But I restrained myself. As humorous as it would be to push him as far as he could go and watch him fall apart just from my words and then more literally with my teeth, I was here for a reason.

Unfortunately I needed him sound in mind and body in order to fulfil that, despite the rather delectable smell of his blood.

He cleared his throat once more, and with a deep, calming breath, he turned to me and sat down. He appeared momentarily surprised by my still present sunglasses, but easily dismissed it.

"You said you were looking for friends of yours? If they were anyone in Forks, I'm sure there are a lot of people who'd be able to help you there."

I shook my head regretfully, "I'm afraid not. They were in Forks until a few months ago, as far as I can tell. I got the impression when I last visited, that the Cullens kept to themselves in terms of their private lives. With the exception of your daughter."

Confirmation revealed itself in his expression, and I knew then that he'd suspected already who the 'friends' I was looking for were.

Perhaps he was a little sharper than I had given him credit for then. Did he know about the supernatural? I didn't think he did, considering the lack of fear from him at the sight of me, but one of the overgrown dogs was clearly living here.

The moment he showed he was concealing knowledge of what I was, and playing his own game in this conversation I'd rip his throat out, and leave his entrails draped across the room as a pretty present for the dog to come home to.

"I'm sorry to say then, that even if Bella was around, she wouldn't be able to help you. You see, the... young Cullen she was dating broke up with her before they left."

I was taken aback by this information, and I knew it showed. Broke up? That was one of the last things I would have guessed.

She was his mate. Mates don't simply... _break up_. They were for eternity. Was she not his mate after all? But his extreme reaction in the face of her in danger had shown all the indications of her being his mate.

Regardless of whether she was his mate or not, her death warrant had been signed the day my James, my safety, the centre of my whole world for so long, had been killed because of that bitch.

"Broke up?" I made myself sound confused, hesitant, "but they seemed so... in love."

The human snorted contemptuously, and once more my surprise showed on my face.

"My Bella may have been hopelessly in love with that boy. But he was all too happy to drop her the moment he lost interest, without warning, and move. Probably off wherever he and his family have moved, doing the same to the next poor girl."

This time the loathing he held for the mind reader was evident. It was obvious that he believed the words he was speaking, but the problem was that he was talking about a coven of vampires.

There was no guarantee he was actually speaking the truth. I had to discern what was fact and what was story he had been fed in order to cover up supernatural secrets.

"I'm sorry, that must have been hard for you both to deal with. I'd never been given the impression that he was like that before. It's a shame, he's always been so... polite."

I leaned forward, with a compassionate smile, and allowed my hand to slide closer to his across the table, without being close enough to touch. His pupils expanded once more, and his heart picked up, but he manfully suppressed any reaction more than that.

"Thanks. You- you knew the Cullens long then?" He asked, looking slightly concerned at the reminder I'd claimed them as friends.

I nodded, "They're old friends of the family. I'm fairly sure Carlisle Cullen is a distant cousin actually, but my mother never clarified if that's true before she died. I'm closer to Carlisle and his wife than the kids, thanks to the age difference. But I know them all quite well."

The lies slipped off my tongue as fluidly and easily as the truth, after so many lifetimes of practice. I forced a look filled with barely suppressed grief on my face, and clenched my fist.

"Father died last month. I don't have siblings, or any other relatives. The Cullens are all I have now. We fell out of contact after I saw them last year. Father was so ill and there was so much to deal with all of a sudden... I was just overwhelmed I suppose."

I looked up, to see Charlie's understanding gaze filled with his own memories laid over my words, and for just one moment, I felt inexplicably guilty at the lie I had chosen and returned my eyes to the table in order to continue.

"I couldn't get hold of them for the funeral. I spent a little while tying up loose ends back home, and then came here to find them, once I still couldn't get hold of them after that either. I don't know where they went, and I was hoping Bella would know... but I see now that it was a dead end."

I hoped that with the sharing of my own 'painful story' the mortal would share his own. It would be easier and more likely to ensure I had all the facts I needed, than torture.

As I suspected, he grimaced in the face of his pained sorrow and gave me what I wanted to know.

"The Cullens moved last September, near the beginning of the month. The boy broke up with her the same day I think. No warning at all. Everyone was surprised. After that... well you weren't wrong in that Bella was head over heels for that boy. I think she thought he was the one or something.

"When he left her in those woods, it was like he took her spirit with him. She just... curled up and forgot how to live. I don't think if she was asked, she'd remember those months afterward. Not much. You know, sometimes I'd be talking to her- at her, for an hour, just anything to get her to open up without pressuring her. I'd sit there forcing myself to keep finding things to say, and sometimes at first I let myself get pretty emotional, and then half way through a sentence, she'd just... get up and walk away.

"I realised she didn't even know I was talking. She was too caught up in whatever was killing her inside her own head. She started getting better though, recently. She seemed more focused and present to what was going on around her.

"She began to hang out with a friend from the Rez nearby. He was good for her for a little while. Then about a month ago I think they had a falling out of some sort. She went for a hike in the woods alone, and we haven't seen her since.

"We found her truck, none of her clothes are missing besides what she was wearing. But her phone is gone, although it's not picking up calls, and she's gone too."

There were a few seconds of silence as his words settled around us, and I strung my next sentence together to appear sympathetic, but not wholly interested in continuing on the topic of 'poor Bella suffering' after being dropped like the waste she was.

As much as I delighted in hearing any pain the useless thing felt, if it wasn't a tale of her tormented and tortured for days on end, screaming until her throat was torn to shreds and she had more of her insides on the outside, before she finally died, then I wasn't satisfied or interested in hearing more.

"Was she in contact with the Cullens at all? I hate to cast any accusations anywhere they don't belong, Charlie, but if she believed herself so in love months later, there may be a chance she went to them."

The man grit his teeth for a moment, and worked his jaw angrily before he spoke.

"I can't say she didn't go to them. Not for sure. I don't know where her head was at enough, to say for certain she wouldn't have jumped on the chance. But... I don't want to believe she'd do that to me without at least making up some excuse, even a damn note, about where she was going.

"But she wasn't in contact with them before hand. I can say that with confidence. She wouldn't have been in the space she was in for so long if one them had just had the... if one of them had just talked to her every now and then."

It occurred to me momentarily, that perhaps Laurent did come across her and took off with her, rather than merely scout the area like I asked.

I quickly dismissed the idea- not just because contemplating that would send me into a rage I couldn't afford right now, but also because Laurent had found himself a mate, and for all that he was a fickle coward, he wouldn't abandon her, like running off with someone so weak would require him to do in order to escape me.

He may have killed her though. That would be something I could imagine him doing; coming across her, and killing her as a 'mercy kill'.

Or perhaps those wolves had come across her hiking and torn her to pieces.

I would be disgruntled if that was the case- either of them- but ultimately the only way to know for sure was to make sure the remaining likely option wasn't true, which was if she was with the Cullens.

"I don't suppose you have any idea how I can find them? I imagine you would be looking to speak to them too. At this point, I think any information we can give each other would probably be a help."

Charlie sat across from me, watching me, debating with himself. I gave him a half hopeful half resigned expression. Whatever he saw, had him coming to the decision to reach into his pocket.

A crinkle of paper reached my ears, before a folded up note was placed onto the table. I looked at him questioningly.

"This is the name of the hospital the Carlisle Cullen left with the person who replaced him, as well as an address to reach them. I haven't had a chance to follow either of them up yet. Do you recognise either of these, perhaps one of the Cullens mentioned one of them to you before?"

I eagerly picked up the note and read it, pretending to take great consideration over both pieces of information. Of course I didn't recognise them, but I did commit them to memory. Eventually I regretfully shook my head with a mild scowl.

"I'm really sorry, Charlie, I don't recognise either. I wish I could be more of a help here."

I handed the note back to him, which immediately went back into his pocket.

"No, no, it's fine, Viola. It was a long shot anyway. I'll be looking into this in the next couple of days, so I'll have more answers then, hopefully."

I looked uncertainly at my hands and bit my lip as I thought for a moment, before tentatively suggesting, "if I give you my number... perhaps we could check in on how far the other has gotten? Two heads being better than one and all that. You could double check anything you find out with my own knowledge, and anything I find that you might be better suited to taking further, and may lead you to Bella... I don't know if you're open to that. I imagine you're busy, but..."

"I think that's a great idea," he quickly responded, making me push back a smirk.

"Excellent! Let me write my number down for you. Just send me a text and sign your name, so I know it's you."

I ended up writing a number on the same note that contained the Cullen address and hospital name on it, due to a lack of paper around.

All for the better probably- I had no doubt he'd be checking that note over and over again. Each time, my number would be there as a reminder, nagging at him to contact me.

It was a risk, getting so close to the search for the Cullens and Bella, and I knew it. If she was with them, it would almost certainly tip them off that I was coming for them all- my description was too obvious despite the name change.

Even if she wasn't with them, the Cullens could still hold enough affection for any of the humans here to come back to Forks.

Hell, even if they didn't care about a single human here, they could come back anyway, to deal with me in case I intended to be a threat to them. If they chose to return here, it would be next to impossible for me to handle both the dogs and the Cullens at the same time.

And even if they didn't return, that didn't change the fact that I wanted the dogs dealt with. They were a thorn in my side I was resentful about- especially now I knew they had hindered my ability to find out all that I just learnt.

I wanted them all ripped apart and dead. Not only that, but I wanted them ripped to pieces emotionally too, if I could get away with it. After all, there was chance they had taken my prey from me on top of being such irritants.

It didn't matter too much if the girl was dead already. There was a possibility that it wouldn't affect the Cullens at all, if they left her behind as easily as they did. I still wanted her gone more than the others- I had committed to it now, and I would see it through. But the original purpose of her agonising death, was the resulting suffering of the Cullen coven.

I'd have to deal with the coven separately, then. No matter which way I looked at it, I was facing a large number of opponents more powerful than me. I'd need more numbers on my side.

I needed numbers loyal to me, and willing to fight my fight unquestioningly. That wasn't easy to come by as a vampire by any means. Beyond one obvious method...

My eyes snapped up to the vulnerable human in front of me. Hmm.

He was putting my number into his phone, oblivious to the danger he was in. He was a decent specimen. It would certainly tick the boxes of emotionally hurting one of the wolves, if the heavy scent layered over the house was any indication.

Watching someone they knew well, and likely loved, on the other side of battle to them, recognising them only as beasts to destroy. It would certainly hurt one of them at least.

To be killed by or have to kill someone they cared about would work. It would be a win win. It's not like he'd be able to control himself as a Newborn.

He smelt good, but not so mouthwatering that I'd be unable to stop after I bit him.

For all that he would be useful in helping to search for the others I wanted to see dead, did I really need him all that much? Would he not serve better as my first foot soldier? I could use him to keep the others in control when I bit them.

Perhaps I could even convince him we were mates. Make him fall in love with me, and loyally kill his own daughter for me, if she was still alive. It's not like he'd remember her all that well.

I had almost convinced myself to bite him then and there, but then he looked up at me and made eye contact.

For the first time, I saw him as something like a person, rather than just a blood bag and body for me to use for my purposes. I saw his weary but determined eyes. I saw the weight he carried on his shoulders, but refused to fall under. I saw the love he held for the girl I wanted to kill.

I realised that I was sitting in front of a parent who held an unrelenting, loyal love for his family. It sparked a memory- a tiny spark of a memory before I ruthlessly squashed it again. I remembered, for less than a split second, a time when I saw eyes like that look at me, and _include_ me. A time when I was so happy and free. Such a short length of time, so long ago. And then the memory was gone, almost before it could truly form.

But the echoes lingered, and I felt distinctly caught off guard. I desperately held onto my half seductive, half grateful mask, in order to hide how shaken I felt.

All of a sudden I wanted nothing more than to get away from this man who had made me feel so off balance, without really doing anything.

"I should go," I barely clung to my composure, "I have to travel a little way, and I'd like to make it before dark, if I can."

He tripped over himself, to thank me for coming, to tell me how grateful he was for my offer of help and lead me to the door. But I hardly registered any of that. I just wanted to get out, and leave. Now.

I was just mindful enough to stand a few feet apart from him, in order to discourage contact.

"Thank you for taking the time to listen, Charlie. I'm really appreciative. Keep me updated in your search for Bella, I didn't know her for long, but she definitely made a big impact for the few days I was around."

"I will do. Good luck in your own search, Viola. Drive safe, now."

I gave him a somewhat distracted nod and smile, before I eagerly turned and began walking away, carefully keeping myself at human speeds until I was out of sight, before I frantically began to _runrunrun_ , refusing to admit to myself what I was running from.

I couldn't afford to indulge in these emotions and memories now. I had an army to build.

* * *

 _Et Voilà! Just to comfort everyone, at least in the first arc, there will be no main character deaths. Main characters are the ones who get consistent povs. I make no promises for any other character or arcs, mainly because it's not all fully planned yet._

 _Also there'll be some Jake next chapter._

 _How do you think he'll react to Victoria being near Charlie? Will he tell Charlie the truth? How will the wolf pack respond to this change in Victoria's actions? Will the Cullens find out? Will Jake support Charlie in finding the Cullens?_

 _What will the Cullens prioritise; Bella missing and in danger or a leak in their secret that may kill them all int he future?_


	7. Pack of lies

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the general plot and OCs

Back again lovelies! Can I just say it's crazy how supportive you all are! Thank you everyone!

So once more, a new character introduced. Not someone who's a main character, but someone who I think has massive potential as a character. I'm really looking forward to exploring them. Also, almost everyone's a hypocrite; we find things people do annoying when we sometimes do them. We say things to people we wouldnt want said to us. We point out other people's flaws and mistakes when we are exactly the same. This new relationship is basically set up based upon some much needed hypocrisy.

It's not got a lot of action in it, but then again I don't think I've written a chapter yet that has got a lot of that. Also the second half I wrote when I was getting very tired, and because I can't check for plot holes and lack of making sense when I'm tired, you'll notice how I 'cleverly' excused that away by making my characters create plans whilst tired themselves.

Further exploration of Jacob, my little ball of fluffy angst. He's at a pivotal stage of growing up in his life, so sometimes he's still gonna be a whiny teenage brat, and others he won't at this point.

My exams finish mid June, so there won't be another chapter until sometime after that.

No beta to check this stuff so excuse me for somehow creating such an angelic masterpiece despite that

Thats all for now: on with the show!

* * *

 **(Jake pov)**

The sun sank low over Emily's house, as I sat on her front step flicking bits of dirt and pebbles across the ground in front of me. I determinedly kept my eyes lowered to the floor and avoided looking at the display of love and devotion occurring a few meters to my right.

It wasn't as though Jared and Kim were doing anything particularly overt, but conveyed by the subtle way their bodies constantly leaned toward each other, the small coy smiles to the large ecstatic grins, the softness of their expressions.

Above all it was the way they looked at each other; the awe in Jared's eyes, like he struggled to look away for any length of time, and the way Kim looked back, like she couldn't believe she was so lucky and had to keep checking it was real.

I didn't want to see any of it, and the mood I was in didn't encourage me to speak to the others in the pack, who were by the front of the house too, catching the the small amount of sun that had managed to overpower the clouds today.

When Jared had imprinted, the others had been shocked but happy for him. Heck, I was too. I hadn't been able to help but notice with some indignation, though, at the immediate importance Jared's Kim was given, in comparison to Bella.

It was a shitty reality that the love I felt was less... valid, in the eyes of the pack, because I hadn't officially imprinted. The cocktail of emotions I'd felt when confronted by that was something I tried to keep away from Jared and Kim, so as not to mar what they had.

A fist full of knuckles dug painfully into my scalp and jolted me unpleasantly out of my thoughts. I jerked away and scowled over my shoulder, as Leah stalked past me impatiently.

"Come on loser, we're going patrolling," she called to me, as she turned and began walking backward.

Her voice brooked no protest, clearly relaying Sam's orders, but I allowed myself a groan.

"Seriously?" She raised an indignant eyebrow at us all, "none of you got that reference?"

There was a blank pause, in which we simultaneously tried to understand what the hell she was talking about, and attempted to comprehend what seemed to be Leah in a semi decent mood for once.

She rolled her eyes at us and sneered, "figures."

"Get a move on you two," Sam's voice interrupted whatever she was about to say next, from inside the house. At the sound of him speaking, whatever imitation of humanity Leah was going for immediately collapsed, leaving behind a Leah we were all regrettably familiar with; scathing, caustic, acrimonious, abrasive, vitriolic, acerbic.

And of course my favourite; Bitch.

"Fine," she spat angrily. I wasn't even surprised anymore by the amount of dissatisfaction and contempt she managed to fit into one word.

She brushed past Embry, with a fierce scowl marring her face, "come on, move it," she snapped.

I rolled my eyes, and resisted the urge to respond. The other guys gave me sympathetic looks, but I wasn't fooled; they were glad it was me and not them.

Ever since Leah had phased into a wolf for the first time, she'd been a complete unapologetic nightmare. It was hell to run the perimeter of our territory with her. She was bitter, spiteful, rude, and delighted in making cutting comments on other people's thoughts.

When faced with frustration at her attitude, she was obvious in her vicious pleasure at burying everyone in her own angered resentment.

In response to sympathy, she replied with malicious remarks.

It was lose lose with her, and I had run out of the little patience I'd had to even try to get along. Even when I attempted neutral indifference, she insisted on making pointed jabs at my thoughts, until I wanted to wrap my teeth around her neck.

The only person she was even worse toward was Sam. But unlike me, Sam could do his best to avoid her, and make me deal with her instead.

So far, every time he should have been on patrol with either of us, he'd stuck us together with an excuse that he needed to do something else.

Of course, generally they were legitimate excuses, it just meant that I got a double dose of Leah that I could really do without.

Quickly removing my shorts and strapping them to my leg with the cord we all had, I phased and followed the path she had taken.

Immediately, I was aware of the connection between our minds, and was half distracted by the snarling mental voice that was Leah.

~You got a problem with running patrols with me, you can take it up with our barely benevolent dictator, asshole. I'm sure he'd give more of a crap about your whining than the zero that I give.~

I mentally scoffed, irritated but refusing to reply.

I would have spent a hell of lot more time complaining about it, except apparently it was my payment for Sam letting me do my thing around Bella and Charlie.

Ever since he had first forbidden me from using my wolf form to track Bella, he hadn't mentioned the topic again. Even when I refused to do patrols during the day, in order to help Charlie, he had merely nodded once and moved on.

It was unusual for him not to clamp down on those sort of demands with reminders of our priorities to the pack, and the fact that he was in charge, but for whatever reason, even when confronted with complaints and teasing remarks that my thoughts overwhelmingly focused on Bella, he said nothing.

It was an unstated agreement between us, that in return for Sam stepping back and not getting in the way of my dedication to finding Bella, I had to put up with Leah more than anyone else.

And apparently Leah had to put up with me. At least according to her thoughts, as she mentally glared at me and huffed disdainfully whilst we ran.

~Don't kid yourself, Jake~ she sneered, in response to my thoughts ~they're all just as eager to avoid you as they are me.~

I mentally rolled my eyes at her ~let's just get this patrol over with. Hopefully tomorrow we won't be stuck with each other again.~

~Fat chance of that~ she snorted to herself, not impressed with Sam's poorly hidden attempt at avoiding the exhausting place that was Leah's mind.

To be honest, one of the things I found the least dislikable about Leah was her continued irreverence in the face of Sam's 'alpha-ness'.

It wasn't that the man was a bad Alpha exactly, or even that he was unfair, it was just that he could be a hard ass about obedience.

It didn't seem to grate on anyone the way it did Leah and I. Leah railed against his leadership for obvious reasons, and so Sam generally gave her a bit of leeway for all the good it did him, but he always had a close eye on me and it often had me bristling.

We kept things pretty civil, due to the fact that we both tried our best to get along, but there was always an unspoken tension between us, as though one serious argument would break our brittle relationship apart.

So sometimes, it was nice to see someone not only willing but able to go off at Sam and vent at him, throwing all the things he did wrong in his face that I carefully didn't say.

Leah's 'dulcet' tones interrupted my thoughts-she was very good at that, ~you're good at lying to yourself, you know that Jake?~

~What are you talking about?~

~You know very well that you're just as able as I am to give Sam a piece of your goddam mind. You're just too much of a coward to rock the boat.~

~Oh what, compared to you who makes everyone miserable every time you open your mouth?~ I rebutted.

~That's not what I'm talking about and you know it, you idiot. You're more than happy to criticise and resent Sam in your head, and then act self pitying that nothing changes, whilst hiding behind someone like me who actually has the balls to say something about what I think.

~You tell yourself it's just because he would shut _you_ down and not _me_ , but first of all Sam's not as authoritarian as you like to pretend he is, and second of all even if he was you're in the unique position to do something about it. You're just too scared.~

~So you're a fan of Sam's now? Sticking up for him like he doesn't have the entire council doing that?~

~I'm not even going to give that pathetic taunt the ridicule it deserves.~ Leah scoffed.

~Whatever, why don't you just shut up and focus on the patrol,~ I snapped defensively.

For the next half an hour we flew through the trees, with Leah's thoughts an indistinct murmur in the background. I tried to lose myself in the blur of dappled greens and browns, in the rich scents of the forest, that for all my struggle with the lifestyle shifting had cost me, I adored as my second home.

There was nothing like racing in this powerful body, that took so long to tire, with the wind buffeting my face and ruffling through my fur. I could feel my muscles pumping and shifting underneath my skin, and the ground very lightly give way under my paws.

If it didn't come with so many drawbacks, I think I'd love being a werewolf.

But as it was there were more negatives to being this way than positives, and my mind was drawn back into what Leah had said, about acting self pitying about nothing changing when I could do something about it.

My lips pulled back slightly in remembered offence. She was wrong. There was nothing I could do. Even if I took on being Alpha like Leah seemed to think I should, all the problems that came with being a werewolf would stay.

School was a pointless mundanity now that I was a wolf, and leaving for college wasn't an option. There was nothing I could do about being a wolf in itself whilst leeches were hanging around, nothing I could do about the supernatural secrets I now knew about. Even the red head parasite alluded us despite our best efforts. There had been no inroads to finding Bella. My relationship with my dad was now and forevermore coloured by the lens of werewolves, duty and hierarchy.

This was it for me. For the rest of my life, it would be something like what I had now.

It was all a messed up situation that made me all the more hateful that this crap had happened to me, and there was nothing I could to do about it.

Stuck in the rez, no prospects, Bella missing, my relationship with my dad filled with unresolved tension, harassed by a red head parasite.

These facts seem to circle round and round my head despairingly.

It sucked.

Being paired with Leah was the sucky cherry on top.

I felt for her, and the loss she was going through with her Dad, and the familiar anger most of us felt at having our lives so shaken up and surrounded by secrecy, because of our transformation. I felt for her feelings of isolation at being the first and only female wolf.

But at the end of the day, I still had a limited amount of sympathy I could express, when she insisted on dealing with her problems by making everyone else feel like shit when they were around her.

Seth was the only one that got a free ride from her bitchiness. But that was because he was her little brother, and he was dealing with his own guilt and grief from their dad's death, which was making him struggle with maintaining his human form.

~Oh my God, Jacob, would you shut the hell up!? You're like a goddam little ball of self pity and angst! It's nauseating!~

~Yeah? And you're a huge ball of hypocrisy!~

~Ooh learning some big words there, Jake. Careful, don't give yourself an aneurism. Actually you know what, go ahead and have one, maybe it would give everyone a rest from the constant look-at-me-I'm-just-an-angsty-little-victim vibe you love to drown everyone in, as you somehow manage to find something wrong in every bit of your life. Heck you even resent Seth and I for shifting when we did because according to you Quil should have gone next.~

I growled at her loudly, but refused to reply in the hope that she'd leave me the hell alone. She was such a hypocrite, talking like people couldn't wait for me to leave, when more often than not everyone heaved a sigh of relief when she was out of the room.

No one was as sour and dislikable to be around as Leah. She marked slightly above bloodsuckers and my sisters, when it was 'code red' week for both of them at the same time.

Of course, I didn't have to reply in order to give Leah bitch fuel, when she could read my mind.

~Sour and dislikable? That's rich coming from you, 'Jake I-can't-think-about-anything-but-depressive-thoughts-about-some-dead-girl Black'.~

Even though she was goading me to cover up the increasing ire she'd felt in response to my thoughts, and I knew it, I couldn't help but be riled by her.

~She's _not dead_! She's missing! Bella's not just some girl and you know it Leah, she's mine! My imprint! So shut up about it.~

Not like Leah would know what it was like to have someone like that. After all, she and Sam couldn't have been that in love if they didn't turn out to be imprinted to each other. She couldn't understand.

The moment that flashed through my thoughts though, my stomach tightened in regret. Partially because I knew it was such a sore topic for her, and partially because of the way Leah was going to react.

One of the most annoying, if somewhat admirable, qualities about Leah was that harsh put downs and hurt feelings didn't make her back down like most other girls I'd met. Instead she fought back twice as viciously.

~Your _imprint_ ~ she mocked ~a girl who never showed you a second of attraction. It's sad how easily you lied to yourself that you ever had a chance with her. Look at the facts, asshole. You fell for the first pretty white face that smiled at you, and then followed after her like a panting dog, as she strung you along to get what she wanted out of you.

~She wasn't _interested_ in you Jake. It's so obvious from your memories that you were just a distraction for her. She wanted someone blind to her faults, who wouldn't get fed up of the fact that she was broken, depressed and pining after the leech that she let fuck her before he got bored.

~You probably made her feel good about herself, so she kept you around. And you fell for it unquestioningly, like an idiot. You were so desperate to get your dick wet in sweet little Bella, that you've actually convinced yourself she's your imprint.

~It's sickening how deep in your own delusions you are, and apparently I'm the only one man enough in the pack to tell it to you straight. But trust me, Jake, they've all been thinking it.~

My previous regret curdled in my stomach, into hurt and anger. The only thing that stopped me from lashing out at her and _making_ her shut up, was the pain that had shot through her, before her vitriolic words came spewing into my head.

That and the fact that underlying all of her anger and bitterness, was a deep endless pit of grief that she continuously suppressed and avoided.

At the end of the day, perhaps I was a coward, but I'd rather deal with the angry Leah I knew, than a crying mournful Leah who's thoughts and emotions I had direct access to.

She was _wrong_ , though. She was so wrong. I knew she was. I loved Bella, and she was my imprint. Even if no one in the pack would believe me.

They were all wrong. And screw it, even if they weren't, Bella was one of my best goddam friends and there was no way I was ever going to give up on her until I'd found her.

It infuriated me that nothing I said or thought or felt seemed to convince them, it was just another area of my life in which I felt powerless and like no matter what I did nothing changed.

If I never found Bella, I wouldn't even have the one bright spot that Sam and now Jared got to have. I wouldn't be able to bring myself to have another girl when I knew Bella should be the one for me.

No family or kids. No future.

I was so focused on my internal musings, I almost missed the pang from Leah at my thoughts on Jared and Sam.

Curiously, and somewhat bitterly, I shifted my attention onto her.

Leah had been quiet about Jared imprinting too, and I'd wondered if it was for the similar reasons as I had maintained my distance.

I was taken aback at what I saw; Leah had noticed the cautious eye Sam kept on both Jared and Kim and their developing relationship, to ensure the what had happened to Emily didn't occur to Kim.

I felt Leah's wistful sorrow that she'd never have that.

I felt her blame toward the fact that she'd been destined to phase into a wolf, as being the reason why she'd been ineligible to be Sam's imprint when he had phased himself.

After all, the going theory was that imprints ensured strong offspring, and Leah was now infertile. If she couldn't carry children, there was therefore no reason for her to able to imprint at all.

I felt her deep grief for all the lost chances at love she now had. She'd have to sabotage any potential relationship with a secret she would never gain permission from the Alpha to share; not when there was no chance at children, and no chance at imprinting.

I felt her loathing at everything that being a wolf had taken from her, as she was now stuck watching everything she could never have, every day for the rest of her life, with no reprieve.

With a jolt, she snapped herself out of the melancholy spiral of thoughts and snarled at me defensively.

~Leah...~ I trailed off, not sure what to say about the vulnerability I had just witnessed.

~Shut up~ she bristled, but it was weak, and without much of her usual heat ~just shut up, Jake. I don't need poorly disguised pity. Especially not from someone as pathetic as you.~

I was silent for a moment, shaken and disquieted by what I had witnessed/felt. There was nothing I could say to that, that she would accept.

There was no apology that she deserved to have which was for me to give. At the end of the day, I wasn't sure I would apologise if I could. Leah may have been hurting for multiple valid reasons, but so were the rest of us, so was I, and unlike us Leah was spiteful and selfish in her suffering. Why would I apologise when I was hardly inclined to even forgive?

Eventually, I focussed back on our joint task of patrolling- what little time we had left.

She too retreated as much as was possible from my head, and kept to herself for the majority of the perimeter run.

It was the first time I'd had a proper reprieve from her since she'd phased weeks ago. I didn't dare hope to myself that it would be a little more like this going forward.

I was so tired all the time these days. If we could just take down the parasite, we could tone down the patrols so that I could catch up on some of the sleep I was aching for.

If Sue Clearwater wasn't staying with dad, and looking after him, I didn't know how I'd have time for everything even with the lack of sleep.

They were good for each other though, being two of Harry's closest people. At least for now, they could comfort each other in their grief.

It also gave me a good excuse to continue staying with Charlie; the one person in my life I could be reasonably relaxed around.

Even though there was always the secret of my shifting and the existence of vampires between us, Charlie had a way of lifting my burdens and responsibilities off me, at least for a time.

I was once more lost fairly deep in thought, when Paul and Embry shifted to let us know our patrol was over.

Leah grumbled wearily that the patrols were practically useless, when we all knew the leech only tested us every three or so days. Even though I knew it was an overconfident thing to say, I couldn't help but agree with her.

Despite the fact that we couldn't seem to pin it down, the bloodsucker was at least fairly easy to hold off. It never got near to where anyone lived, and it'd never even gone on the attack, even though it was obvious evasive manoeuvres weren't getting the leech whatever it was the thing was after.

We might as well on patrol every three days because the bloodsucker was like clockwork.

Nevertheless, I felt obliged to back Embry up when he cautioned Leah.

~Even though it's been predictable so far, we shouldn't underestimate it.~

~Us getting complacent might be exactly what the vampire is looking for,~ I added.

She huffed at us (me) in contempt, but didn't say anything further, as she approached her home and shifted back.

* * *

Just over a minute later, I was in the tree line by my own home. I could hear Sue sleeping inside, and my dad still awake watching TV.

Was it still home to me? I only really checked in once a day for as short a time as possible. And sometimes not even that, before I left for Forks.

Slipping my shorts on, I quietly walked inside and looked in on my dad. At the sound of the door shutting behind me, his head snapped up, his half lidded eyes taking me in.

"Hey Jake," he smiled tiredly.

I ducked my head awkwardly for a moment, "hey Dad."

When I looked back up at him, my eyes roving him to make sure he was still in good health, I saw he was doing the same to me.

His whole face was soft and fond, and for a moment it felt like when I was a kid again, and my Dad was this tall, warm presence with wisdom just waiting to pour from his mouth.

"Quil came by again," he uttered, and the moment was broken.

I looked off to the side, a bitter twist to my face, "yeah?"

He watched me with an implacable gaze for a few seconds, before he gently but firmly reminded me, "you know you can't tell him anything."

"I know," my voice was impatient and short. He didn't need to tell me. I was already painfully aware of how much I couldn't talk to Quil. I knew it was only temporary, but I hated being told what I could and couldn't say or do with my friends when it was because of this werewolf crap.

"I don't need to remind you that we support Sam when he says it's best not to see Quil if you can help it, until he phases. It's easier that way. No temptation to let something slip."

I hid my shaking fists behind my back and choked back the rage that was suddenly thick in my throat.

"I know."

 _Easier_. It wasn't easier. Who were they kidding. It wasn't easier for Quil. It wasn't easier for me. It wasn't easier for Embry. It hadn't been easier for us when it was Embry who was suddenly not speaking to us, and I couldn't imagine how much not easier it was for Quil by himself.

He was probably miserable. Someone so upbeat like Quil should never have an expression like I'd seen on him the other day.

I didn't agree with keeping things hidden from those who were approaching their shift, and being distant with them, until they were freaking out because one second they were spitting mad and the next they were a huge wolf.

But as usual, what Sam said went. Apparently he didn't want to tell anyone new unless they were wolves (barring imprints), in order for guaranteed secrecy which was ensured by Alpha edict.

All of a sudden I felt exhausted, and yearning to just leave for Forks. For Charlie.

Unlike my dad, my sudden growth and physical ageing hadn't changed the way that Charlie treated me much. Perhaps if it was anyone else, still being treated like I was just a fairly mature 16 year old would rankle, but Charlie had such a dependable and solid air about him, that it was almost a relief that I could be more of a kid around him.

There was no unspoken knowledge of pack and wolves and history and expectations between us. It was just Jacob Black, whoever I wanted that to be, and Charlie Swan, working together to look for someone we both loved.

It was simple and honest in a way nothing else was in my life right now. Even before I shifted, there was always the burden of looking after Dad without help to shoulder.

I didn't resent him for being disabled of course. It wasn't easy though, constantly looking after him without support. Especially when he often refused to listen to what the doctors told him he should be eating, which left me to clean up the mess that his poor health resulted in.

There was none of that with Charlie. He didn't give me anything to do I couldn't handle, and he was there for me the moment I started to struggle. He saw me as young still, and anything I had difficulty with wasn't me shirking responsibility in his eyes.

It just... it was almost like having another parent. A friend who was a parent when I needed him to be.

"I'm really tired, Dad. I should go," I blurted.

He eyed me silently for a short while longer, before he nodded at me.

"Okay then, goodnight son."

Before I became a werewolf I would have approached him for gentle pat on the arm, or sat shoulder to shoulder with him for a bit watching TV together, and enjoying his presence.

The distance between us had never felt so large, and I a heavy weight settled in my chest that resembled something like grief.

"Goodnight."

I turned from him silently, my back and shoulders stiff with unnamed emotions. I kept my mind carefully blank, as I walked back amongst the trees and stripped.

* * *

I ignored the back and forth between Paul and Embry as I ran the now familiar route.

I barely took the time to appreciate the damp smells of dew soaked greenery, the cool air whistling in my ears, the comforting quiet of the forest. It wasn't long before I was once more facing the building that was increasingly my home.

I unzipped the small lower pocket on my shorts and produced the house key Charlie had given me not long after he'd invited me to stay in Bella's room, and approached the building.

Something wasn't right. The hair on the back of my neck prickled in warning.

I frowned and lifted my head, scenting the air. My whole body stiffened as alarms blared through my head deafeningly.

Vampire.

Not giving a thought to alerting the pack, I raced up to the front door, and quickly unlocked it, barely resisting the temptation to just barge through and knock it off it's hinges.

I desperately scented the air, scared that I would be confronted with the smell of Charlie's blood liberally coating the house.

Images of Charlie's body mangled and waiting just around the corner flickered in front of me. Images of a pale demon crouched over him and feasting from his veins.

My whole body trembled and shook with the aggression of the suppressed shift and the terror of finding I was too late.

I was hardly relieved to find the scent was hours old, and that I couldn't detect any blood- the visions scattering themselves through my mind refused to abate.

"Ch-Charlie?" The name scraped its way out of my throat painfully, and I listened in agony for the few seconds it took to hear a reply.

"Jake? That you, kid? You don't sound too good. You sick?"

I released a shaky breath that was half a sigh of relief and half sob.

"Oh thank God," I whispered to myself thickly. I took a few deep breaths to ground myself, and waited for the tremors to decrease.

"Jacob? You okay?" Charlie's concerned voice settled me further.

"Yeah. I'm just... it's been a long a day," I called back, as I walked into the kitchen to see Charlie sitting at the table in front of a laptop.

My nose tickled and burned slightly as the sickly sweet, crisp smell of vampire irritated my senses.

I wanted to know who the hell had been in this house, and why. Was it me? Did my presence here bring the bloodsucker to investigate?

Had I inadvertently put Charlie in danger? The idea that it had something to do with the Cullens nudged at me, but there was no way to know.

All I had was the fact that Charlie wasn't dead, and so it couldn't have been for feeding purposes.

Charlie cleared his throat, "sit down, kid. There's some frozen dinners on, and I got some news to share before they're done."

I paused, suddenly noticing a piece of paper he seemed intent on folding and unfolding, his fingers creasing corners restlessly.

I noticed that the stink of vampire emanated most strongly from the kitchen table, and the spare chair.

There was barely anything from the living room. Like the parasite had just casually entered through the front door, and sat down across from Charlie.

I swallowed against the sudden rush of adrenaline, and took a measured breath, before I sat in the same chair I suspected the leech did.

"So... What's the news?" I asked, gripping my hands together tightly to hide the small tremor. Maybe it was news on Bella, and nothing to do with the vampire.

I didn't know which I would rather hear about; if it was Bella I'd have no real idea of what the bloodsucker wanted. It would remain an unknown threat and thus more difficult to respond to.

Charlie blew out a tired breath and sat back in his seat, "I'll start from the beginning so I don't forget anything."

"Sure."

"The guys finished going through Bella's computer today."

I tensed for a moment, not having considered the possibility that there'd be any supernatural secrets on there before now.

"It turns out, this whole time, pretty much since the Cullens left, Bella's been sending emails to one of them."

"Wait, what?! She's been in contact with them this whole time?"

"No, no. Nothing like that. She's been emailing one of the girls called Alice. I don't know how much you know about the Cullens, but they were fairly close. Anyway, Alice deactivated her account at some point before Bella started emailing, but I guess because Bella didn't have her new one, she ... I don't know, used sending things to the deactivated account as a way to write a diary... or something. Either way, they all bounced back, but we've got a consistent record of what was going on on for her week to week and where her head was at.

"What became apparent pretty quickly to the guys was that even when Bella started feeling a bit better and hanging out down at the Rez, she still thought about Edward a lot. She still figured herself in love with him," Charlie's nose wrinkled in tandem with mine, and we shared a grimace.

"The upshot is that they think there's a chance she ran off to the Cullens. Maybe they texted or called or just showed up, and given the split choice, she left with them. They won't look for her as long as it's unclear whether she's missing or a runaway."

I dug my nails into the backs of my hands as I held them together firmly, preventing any violent motions I might otherwise be tempted to.

"And do you think she did? Run off to the Cullens that is, to be 'super romantically in love for ever and ever'," my stomach churned at the thought that she'd been given the option to be bitten by one of them and had left with them to take it and become a monster.

If that was the case, and any Cullen ever showed their face here again I'd give everything I had to destroy them.

"No. I don't think she did. But unfortunately I can't entirely rule it out. What about you?" Charlie asked quietly.

"No," I practically whispered, "I don't think so either." I couldn't bare the idea. I didn't even want to comprehend it.

"I'm afraid your word and my word don't make a difference to the case though. We need proof," Charlie's face was grim, and it took me a moment to realise why.

"You need to contact them?" He nodded wearily.

"Why didn't the guys contact the Cullens when they suspected she'd run off?"

"They did. Apparently, whatever new hospital phone number Doctor Cullen left the hospital put them through to a place that claimed he didn't work there. They think it was a new receptionist who'd never met him because he and his family have left already and moved again. It's a dead end from there."

Well that would make sense. If you were an immortal monster that needed to fly under the radar, starting fresh whilst leaving no links between the new life and the old one would be the easiest way to go about it.

The only questions were whether Charlie would fall for it, or find a way forward, and if he found a way forward would I help him or hinder him? Especially if it meant there being a chance of him finding out about vampires.

I didn't know. I frowned at my uncertainty, and realised it may be a decision I'd have to face soon.

"So, what do you want to do?"

"I've already done something. I didn't want to take the idea that they'd moved again at face value, so I went to the hospital directly to double check the phone number, and see if they had any more information for me that might help. I got a number for the new hospital and an address.

"I've called the number for the hospital, and I got the same answer- that there is no Carlisle Cullen working there. I asked if they could tell me his new place of work and they checked and said in the last six months there have been no Carlisle Cullens working there as doctors.

"So I thought maybe they had the wrong number written down. Except I checked the address and it was fairly close by that same hospital. But it's a PO box. It's incredibly difficult to find out over the phone or the internet who owns a PO box if it's personal, from what I could tell. I tried anyway. I'm... not the best at research using phones and computers so it's been a heck of a learning curve today."

"And?" I held my breath nervously.

"I've been at it constantly, and found out just before you came in, that it's registered to a business. Thankfully it was a little easier to get my answers because of this."

"What company?" I asked, confused. What kind of company would blood sucking monsters own? Donating organs and blood?

"It's a law firm. That's all I got, for now. I'll look into it further another time. You've got to admit though Jake, it all looks... off."

I paused, wondering once more how far I was willing to support Charlie in this line of thought.

"Yeah it does. You definitely want to chase this up? What if it takes weeks? What if you're chasing after the wrong people this whole time?"

Charlie nodded, his lips were thin as he thought carefully, but he was less troubled than I thought he'd be at the idea, and I realised he'd already considered this.

"I think it's a chance I'm going to have to be willing to take. It might be a complete mistake. But I have to look into every chance I'll get that presents itself in finding Bella, and after almost a month of less than nothing, this is showing up as a huge pile of something's not right."

Charlie looked up at me, as he continued fiddling with the piece of paper in his hands.

"What do you think?"

What did I think? Would I get in Charlie's way to protect him from ever getting close to something as dangerous as a coven of vampires? Would I back him up?

I couldn't tell him the truth about the supernatural, but was there even a chance that going after them would reveal their secret, or would he just find them to discover if Bella was with them for sure?

What if she was? What if they'd turned her? What if she'd done all of this on purpose? Through such blind devotion to that parasite that had hurt her, that she'd been ignorant or uncaring of who she'd left behind?

What could I do if I even wanted to stop Charlie? Cut off his internet? Tell a law firm not to speak to a cop?

What the heck was a law firm even doing with a PO box the vampires were handing out?

"I'd like answers too, Charlie. If this is the way you think we'll get them, then I'll back you up."

Jesus, Sam was going to kill me if he found out that I was encouraging Charlie to find the Cullens.

Especially if it brought them back into town.

Hopefully it wouldn't. I mean, it wasn't like they cared about Bella anymore. If they ever did. Otherwise they never would have hurt her so badly.

Charlie cleared his throat, and my attention was brought back to him.

"There's another thing. When I got back today, a family friend of the Cullens was waiting for me."

I stiffened, my heart picking up as I contemplated this.

"Yeah? A family friend?"

Is that what they called each other? Family friends? Or were they cousins? Or maybe adopted? I couldn't remember, and when the information was freely available I hadn't been interested.

"Yeah, she was looking for Bella."

At that sentence I felt a cold rush in my veins.

"What."

"She hoped Bella would be able to tell her where the Cullens were. I didn't have much to tell her, but I gave her the number and address I had, and got her number on this piece of paper in return. We agreed to swap information, since they're the closest thing to family she has thanks to a recent tragedy."

I squashed down my immediate urge to jump up and do something. Take the bitch out. Rip her to pieces. Tell her to stay the hell away from Charlie. Delete the phone number from Charlie's mind.

"Really," I murmured through numb lips, distantly aware of my shaking body.

"That's right, I don't know how much Bella talked about the Cullens, so I don't know if she ever mentioned her, especially since it sounded like they only met the once. You ever hear of Viola?"

I shook my head almost mechanically. My hands were now hidden, gripping the seat of my chair, on the verge of snapping it, in order to cover up how badly I wanted to shift.

I knew I was furious, but it a was detached, distant thing.

"No? Huh, maybe you'd know her by description. I know Bella struggled to say their names after they left. Viola said she was probably related to the Cullens, and I can definitely see the resemblance. Pale skin, very... noticeable features. Very polite. She sounded a bit English I think. I don't know, I'm not good at accents. It was subtle. Jake? Hey, kid? You're looking a little flushed and tense. Are you okay?"

Little bits of wood splintered into my palms, and I could practically feel the wolf roiling underneath my skin, desperate to burst out.

"Peachy," I almost growled, "what color were her eyes?"

"Uh... if you insist. You do look a bit... not okay. Anyway, I don't know about her eyes, she kept sunglasses on, but that wasn't really what stood out. She had hair like I'd never seen it before. A bright, fire red, big and curly. You'd definitely know if you'd met her before just from that."

 _NO!_ No, no, no. That _thing_ had not waltzed into my goddam home, like a smug piece of shit, and sat down across from Charlie, knowing I'd smell it and asked after Bella!

This couldn't be interpreted as anything but a threat from that _disgusting_ monster. It knew a vulnerability of mine and it wanted me to know it.

This was exactly the sort of thing I wanted to prevent by taking patrols. How had it gotten past us? I'd thought we were playing it safe, but we were underestimating her this whole time.

No. I couldn't believe it'd sat in this chair, more than capable of slaughtering Charlie at any given moment on a whim, while I screwed around on Sam's useless patrols, and the pack laughed it off as an inconvenient irritant.

How dare it! How dare that repulsive bitch enter my home, and threaten my family, and leave again like there was no danger!

I'd track it down and tear it apart. Then I'd burn it piece by piece, leaving the head till last so it could watch itself go up in flames and do nothing!

"Jake! Jesus, Jacob! Calm down! What the hell is wrong with you?"

" _Don't_ contact her," I snarled viciously, only peripherally aware that I was stalking back and forth across the room, splinters digging into my clenched fists and drawing forth little spots of trickling blood, the chair broken on its back half way across the room.

"What? Why? Jacob! Calm. Down. Tell me what's going on. Right now," he demanded, standing up, and raising his palms.

I couldn't though. I couldn't calm down with its sickly scent taunting me, and making my thoughts spiral.

I took a deep, shuddering breath, to match my shivering, shuddering muscles and spoke in a raw bass through gritted teeth.

"We've met her. She's... not good."

"We? You mean down at the Rez?"

I nodded tersely, still pacing and shaking.

"What do you mean no good? What's she even doing down there in the first place?"

Unable to formulate an acceptable lie and then articulate it, I merely released a furious jagged sound from my throat, that barely passed for human.

"Okay, okay. So clearly she's done something to make you mad. Is she... I don't know, racist?"

Good enough. I nodded once. Sure why not. Racist against humans and werewolves and more than willing to kill them.

"What's she still doing hanging around the Rez then, if she's like that? Does Sam Uley know she's around and what she's like?"

Right. Sam projected himself as some sort of mentor figure/go between for the older and younger generations, to members outside of the community.

Well, technically he knew what she was like and that she was around. I didn't have the words to explain trying to run out someone as slippery, deceptive and wily as she was, in non supernatural terms.

"And he's not chased her out? I assume it's people closer to your age that she's bothering, seeing as the idea of her makes you so mad. The older folks would probably just call the station on her, and the younger ones would have concerned parents to do the same. That right?"

It was easier to let Charlie come up with an acceptable story that he'd believe than attempt to come up with one myself. All I knew was that Charlie could not think she was an acceptable person to be in contact with.

He was my lifeline in this new screwed up life I had, and it had become apparent to me the moment I thought he might be dead, that I needed him a hell of a lot more than I thought I did.

If she took him from me...

"Jake, you seriously need to calm down. What in the world is going on with you?"

Charlie eyed me suspiciously, and seemed to come to some conclusions. He shifted and cleared his throat, before locking stern eyes with me.

"Look, Jacob, I didn't really want to approach this right now, given how helpful you've been with the search for Bella, and how stressful everything over the past few weeks have been but... well, you obviously don't like Viola, and consider her dangerous. Sam, despite this, hasn't done anything about her, and although I want to think the best of people and I've never really seen anything to implicate... aw heck. I've heard some things about the fact that Sam inducts boys around a certain age into some sort of group and then all of a sudden they're shooting up and filling out like crazy.

Is it drugs? Is Sam pushing steroids on you guys and other drugs? Is Victoria the supplier? You can tell me if that's the case, kid. Even if he's using you kids to sell them amongst your peers and in school, I can still help you. Please, just tell me what you've been taking and how often. If you're on a serious come down, or an overdose, I need to know so I can get you medical help.

Damn it, there's probably so many better ways that I could've approached this, but I need to know now Jacob, what sort of help you need. I don't want to deal with you throwing up on yourself and passing out. Or any other number of symptoms. Not without proper medical help."

I stood, frozen and bug eyed at Charlie. Drugs? Steroids?

To be honest it wasn't the first time people had come to that conclusion. And yet somehow it still sounded completely bizarre coming out of Charlie's mouth.

The idea that Sam the hard ass Alpha werewolf and Viola the evil psycho bitch vampire, would act shady by the beach, whilst swapping some steroids and pills for cash like some sort of common drug dealer on the street.

I suddenly had the ridiculous image of Sam, his eyes flicking from side to side in paranoia, shuffling closer to the slouching bloodsucker, wearing a baggy top, hoodie, loose sweatpants, trainers and a baseball cap swaggering up to Sam, like a cliche, and saying in a bad English accent, "want some roids, man?"

And strangely, the sheer stupidity and absurdity of that vivid scene in my mind, was enough to break through the rage that had been clouding me.

I couldn't help it, I doubled over and burst out laughing.

Even well after I should have been able to pick myself up and stop howling with laughter, I was almost on my hands and knees with tears in my eyes and flushed cheeks.

It was exactly what I needed to offload all the built up stress, worries and disappointments of the day.

God, Charlie killed me sometimes. Viola, the racist vampire drug dealer.

Eventually, I was able to pick myself up and hold back most of my almost hysterical laughter, with only a few bubbles escaping.

I made eye contact with a Charlie's dry face, and almost cracked all over again.

"I'm assuming that's a no on the steroids then."

Goddamit. What came out of my mouth were more cackles than anything else. Every time I almost collected myself, I'd make eye contact with an increasingly amused Charlie and start laughing again.

Eventually Charlie gave an exasperated huff, and approached me.

"Alright, that's it. Out. Go and get some fresh air, and come back when you've found your sanity."

He began to lead me by a hand to the back as fresh peals of laughter left me.

"Out. Out. Out. Go for a walk. Don't go too far, and come back when you can keep a straight face. Or better yet, text me the information you want to give me about all this, since apparently you can't look at my face and even think about it without laughing."

Charlie's voice was grudgingly fond, as he shoved me out the front door. Still chuckling to myself, I walked far enough away from the house to be out of earshot, before finally taking a deep breath and cooling down.

Reaching into my zipped pocket I fished out the only other item I kept in there, I dialled Sam. Eventually it reached answer machine, and so I groaned and called the only other pack member who I knew would be by their phone no matter the time of day.

"What!" Leah's irritated, sleepy voice blared out of the phone, making me wince.

"Hey, it's Jake."

"I know, asshole. What do you want."

"The red headed bloodsucker came to Charlie's house today, and spoke to him."

"What?! When, why? Is he still alive! Hold there I'm coming over to kill it."

"Leah! It's gone. It was hours ago. The thing could be miles and miles away by now. Look, it came here looking for Bella. It claimed to know the Cullens, but I doubt it was all that friendly with them, considering it's diet and what it's been doing for weeks. Charlie's fine. But he's clearly exposed. We need someone watching the house straight away. I can watch out for him when I'm here during the day, but at night I'm going to be letting my guard down, and I can't be here all the time."

"Yeah, I got it. Why don't you just shift and let the others know."

"Because I'll get caught up in some sort of pack debate, and then Sam will be there coming to his final decision that I'll have to follow, and it'll probably be along the lines of 'don't interact with Charlie directly anymore' or some crap. Also the leech left Charlie it's phone number to help with the search.

"I need to tell him something that's going to make him not want to talk to it ever again, before Sam can dictate what that something is. It's easier to ignore Sam as a human, I just have to plug my ears, or in this case cover the speaker on the phone. Can't do that as a wolf," I semi-bluffed, leaving out mentions of supporting Charlie's search for the Cullens.

"Sneaky," she complemented, "Alright, what have you got to work with so far in terms of back story the parasite gave?"

"It said it was a family friend, I think. And a distant relative. Apparently it met Bella once, and is looking for the Cullens. It thinks Bella could help with the search. The thing is, Charlie wants to know where the Cullens have gone too, to make sure Bella's not with them, so he wants to keep updated with it."

There was a short silence on the end of the phone, "are you sure she's not actually with them?"

"I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about the psycho leech," I snapped.

"Fine," she huffed, "make it about relationships or something. Sounds to me like Bella Swan had terrible taste in romance and potential partners, as well as terrible luck in them. I don't think it would be too hard to believe if we add creepy stalky jilted lover in there somewhere."

I ignored the spike of heated irritation in my chest that came with Leah's assessment of Bella.

"I don't know. He already knows the bloodsucker's been making enough trouble down in the Rez amongst us, for me to hate it. Why would it be down there in this story?"

"What sort of trouble?"

"Charlie thinks the thing is a total bigot."

Leah barked with a short harsh laugh, "that's almost too good. Alright, did it claim to know Bella was missing already? Or not?"

"Uh... no it didn't. Well, it said it didn't. I don't think the tick was lying about that."

"Well, whether it was or wasn't doesn't matter as much right now. We're just coming up with something believable. Say that the bloodsucker wants Bella's ex-leech, and when it saw them together the first time, it got creepy obsessed."

"You want me to make out like it's Edward Cullen's psycho stalker? I think Charlie might like the leech better if he thinks it'll do something messed up like cut bits of Edward up and carry them with it as keepsakes."

Leah sighed at me like I was slow, "no you idiot. Make the leech _Bella's_ stalker. Just say that it was hanging out at the Rez, making trouble since it's a bigot and rude, which was getting in the way of it's actual goal- being to find out where Bella lived. The bloodsucker had seen her with you, and knew you were a part of Sam's gang. Hence the continued harassment."

"Wait, I'm confused. You want me to claim this leech has some sort of big lesbian crush on Bella, and is doing a bad but psycho attempt at stalking her because of it?"

"You asshole, you _have_ seen that film!"

"Leah, I literally have no idea what you're talking about. Can we stay on topic?" I snapped.

"Ugh, fine. But I'm onto you. And no, you've got it wrong. So the parasite has a massively weird, inappropriate crush on Elwood, or whatever (because wasn't he pretending to be underage?). Anyway, it met Bella once, while Edward and she were all lovey dovey and was really envious, to the point that not only does the leech want what Bella has, it wants to be Bella. So it leaves pretty quick to go home, but doesn't know where Bella lives, since the parasite did give off creepy vibes and everyone was reluctant to tell it too much.

It comes back months later, looking for the Cullens, and Bella, and finds the Cullens gone. So, the leech wants to find Bella. You don't know why, or what it intends to do, but it's sort of obsessed. The bloodsucker sees you two together, and a few weeks later starts harassing you and the group, by which point Bella is already missing. There. You're welcome."

I hesitated. Would that work? "I don't know, Leah. That seems a little complicated. And unbelievable."

"What, as opposed to sparkling immortal blood drinkers?" She sneered, annoyed, "look, I just gave you an story that won't allow Sam an excuse to keep you away from Charlie, and means that while the parasite hasn't done anything illegal to make Charlie chase it, and it isn't a suspect in Bella going missing, it's creepy enough to be a liability for Charlie, given his priorities. Since someone like that wouldn't be interested in truly helping him, when they had their own agenda going."

"I guess," I replied slowly. I was too tired to think it through properly, and judge whether it was something I could actually use, or riddled with holes. Either way, it had given me something solid to start with, "thanks Leah. I'll have said something to Charlie before I see Sam tomorrow. In the mean time could you have someone sent over to see if they can follow the scent from the house, and see where the bloodsucker came from and where it left to? We need to know how it got passed us. I'd do it myself, but I'm so tired I might miss something important."

"Sure thing, asshole. I'll go round to Sam's now and wake him up, or else take way too much joy in awkwardly interrupting his sex life."

I turned a little green at the images that bombarded my sleepy brain, and wheezed out, "thanks for that, Leah."

"Whatever. Don't interrupt my sleep again, unless it's an emergency."

"And this wasn't?" I asked in disbelief. She merely scoffed down the end of the phone and hung up.

I wearily sighed, and rubbed my eyes. Hopefully Charlie was unconscious already, so I had time to sleep on what was probably going to be a completely terrible idea of a story, before I had to tell it to him- and somehow tell it convincingly.

When this fell apart around my ears, I was definitely pointing the blame at Leah.

Trudging back to the house, and making my way through the living room, I could see Charlie passed out on the sofa.

Something smelt weird. Sniffing a few more times, my eyebrows shot upward in horror, as I raced to the kitchen.

"Charlie!" I yelled. He bolted upright, looking at me in alarm.

"What?!"

I yanked the oven door open, and smoke came pouring out. Only just remembering to grab oven gloves, I yanked the ready made dinners out, and looked at the melted, smoking, plastic food mess that was stuck to the tray.

Hurrying outside, I placed it quickly on the wet ground, and ran back inside, grabbing a jug of water to pour on to it. Finally, I opened all of the downstairs windows, in order to air the place out, and turned, unimpressed, to Charlie.

"Oops?" He offered, "I have no idea what I did wrong with it."

"Well, I'm no chef, but from what I can tell, having looked at that plastic soup in the tray; that was supposed to go in the microwave, not the oven. Also you need to remove the cardboard first. Also you _fell asleep_. I'd guess that was what went wrong."

Charlie scratched the back of his head in sheepish thoughtfulness, "that makes sense."

He frowned suddenly, guiltily, "there's probably a lot of smoke upstairs, right?"

"Yes, it probably reeks up there." I got a bad feeling.

"Oh. I think I left your door open," he admitted, and then yawned, "Well, goodnight kid. I'll see you tomorrow. Be ready with a good explanation about our previous conversation, since I let you off tonight."

He turned and sleepily made his way up the stairs, as I stared after in disbelieving outrage.

* * *

 _Bueno! All done!_

 _So do you think Leah and Jake's plan will work? If not, what will go wrong?_

 _How do you think Leah's and Jake's relationship will progress? What about Jake and Billy?_

 _What do you think Charlie will find as he chases after leads on the Cullens?_

I know Charlie's google-fu abilities are probably a little unrealistic given his character, but suspend disbelief x (also sorry for the completely random, out of place mean girls references. I couldn't help myself)


End file.
